Love Me: Oakville Series:Book 5 by Kathy-Jo Reinhart Page B

like he believes I won’t get better. I’m all for hope, but there’s no hope for me. I’ve read so much research on this type of cancer, I know my days are limited, and no amount of chemo will fix it.
    Amber sets a steaming cup of coffee in front of me. I bring the mug up to my nose and inhale deeply in an attempt to calm my nerves a bit, but it doesn’t work. Worry gnaws at me. By the sullen looks they’re all already wearing, I know they aren’t going to take the news well. When they all look at me, I take a deep breath and tell them all the details.
    “How long will you be taking chemo or radiation to get rid of it?” Amber asks, as if chemo is the answer. Bile rises in my throat. I’m about to crush three women I love dearly.
    “The chemo is only going to give me a couple extra months. This cancer isn’t going away,” I say. A resounding gasp has me biting my lip in effort to keep from breaking down once more. Amber’s hand covers her mouth, Holly’s eyes immediately fill with tears, and Chelsie’s eyes widen, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. I tear at a napkin in front of me, reverting my eyes.
    “What do you mean?” Holly asks in a shaky voice, and I blow out a breath, looking back up. This is so much harder than I thought it would be.
    “This type of cancer is very aggressive and there’s nothing that will make it go away. I’m going to die,” I explain, and the pain on their faces mixed with the tears streaming down their cheeks is hard to take.
    “No,” Holly states, shaking her head. “I don’t buy it. There has to be something. We’ll find a specialist.” I reach over to grab her hand and give it a reassuring squeeze.
    “Believe me, I know this is hard to understand, but there is nothing that can be done.”
    “How long do you have?” Amber questions in a whisper, her cheeks reddening with embarrassment, but I don’t blame her. It was the first question that popped into my head as well.
    “Without any treatment...a month or two. With treatment, possibly four or five. They can’t really be sure,” I tell them. They all look completely devastated. Their eyes are wide and filling with tears. The smiles that typically grace their beautiful faces are gone, replaced with deep frowns. Within seconds, we are all openly bawling and wrapped in another group hug. How am I going to say goodbye to people I love so much? This whole thing sucks. It’s so unfair. I’m too young to die. There are so many things left for me to do, but I’ll never have near enough time to do any of it. The time I do have left will be spent with my body slowly deteriorating.
    We spend the next two hours with the girls promising to be here for anything I need and then trying to cheer me up. I force myself to smile and giggle when it’s expected, but deep inside, I’m crying and screaming. This is not how I envisioned my life turning out. The girls clean their mugs and start to round up their children. Angel and Chelsie take a very excited Chase home with them for the night, and for that, I’m grateful. I’m so damn tired of pretending I’m okay. It’ll be nice to have a little time to myself to just sit here and cry.
    When I close the door behind them, I fall back against it and let the tears fall. My cries echo throughout the house and eventually turn into screams as anger begins to sear through me. The tears slow and every muscle in my body tenses. Jumping up off the floor, I storm to the table, pick up a crystal vase that sits in the middle, and with a growl, I hurl it against the wall. Crystal shards spray across the entryway, catching the sunlight and causing them to sparkle as they fall to the floor. “That felt good,” I say to myself, reaching for something else to throw.

 
    I stayed with the guys a lot longer than I intended. It was difficult to leave them. They took the news of Taryn’s cancer harder than I thought they would. I could see them all thinking of what it would be like