didn’t.
When the bell rang signaling lunch time, Kaley didn’t have time to even stand before Harper was onto her.
“What’s with the dress? You look gorgeous.”
“You really think so? It was Mother Barbie’s idea. She thinks I dress too boring.”
“I agree with her.” Harper felt the fabric, it was soft and flowing, definitely something she approved of. She had been trying to get Kaley to wear dresses for years, just like her.
“It kind of feels weird though, this isn’t really me,” Kaley confessed. She knew that’s what she was going for, but it didn’t make it any more comfortable. At least while they lingered there talking, the rest of the class could filter out so she didn’t have to wonder whether they were looking at her as she walked.
“Maybe it’s a new you.” Harper smiled. “You do look really good. I’m sure Harvey would approve.”
“He’s already said he liked it. But it didn’t mean anything, he was just being nice and said it in passing.”
“Sure. Let’s get to lunch, I’m starving.”
They stood and headed for the cafeteria. They were at the end of the lunch rush, also at the end of the queue. They had to wait for seemingly ages before they reached the food.
Kaley chose a sandwich and a juice, her usual staple foods. She picked up her tray and started toward their usual table. It wasn’t that people left it for her and Harper specifically, just that nobody else wanted to sit there. It was next to the kitchen and nearly always too hot for comfort. The perfect place for the invisible people to sit.
As she walked, Kaley stopped suddenly to avoid the body passing in front of her. She looked up to see Eli only inches away from her. He was walking with a teammate, talking animatedly. Kaley didn’t move, she desperately wanted him to notice her in her red dress. Perhaps it would make him view her differently. Perhaps it would make him see her, full stop.
She could feel her heat beating in her chest, so hard it might jump through her dress. She wanted him to look her way, she imagined locking eyes with him and then seeing him smile. The world around them would stop and it would just be them standing there in the cafeteria. She desperately hoped for that moment, for even just a glimmer of hope that perhaps Eli and her actually had something.
But he kept walking. He didn’t stop for even a beat of his conversation with his friend. She was nothing but a red speck in his peripheral vision. If even that. For all he acknowledged, she didn’t even exist on the same planet as he did.
She skulked off to her table, hoping her burning face wasn’t as red as her dress. She felt humiliated, so embarrassed that she had dared to wish for Eli to look at her. She was so stupid for thinking he even knew she existed.
She scolded herself, wishing she could sink into the ground and never be seen again. Wearing the dress was a terrible idea, it wasn’t her and didn’t change anything. She was right, underneath she was still the same plain, invisible self.
She felt Harper sit beside her but she couldn’t look at her until she had composed herself. She didn’t need the third degree right now. Harper would probably guess what was upsetting her and ask a million questions about it to analyze it to the core. She put on a brave face and took a few breaths.
“So how was band practice this morning?” she asked, it was a relatively safe topic.
“It would have been better with you there.”
Okay, maybe it wasn’t so safe. “Did they tell you what song you’re going to be learning for the showcase concert?”
“They haven’t decided yet. They want to make sure everyone knows the basics so we have to cover nursery rhymes for a few weeks.” Harper rolled her eyes. She had been playing the violin in the school band since she was eight years old, she could play any of the basics in about any key chosen. “I hate it when newbie’s join.”
“I would have been a newbie,” Kaley
When the bell rang signaling lunch time, Kaley didn’t have time to even stand before Harper was onto her.
“What’s with the dress? You look gorgeous.”
“You really think so? It was Mother Barbie’s idea. She thinks I dress too boring.”
“I agree with her.” Harper felt the fabric, it was soft and flowing, definitely something she approved of. She had been trying to get Kaley to wear dresses for years, just like her.
“It kind of feels weird though, this isn’t really me,” Kaley confessed. She knew that’s what she was going for, but it didn’t make it any more comfortable. At least while they lingered there talking, the rest of the class could filter out so she didn’t have to wonder whether they were looking at her as she walked.
“Maybe it’s a new you.” Harper smiled. “You do look really good. I’m sure Harvey would approve.”
“He’s already said he liked it. But it didn’t mean anything, he was just being nice and said it in passing.”
“Sure. Let’s get to lunch, I’m starving.”
They stood and headed for the cafeteria. They were at the end of the lunch rush, also at the end of the queue. They had to wait for seemingly ages before they reached the food.
Kaley chose a sandwich and a juice, her usual staple foods. She picked up her tray and started toward their usual table. It wasn’t that people left it for her and Harper specifically, just that nobody else wanted to sit there. It was next to the kitchen and nearly always too hot for comfort. The perfect place for the invisible people to sit.
As she walked, Kaley stopped suddenly to avoid the body passing in front of her. She looked up to see Eli only inches away from her. He was walking with a teammate, talking animatedly. Kaley didn’t move, she desperately wanted him to notice her in her red dress. Perhaps it would make him view her differently. Perhaps it would make him see her, full stop.
She could feel her heat beating in her chest, so hard it might jump through her dress. She wanted him to look her way, she imagined locking eyes with him and then seeing him smile. The world around them would stop and it would just be them standing there in the cafeteria. She desperately hoped for that moment, for even just a glimmer of hope that perhaps Eli and her actually had something.
But he kept walking. He didn’t stop for even a beat of his conversation with his friend. She was nothing but a red speck in his peripheral vision. If even that. For all he acknowledged, she didn’t even exist on the same planet as he did.
She skulked off to her table, hoping her burning face wasn’t as red as her dress. She felt humiliated, so embarrassed that she had dared to wish for Eli to look at her. She was so stupid for thinking he even knew she existed.
She scolded herself, wishing she could sink into the ground and never be seen again. Wearing the dress was a terrible idea, it wasn’t her and didn’t change anything. She was right, underneath she was still the same plain, invisible self.
She felt Harper sit beside her but she couldn’t look at her until she had composed herself. She didn’t need the third degree right now. Harper would probably guess what was upsetting her and ask a million questions about it to analyze it to the core. She put on a brave face and took a few breaths.
“So how was band practice this morning?” she asked, it was a relatively safe topic.
“It would have been better with you there.”
Okay, maybe it wasn’t so safe. “Did they tell you what song you’re going to be learning for the showcase concert?”
“They haven’t decided yet. They want to make sure everyone knows the basics so we have to cover nursery rhymes for a few weeks.” Harper rolled her eyes. She had been playing the violin in the school band since she was eight years old, she could play any of the basics in about any key chosen. “I hate it when newbie’s join.”
“I would have been a newbie,” Kaley
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