work day. I was just leaving.”
Van’s look was hurt. He told Edward, “Lila was doing some river-gazing when I came along.”
She said, “And it’s time I got home.”
Edward shook his head and looked paternal. telling her, “I hope you know how much I admire everything you’re doing, despite our situation. You never get discouraged. That’s character.”
“Well, thanks.” Lila made it as sugary as she could. “Does that mean you’re rethinking my loan application?”
Edward chided gently. “You know I’d never talk about your business in front of another party.” He nodded at Van.
Van said, “I’ll talk about it. There ought to be something you can do.”
“I wish there were. If it was up to me...” He gestured futility. “My hands are tied. The board... The times... The business is full of obstacles.”
Lila tried not to growl. “It’s full of something,”
Edward stiffened. His gaze twitched toward Van. When Van kept his silence, Edward looked back to Lila. He said, “I wish you had some idea of the pressures on me. In the larger scheme of things, your own case is quite minor, frankly. Just so you know, there are those connected to my bank who’ve severely criticized my judgment on the original loan. You look at your dream and it blinds you to everything else.” Again, his thin smile bared those fox teeth. Lila pictured a chicken feather stuck there.
She said, “Your bank's the one that's blind. Don't all businesses start with borrowed money? You can't make money if I can't.”
Edward repeated his weary gesture of helplessness. “Ms. Milam, it’s not as if... If I could...” He shrugged to a stop.
It was all Lila needed to push her over the edge. She said, “You can’t even finish a sentence. Why did I ever expect you to actually do something?”
Oozing dignity, Edward told Van. “It’s been a pleasure talking to you.” He accented the “you,” and included Lila, but with a glare. She returned it. He strode off.
Van said, “Cool. That should wrap up any chance you had.”
Defiantly, Lila said, “I don’t care. I begged him for help. He said I should sell. He said you’d make me a good offer.”
“I never talked to him about it. He knows I’d treat the property right. You do, too.”
“I don’t want to sell. Can’t anyone understand that?” She opened her car door.
“No, I don’t understand, but I still did everything you asked. I hated going behind Edward’s back to try to get him to do something that could get him in serious trouble. What I do understand is that you’re being unreasonable.”
The heat of her anger turned to ice. She said, “Forgive me,” and slipped onto the car seat, slamming the door.
Through the glass, Van went on. “He’s right about dreams, Lila; they blind you. This thing’s too much. Let me help you before you get yourself in trouble.”
For a long moment, she held his gaze, then, “You don’t get it, do you? Look, I like you, I really do. I appreciate all you’ve done. Just don’t think you know me. You think running up a bunch of debt is what I’d call trouble? It’s not even significant.” She started the car, pulling away from the curb so quickly Van leaped back.
Speeding around the corner, she lowered the window, relishing the frigid slash of night air. By the time she reached home she was shivering. Her headlights pinned the old building against the darkness, picked out its every haggard flaw. She turned off the engine and slumped against the steering wheel. Softly, the words not much more than accent to the chill fog of her breath, she repeated what she’d said to Van; “...not even significant.” She forced a laugh meant to be scornful. It tasted like acid and sounded worse.
* * * * *
Five minutes after Lila left him, Van had walked the few blocks to Edward Lawton’s parked car. He opened the passenger side and slid in. The
Van’s look was hurt. He told Edward, “Lila was doing some river-gazing when I came along.”
She said, “And it’s time I got home.”
Edward shook his head and looked paternal. telling her, “I hope you know how much I admire everything you’re doing, despite our situation. You never get discouraged. That’s character.”
“Well, thanks.” Lila made it as sugary as she could. “Does that mean you’re rethinking my loan application?”
Edward chided gently. “You know I’d never talk about your business in front of another party.” He nodded at Van.
Van said, “I’ll talk about it. There ought to be something you can do.”
“I wish there were. If it was up to me...” He gestured futility. “My hands are tied. The board... The times... The business is full of obstacles.”
Lila tried not to growl. “It’s full of something,”
Edward stiffened. His gaze twitched toward Van. When Van kept his silence, Edward looked back to Lila. He said, “I wish you had some idea of the pressures on me. In the larger scheme of things, your own case is quite minor, frankly. Just so you know, there are those connected to my bank who’ve severely criticized my judgment on the original loan. You look at your dream and it blinds you to everything else.” Again, his thin smile bared those fox teeth. Lila pictured a chicken feather stuck there.
She said, “Your bank's the one that's blind. Don't all businesses start with borrowed money? You can't make money if I can't.”
Edward repeated his weary gesture of helplessness. “Ms. Milam, it’s not as if... If I could...” He shrugged to a stop.
It was all Lila needed to push her over the edge. She said, “You can’t even finish a sentence. Why did I ever expect you to actually do something?”
Oozing dignity, Edward told Van. “It’s been a pleasure talking to you.” He accented the “you,” and included Lila, but with a glare. She returned it. He strode off.
Van said, “Cool. That should wrap up any chance you had.”
Defiantly, Lila said, “I don’t care. I begged him for help. He said I should sell. He said you’d make me a good offer.”
“I never talked to him about it. He knows I’d treat the property right. You do, too.”
“I don’t want to sell. Can’t anyone understand that?” She opened her car door.
“No, I don’t understand, but I still did everything you asked. I hated going behind Edward’s back to try to get him to do something that could get him in serious trouble. What I do understand is that you’re being unreasonable.”
The heat of her anger turned to ice. She said, “Forgive me,” and slipped onto the car seat, slamming the door.
Through the glass, Van went on. “He’s right about dreams, Lila; they blind you. This thing’s too much. Let me help you before you get yourself in trouble.”
For a long moment, she held his gaze, then, “You don’t get it, do you? Look, I like you, I really do. I appreciate all you’ve done. Just don’t think you know me. You think running up a bunch of debt is what I’d call trouble? It’s not even significant.” She started the car, pulling away from the curb so quickly Van leaped back.
Speeding around the corner, she lowered the window, relishing the frigid slash of night air. By the time she reached home she was shivering. Her headlights pinned the old building against the darkness, picked out its every haggard flaw. She turned off the engine and slumped against the steering wheel. Softly, the words not much more than accent to the chill fog of her breath, she repeated what she’d said to Van; “...not even significant.” She forced a laugh meant to be scornful. It tasted like acid and sounded worse.
* * * * *
Five minutes after Lila left him, Van had walked the few blocks to Edward Lawton’s parked car. He opened the passenger side and slid in. The
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