Never Understand Part One ( Johnthen Trent Adult Romance 1) by Miranda Mailer Page B

so outlandish that I think at first he’s come as a pirate – I mean it’s one hundred percent Vegas, maybe a doorman at Treasure Island Hotel. Not surprisingly, conversation between them is strained. Some sadistic streak in me decides to strain it further.
    ‘So, what do you think of Chomsky,’ I say to Pirate Boy. It’s mean, I know. I look at him expectantly, but to his credit he opens his mouth to reply, like an ornamental goldfish racking its one-second memory. It’s a champagne moment, so I take another sip, looking enquiringly at him over the glass.
    Sadly, we are interrupted. Josh Lake. Joshua-fucking-Lake, money and sex robot, screwing things up for me again.
    ‘Hey, Jana. So have you… reconsidered the handcuffs yet?’ Josh wears an arch smile, and a wolfish look in his eye. Like he’s sooo cool, and I’m sooo embarrassed, but attracted to him as well, of course. Another time it would be cute, or funny. Right now, he’s just a conceited jerk, and he’s come to deliberately embarrass me. Which, weirdly, means he still wants me – if I’m not mistaken?
    My mind is still whirring with that odd thought when the reply escapes my mouth. ‘Handcuffs? To symbolize repression?’ I act like he’s made the crassest suggestion. In fact I’m amazed at my slick riposte. Must be the pain from my shoes, sobering me up. ‘Don’t you think that’s a bit facile, Josh? Even for you?’
    Lawyer Girl smiles at me as if to say, You go girl .
    ‘Ha, yeah! It’s not like it’s a fancy dress contest,’ says Pirate Boy, glad to change subject from Chomsky. I practically wet myself trying not to laugh. Fancy dress? Did the guy in the pirate costume just say that? I catch the eye of Lawyer Girl and we both bite our lips to resist the snigger. Josh can think of nothing, which is just as it should be. He turns away slightly, as if he’s not with us, as if he never took part in the exchange, but I feel his tall presence by my side, and I determine not to look round. He’ll be back with some smart quip. He’ll get his own back, and I’d better be ready.
    ‘You were saying about Chomsky,’ says Lawyer Woman to me with a sparkle in her eye. OK, it was naughty of me to throw that one at Pirate Boy, but now she’s called my bluff, and it’s my turn to avoid the goldfish look and talk about Chomsky. I begin to laugh, which is all I can do, but help is at hand.
    ‘His politics, or his theories of linguistics?’ pipes up Jack Sparrow Jnr.
    ‘Err… linguistics,’ I say, and I burst out laughing, assuming Pirate Boy knows as little as me about Chomsky.
    I’m still laughing, but then, ouch! OUCH! That bastard Josh just pinched my butt, hard. Asshole. I’m determined not to make a scene, because that’s exactly what he wants. He wants me to lose it, after who knows how many glasses of champagne, and he’ll deny he touched me, and I’ll make an idiot of myself.
    I’m not going to rise to it. I’ve got to be cool, and I am an actress after all.
    But I can’t do nothing. I calmly swap my champagne glass to the other hand, and take my time. My toes are killing me by now in these shoes, and I channel the anger. There’s a waft of Josh’s aftershave. My free hand finds Josh’s butt to my right and gives it a good hard pinch. Mmm... his butt feels so fine, I have to admit. Better than I remember. Tight and firm. Muscular. I feel a flipping sensation in my belly in spite of myself.
    Relax, Jana, I repeat to myself. Ignore him. Josh is an asshole. He is an asshole. I take a drink of champagne and turn away from him, only to see Josh’s back disappearing into the crowd in the other direction. Shit, shit, shit! Josh just pinched my butt and then walked off – that’s why I smelled a waft of his aftershave as he walked behind me. I’ve just pinched some other guy’s butt. Definitely not Josh Lake’s.
    Everything happens in slow-mo. I turn back in that over-controlled way that only the inebriated can master, and find