always wanted more. Maybe not more clothes and shoes, but something else, the something that neither of us ever had – a true family. And we both knew that it couldn’t be found inside Le Papillon . Regardless of what Kate said, friends could never replace small details that come from having a family, with the same flesh and blood you had.
“I think people always get what they deserve,” I said. “And what I have now was worth every single tear I cried while I was a prisoner of Paradise . I hope one day, you will find what you are looking for, Tess.”
“So does this mean you are happy to live all alone, work, study, and have no one to talk to when you actually need a talk?”
Oh, she always knew how to push the most painful buttons I had.
“I have everything I need.”
“Lucky you,” Tess said, disdain dripping from the words as they fell out of her mouth. She didn’t believe me. She seemed certain that my life was just as miserable now as it was when she and I still lived in the orphanage. I didn’t want to tell her she was wrong, but she was. My life was completely different now. It was better and I was much happier. . .even if I wasn’t able to spend more time with the man who was the reason for my happiness.
***
Monday had always been my favorite day of the week. Most people hated Mondays, but not me. For me, Mondays had always been associated with something new: new plans, new hopes, new achievements. Besides, I hoped every new day I spent without Will, was bringing me closer to being with him, not to mention the excitement I felt whenever I thought about seeing him again.
There was another part of my new life that I absolutely loved – Balero. My classes there were a dream come true for me. I didn’t care that I had to work really hard to be even half as good as the rest of the students; some, if not all of them, had been dancing their whole lives before they got accepted into the school. Other than the train station ‘shows’ I put on while I was in Paradise and the shows at Le Papillon, I had no formal training. Everything I knew about dancing came from reading books and watching TV shows. But my grades were good, really good, and my dancing got better every day.
Dancing was the one thing I wouldn't be able to live without. It helped keep me grounded, relieved stress, and took me away from my problems; when I was dancing, all of my thoughts washed away, and by the time a song was finished, I would feel much better, it was pure bliss amidst the chaos my life consisted of.
Apart from my own classes, I was also busy teaching Balero's students when they wanted extra practice or training. I didn’t expect my teacher, Mrs. Crumple, to offer me the position, but she said I was more than qualified for it; it really surprised me because I didn’t feel qualified enough to be teaching anyone. A lot of Balero’s students worked part-time as dance instructors. The school was one of the best in the city, and I was honored to be able to call myself its student.
I took a quick shower, got dressed and headed for the school. It was the beginning of December outside, a thin layer of snow covered the pavement under my feet. My thoughts traveled back to the time I lived in the orphanage. Winter was the worst time of the year for us – Paradise dwellers. We didn’t have enough warm clothes, and what we had could hardly be called clothes at all, it was almost like going out half-naked. We hated cold. But we didn’t have a choice but to live the life that Paradise offered us. That’s why every new day of my so-called freedom felt like a blessing to me, the biggest advantage of which was that I didn’t have to beg anymore.
As I approached the entrance to the school, I smiled. I turned my head toward the parking lot, and noticed, as always, that Christopher was parked in a space closest to the doors. And as always, he was inside, reading the morning paper, and drinking a cappuccino from a coffee
“I think people always get what they deserve,” I said. “And what I have now was worth every single tear I cried while I was a prisoner of Paradise . I hope one day, you will find what you are looking for, Tess.”
“So does this mean you are happy to live all alone, work, study, and have no one to talk to when you actually need a talk?”
Oh, she always knew how to push the most painful buttons I had.
“I have everything I need.”
“Lucky you,” Tess said, disdain dripping from the words as they fell out of her mouth. She didn’t believe me. She seemed certain that my life was just as miserable now as it was when she and I still lived in the orphanage. I didn’t want to tell her she was wrong, but she was. My life was completely different now. It was better and I was much happier. . .even if I wasn’t able to spend more time with the man who was the reason for my happiness.
***
Monday had always been my favorite day of the week. Most people hated Mondays, but not me. For me, Mondays had always been associated with something new: new plans, new hopes, new achievements. Besides, I hoped every new day I spent without Will, was bringing me closer to being with him, not to mention the excitement I felt whenever I thought about seeing him again.
There was another part of my new life that I absolutely loved – Balero. My classes there were a dream come true for me. I didn’t care that I had to work really hard to be even half as good as the rest of the students; some, if not all of them, had been dancing their whole lives before they got accepted into the school. Other than the train station ‘shows’ I put on while I was in Paradise and the shows at Le Papillon, I had no formal training. Everything I knew about dancing came from reading books and watching TV shows. But my grades were good, really good, and my dancing got better every day.
Dancing was the one thing I wouldn't be able to live without. It helped keep me grounded, relieved stress, and took me away from my problems; when I was dancing, all of my thoughts washed away, and by the time a song was finished, I would feel much better, it was pure bliss amidst the chaos my life consisted of.
Apart from my own classes, I was also busy teaching Balero's students when they wanted extra practice or training. I didn’t expect my teacher, Mrs. Crumple, to offer me the position, but she said I was more than qualified for it; it really surprised me because I didn’t feel qualified enough to be teaching anyone. A lot of Balero’s students worked part-time as dance instructors. The school was one of the best in the city, and I was honored to be able to call myself its student.
I took a quick shower, got dressed and headed for the school. It was the beginning of December outside, a thin layer of snow covered the pavement under my feet. My thoughts traveled back to the time I lived in the orphanage. Winter was the worst time of the year for us – Paradise dwellers. We didn’t have enough warm clothes, and what we had could hardly be called clothes at all, it was almost like going out half-naked. We hated cold. But we didn’t have a choice but to live the life that Paradise offered us. That’s why every new day of my so-called freedom felt like a blessing to me, the biggest advantage of which was that I didn’t have to beg anymore.
As I approached the entrance to the school, I smiled. I turned my head toward the parking lot, and noticed, as always, that Christopher was parked in a space closest to the doors. And as always, he was inside, reading the morning paper, and drinking a cappuccino from a coffee
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