obviously not really wanting to go, but respecting my wishes for privacy. I got up and turned on the light, closing the door behind her before turning toward Dustin.
"Thank you for coming. I know you're upset at me, and with good reason." He shook his head, about to interrupt. "No," I said. "You were right. I haven't been taking care of myself. And now I'm losing control more than ever."
"Jason, I don't believe these are simple blackouts from Post-Traumatic stress. From what I've read, people in blackouts cannot respond normally to outside stimuli. If you were blacked out this evening, you wouldn't have been able to react and respond normally, let alone eat and drink and joke around. Although the joking should have given it away to everyone," I glared and he held his hands up as a shield. "Hey, I'm just sayin'. It's not like you've been happy go lucky up 'til now. Why would you start so soon after your last blackout?"
"Good point," I grumbled. "So why wouldn't anyone notice? Or were they just too polite to call me on phony behavior?"
"I honestly can't say. I wasn't there. It's possible that somehow you weren't being phony. Maybe they just saw you having a good time, and hoped you were starting to turn a corner. No one could have suspected that you were in the midst of a blackout. You can't blame them."
Maybe I couldn't, not logically. But somehow I felt that someone should have realized that something was off. "I don't. Not really. It's just…" I trailed off, not sure how to continue.
Dustin shook his head and looked down slightly. "Maybe we should start with what you remember before the dinner. What were you doing when you lost yourself?"
It seemed like an easy answer. I'd been using my abilities to fix the mess I'd made earlier that night and then nothing, right? Maybe, but there was something… something right on the edge of my consciousness. Something I had sensed before I'd lost myself again. I rubbed at my forehead, trying to dig the memory up. "Jason, ease up. Just relax and let it come to you. You can't force it," Dustin said, putting his hand on my arm to stop my frantic rubbing.
"There's something I need to remember. I sensed something right after I fixed my mess." I looked up at him in realization. "It was footsteps."
"Whose footsteps? Jason, who was there?"
My body shook with fear and anxiety as I finally allowed myself to believe what my abilities were telling me. "It was Kindred."
FOURTEEN
Hannah
What happened last night had shaken all of us. Dustin and Jason had stayed in his room talking for quite a while, voices occasionally rising so we could hear them, although the specifics of the conversation remained between the two guys. It was how Jason wanted it. I had to keep telling myself that he'd tell us when he was ready, but it was hard living with him knowing that he was having so many problems. All I wanted was for him to trust me enough to be able to help him, but apparently that was too much to ask.
"Ease up, little sis," Alice said with a chuckle. "The dish is clean." I set the glass I'd been scrubbing down into the drying rack and turned to her. "Whoa, Hannah. Honey, he'll be fine. We'll figure this out." She pulled me into a hug and I sobbed into her shoulder, surprising myself with the sudden display of emotion.
"Sorry, Ali. I don't know what came over me," I said pulling away and wiping my face with my hands. "I'll just finish these up before I head to class."
She cocked her head and looked me over critically. "You don't have class for another two hours."
"Yeah, I'm meeting some friends for a study session first. There's a test today. I can't miss it. It counts for forty percent of my grade." I was feeling defensive all of a sudden. It felt wrong to go to class like normal when Jason was going through who knows what by himself.
Alice looked at me sympathetically, her mouth twitching in a gentle smile. "You don't need to feel guilty, Hannah. It's okay to go to class and act
"Thank you for coming. I know you're upset at me, and with good reason." He shook his head, about to interrupt. "No," I said. "You were right. I haven't been taking care of myself. And now I'm losing control more than ever."
"Jason, I don't believe these are simple blackouts from Post-Traumatic stress. From what I've read, people in blackouts cannot respond normally to outside stimuli. If you were blacked out this evening, you wouldn't have been able to react and respond normally, let alone eat and drink and joke around. Although the joking should have given it away to everyone," I glared and he held his hands up as a shield. "Hey, I'm just sayin'. It's not like you've been happy go lucky up 'til now. Why would you start so soon after your last blackout?"
"Good point," I grumbled. "So why wouldn't anyone notice? Or were they just too polite to call me on phony behavior?"
"I honestly can't say. I wasn't there. It's possible that somehow you weren't being phony. Maybe they just saw you having a good time, and hoped you were starting to turn a corner. No one could have suspected that you were in the midst of a blackout. You can't blame them."
Maybe I couldn't, not logically. But somehow I felt that someone should have realized that something was off. "I don't. Not really. It's just…" I trailed off, not sure how to continue.
Dustin shook his head and looked down slightly. "Maybe we should start with what you remember before the dinner. What were you doing when you lost yourself?"
It seemed like an easy answer. I'd been using my abilities to fix the mess I'd made earlier that night and then nothing, right? Maybe, but there was something… something right on the edge of my consciousness. Something I had sensed before I'd lost myself again. I rubbed at my forehead, trying to dig the memory up. "Jason, ease up. Just relax and let it come to you. You can't force it," Dustin said, putting his hand on my arm to stop my frantic rubbing.
"There's something I need to remember. I sensed something right after I fixed my mess." I looked up at him in realization. "It was footsteps."
"Whose footsteps? Jason, who was there?"
My body shook with fear and anxiety as I finally allowed myself to believe what my abilities were telling me. "It was Kindred."
FOURTEEN
Hannah
What happened last night had shaken all of us. Dustin and Jason had stayed in his room talking for quite a while, voices occasionally rising so we could hear them, although the specifics of the conversation remained between the two guys. It was how Jason wanted it. I had to keep telling myself that he'd tell us when he was ready, but it was hard living with him knowing that he was having so many problems. All I wanted was for him to trust me enough to be able to help him, but apparently that was too much to ask.
"Ease up, little sis," Alice said with a chuckle. "The dish is clean." I set the glass I'd been scrubbing down into the drying rack and turned to her. "Whoa, Hannah. Honey, he'll be fine. We'll figure this out." She pulled me into a hug and I sobbed into her shoulder, surprising myself with the sudden display of emotion.
"Sorry, Ali. I don't know what came over me," I said pulling away and wiping my face with my hands. "I'll just finish these up before I head to class."
She cocked her head and looked me over critically. "You don't have class for another two hours."
"Yeah, I'm meeting some friends for a study session first. There's a test today. I can't miss it. It counts for forty percent of my grade." I was feeling defensive all of a sudden. It felt wrong to go to class like normal when Jason was going through who knows what by himself.
Alice looked at me sympathetically, her mouth twitching in a gentle smile. "You don't need to feel guilty, Hannah. It's okay to go to class and act
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