realized it.
He clearly remembered the love he had felt for the animal, how he had talked to it and how he had groomed it; taking care of it had distracted him from the pain in his heart.
Then one day, his father had snatched the poor thing out of his small hands, stomped on it, and thrown it out. Jayden had cried, he had run after his father, he had even gone so far as to fall into the trash bin in his efforts to retrieve it, but it had been in vain. All it had gotten him was a thorough beating and a broken heart.
And now, this teddy bear looking back at him was an almost exact copy of the one he had lost. He was years older now, nineteen years of age, but there was still a small child inside him, and he wanted that bear!
His gaze was fixed on the window, not wavering at all. Bombs could’ve been dropped left and right and he wouldn’t have noticed. Time passed until….
“Here,” Matt’s gruff voice finally managed to get his attention. Jayden turned his head only to come face to face with his bear .
Jayden stared at the little thing, reaching for it, holding it up as if he were afraid it was going to turn into smoke and disappear, but when he found that after a few blinks it was still there, he carefully lifted his head to look at Matt.
Matt looked sheepish and totally uncomfortable, but there was a shy smile tugging at the edges of his mouth, and with a little shriek, Jayden threw himself at Matt, hugging him as if he had just met Santa Claus. He knew he was acting like a lunatic, but he couldn’t help it. This was the nicest thing anyone had done for him in a long time, probably ever, and it meant so much to him he momentarily lost all his words.
Matt had gone completely stiff underneath him, but eventually he relaxed marginally. Still, he didn’t return the hug, and when Jayden pulled away, it was Matt for once who looked uncomfortable and out of his element.
“Thank you,” Jayden said simply, and because he felt he needed to offer some sort of explanation, he added, “It looks just like the teddy bear my mother gave me before she died.” His voice faltered a bit before he said again, “Thank you.”
“Uhm…,” was all Matt said, awkwardly patting him on his back before continuing their walk as if nothing had happened at all.
But something had happened. Matt had done something for him out of the kindness of his heart. This wasn’t a gesture Jayden could easily brush off. There was more to Matt Archer than the man allowed to be seen, and Jayden would have loved to spend more time unraveling the mystery, peeling away layer after layer until he got to the core of Matt Archer’s soul.
He wasn’t deluding himself with ideas of Matt having suddenly fallen in love with him or that maybe their sham relationship could turn real. Regardless of what his heart wanted, his head was firmly planted in real life, and there was no way someone as handsome and rich as Matt would fall in love with someone like him .
But if Matt would come to care for him just a little bit, then Jayden would be able to walk away from this with fond memories and the knowledge that there was someone out there who, at least for a brief moment in time, had cared if he lived or died. It would sustain him in those moments when the loneliness got too heavy, bearing down to crush him. He could use it like a beacon, and maybe that made him pathetic, but Jayden had learned early on to make the most out of the things given to him.
It would’ve been an easy thing for him to try and calm his fluttering nerves by helping himself to one of the many cocktails served at the party, but Jayden resisted the temptation, choosing to have a clear head instead.
He looked the part of rich boyfriend; dressed in thin black cotton trousers and a sleeveless shirt, he matched everyone else when it came to looking elegant and effortlessly rich. On the inside, though, he was quaking. What if someone discovered he was a fraud?
“Nothing to
He clearly remembered the love he had felt for the animal, how he had talked to it and how he had groomed it; taking care of it had distracted him from the pain in his heart.
Then one day, his father had snatched the poor thing out of his small hands, stomped on it, and thrown it out. Jayden had cried, he had run after his father, he had even gone so far as to fall into the trash bin in his efforts to retrieve it, but it had been in vain. All it had gotten him was a thorough beating and a broken heart.
And now, this teddy bear looking back at him was an almost exact copy of the one he had lost. He was years older now, nineteen years of age, but there was still a small child inside him, and he wanted that bear!
His gaze was fixed on the window, not wavering at all. Bombs could’ve been dropped left and right and he wouldn’t have noticed. Time passed until….
“Here,” Matt’s gruff voice finally managed to get his attention. Jayden turned his head only to come face to face with his bear .
Jayden stared at the little thing, reaching for it, holding it up as if he were afraid it was going to turn into smoke and disappear, but when he found that after a few blinks it was still there, he carefully lifted his head to look at Matt.
Matt looked sheepish and totally uncomfortable, but there was a shy smile tugging at the edges of his mouth, and with a little shriek, Jayden threw himself at Matt, hugging him as if he had just met Santa Claus. He knew he was acting like a lunatic, but he couldn’t help it. This was the nicest thing anyone had done for him in a long time, probably ever, and it meant so much to him he momentarily lost all his words.
Matt had gone completely stiff underneath him, but eventually he relaxed marginally. Still, he didn’t return the hug, and when Jayden pulled away, it was Matt for once who looked uncomfortable and out of his element.
“Thank you,” Jayden said simply, and because he felt he needed to offer some sort of explanation, he added, “It looks just like the teddy bear my mother gave me before she died.” His voice faltered a bit before he said again, “Thank you.”
“Uhm…,” was all Matt said, awkwardly patting him on his back before continuing their walk as if nothing had happened at all.
But something had happened. Matt had done something for him out of the kindness of his heart. This wasn’t a gesture Jayden could easily brush off. There was more to Matt Archer than the man allowed to be seen, and Jayden would have loved to spend more time unraveling the mystery, peeling away layer after layer until he got to the core of Matt Archer’s soul.
He wasn’t deluding himself with ideas of Matt having suddenly fallen in love with him or that maybe their sham relationship could turn real. Regardless of what his heart wanted, his head was firmly planted in real life, and there was no way someone as handsome and rich as Matt would fall in love with someone like him .
But if Matt would come to care for him just a little bit, then Jayden would be able to walk away from this with fond memories and the knowledge that there was someone out there who, at least for a brief moment in time, had cared if he lived or died. It would sustain him in those moments when the loneliness got too heavy, bearing down to crush him. He could use it like a beacon, and maybe that made him pathetic, but Jayden had learned early on to make the most out of the things given to him.
It would’ve been an easy thing for him to try and calm his fluttering nerves by helping himself to one of the many cocktails served at the party, but Jayden resisted the temptation, choosing to have a clear head instead.
He looked the part of rich boyfriend; dressed in thin black cotton trousers and a sleeveless shirt, he matched everyone else when it came to looking elegant and effortlessly rich. On the inside, though, he was quaking. What if someone discovered he was a fraud?
“Nothing to
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