personal goodness.’
‘Uh-huhhhh …’ He doesn’t have a clue what she’s on about but he’ll do anything for her, even go to Philosothon. She has great power over him …
Booby-Touching Power.
Y’see, Jack S told me what happened at the bush dance that night between him and Jarrell, what happened after I left there. He told me about it last week and he was pretty happy telling me – it was all his superhorny dreams and wishes come true. Reckons him and Jarrell went outside the assembly hall for a walk, they went out in the dark to the corner near the fence and had a kiss and started hugging and stuff and he told me that his hand went down her shoulder then across her front then down to her booby region. True dat, he touched her boob over her dress. He said it was just a fast touch, not even a grab, and he— BRNNNNNNNNNGGGG .
Happy the bell went because I don’t want to go through this story. Don’t want to think about Jarrell’s boobs for even a sec. I don’t care that he touched her boob, him and Jarrell can do whatever they like together, their biz, but I just don’t want to think about it. It’s wrong.
‘So Jack, I’ll meet you at 12:30 p.m. outside Portable C?’ Jarrell’s already up, she doesn’t like to be late for class, suckhead. She’s still holding Jack’s hand though.
‘Yeshhhhh.’
‘Say it once more before I go.’
‘Wha?’
‘Philosothon.’
‘Philos-o-fon.’
‘ADORABLE!’ She lets go of his hand, bloody FINALLY, then she nods at Ravo and says ‘Laterz’ in that arsey way she says goodbye. But she doesn’t say anything to me, just squints her eyes as she walks past.
Ravo gets up: ‘How am I going to get through the day wearing these big pants with this stain on the back?’
‘You can hardly see it, Ravo,’ I tell him.
Jack S leans in again to see his bum: ‘You kind of can.’
‘Don’t listen to him, Ravo, just claim the stain.’
‘Yeah, claim the stain,’ he says, but he’s not really listening. He’s looking over to the assembly hall wall, trying to see if Brisley is there with the HAGZ but it’s too far away.
He shakes his head and says something to himself that I can’t hear. And off he goes toward B Block, everyone round him stopping to have a look at his pants, laughing and dissing him.
Oiiiii, forgot to wipe your arse, mate / Classic haw haw
The usual bitchy stuff. It wouldn’t be so bad except those were Year 7 girls.
Hello there, Mr Ravenscroft, have you lost your circus?
That was Mr Ooi the maths teacher on playground duty. Ravo keeps walking, claiming the stain.
‘C’mon Zurb, we got Science.’
Jack S is standing and waiting for me but I don’t get up.
‘C’mon.’
I’m not going to answer. Gonna keep him standing there. Look at that face, what does she like about him?
‘C’mon, ya coming?’
‘Yeah whatevs.’
10:55 a.m .
Third period: Science
This is one of the most important physics formulas in the universe and I just made it up right now. I have written it on the top of my exercise book with black pen.
I will call it …
Zurbo’s Very Famous Theory of Bushing
As shown below in Fig#1: if you are walking past a bush (B), then the net force of a hand (H) applied to a person (P), divided by the size of the bush (B) equals A (arse) over T (tit).
Physics is a mammothly yawny subject and we are doing it for the rest of the term so the only way I can survive is make up stupid physics formulas for fun so I don’t go mad because I don’t know what this lame-o teacher is talking about. He is an emergency teacher who just started with us: not even sure what his name is, just a yawny kind of name like Brown or Bennett or Brady or something boring like that, and he’s got a yawny voice that just goes on and on in one lonnnnnnnnnng yawnnnnnny wayyyyyyy …
sooooooo Newtonnnnn’s third lawwwwww essentially sayyyyyys every action hassssss an equal and opposite reeeeeeeeeaction
‘Getting any of this, Zurb?’
Jack
‘Uh-huhhhh …’ He doesn’t have a clue what she’s on about but he’ll do anything for her, even go to Philosothon. She has great power over him …
Booby-Touching Power.
Y’see, Jack S told me what happened at the bush dance that night between him and Jarrell, what happened after I left there. He told me about it last week and he was pretty happy telling me – it was all his superhorny dreams and wishes come true. Reckons him and Jarrell went outside the assembly hall for a walk, they went out in the dark to the corner near the fence and had a kiss and started hugging and stuff and he told me that his hand went down her shoulder then across her front then down to her booby region. True dat, he touched her boob over her dress. He said it was just a fast touch, not even a grab, and he— BRNNNNNNNNNGGGG .
Happy the bell went because I don’t want to go through this story. Don’t want to think about Jarrell’s boobs for even a sec. I don’t care that he touched her boob, him and Jarrell can do whatever they like together, their biz, but I just don’t want to think about it. It’s wrong.
‘So Jack, I’ll meet you at 12:30 p.m. outside Portable C?’ Jarrell’s already up, she doesn’t like to be late for class, suckhead. She’s still holding Jack’s hand though.
‘Yeshhhhh.’
‘Say it once more before I go.’
‘Wha?’
‘Philosothon.’
‘Philos-o-fon.’
‘ADORABLE!’ She lets go of his hand, bloody FINALLY, then she nods at Ravo and says ‘Laterz’ in that arsey way she says goodbye. But she doesn’t say anything to me, just squints her eyes as she walks past.
Ravo gets up: ‘How am I going to get through the day wearing these big pants with this stain on the back?’
‘You can hardly see it, Ravo,’ I tell him.
Jack S leans in again to see his bum: ‘You kind of can.’
‘Don’t listen to him, Ravo, just claim the stain.’
‘Yeah, claim the stain,’ he says, but he’s not really listening. He’s looking over to the assembly hall wall, trying to see if Brisley is there with the HAGZ but it’s too far away.
He shakes his head and says something to himself that I can’t hear. And off he goes toward B Block, everyone round him stopping to have a look at his pants, laughing and dissing him.
Oiiiii, forgot to wipe your arse, mate / Classic haw haw
The usual bitchy stuff. It wouldn’t be so bad except those were Year 7 girls.
Hello there, Mr Ravenscroft, have you lost your circus?
That was Mr Ooi the maths teacher on playground duty. Ravo keeps walking, claiming the stain.
‘C’mon Zurb, we got Science.’
Jack S is standing and waiting for me but I don’t get up.
‘C’mon.’
I’m not going to answer. Gonna keep him standing there. Look at that face, what does she like about him?
‘C’mon, ya coming?’
‘Yeah whatevs.’
10:55 a.m .
Third period: Science
This is one of the most important physics formulas in the universe and I just made it up right now. I have written it on the top of my exercise book with black pen.
I will call it …
Zurbo’s Very Famous Theory of Bushing
As shown below in Fig#1: if you are walking past a bush (B), then the net force of a hand (H) applied to a person (P), divided by the size of the bush (B) equals A (arse) over T (tit).
Physics is a mammothly yawny subject and we are doing it for the rest of the term so the only way I can survive is make up stupid physics formulas for fun so I don’t go mad because I don’t know what this lame-o teacher is talking about. He is an emergency teacher who just started with us: not even sure what his name is, just a yawny kind of name like Brown or Bennett or Brady or something boring like that, and he’s got a yawny voice that just goes on and on in one lonnnnnnnnnng yawnnnnnny wayyyyyyy …
sooooooo Newtonnnnn’s third lawwwwww essentially sayyyyyys every action hassssss an equal and opposite reeeeeeeeeaction
‘Getting any of this, Zurb?’
Jack
Similar Books
