without its cap. That meant a dried out stick of uselessness. Why am I staring at Chapstick? Why is this the thing I’ll remember when I think back to this moment? The moment my heart crushed in on itself. I couldn’t breathe. Somewhere in this crazy train of thought, I stopped breathing.
My gut. It sucker punched my gut. My gut hurt.
“Hello? Hello?”
He was speaking again, trying to get my attention. How long have I been silent?
“You’re a what?” I croaked out.
“I’m a vamp. My father was a vampire. My mother was human. I was born a hybrid. I grew up with my mother. I’m just like you. Only…different.”
“No, you’re not just like me. You’re a vamp. You’re a different species. It doesn’t get anymore unlike me.”
“I know this is a shock-”
“No, this is more than just shock.” My anger replaced my surprise and my voice grew stronger with the new emotion flooding me. “I knew I shouldn’t have trusted you. I should’ve listened to my gut on day one.”
“Your gut told you to talk to me. I was there. You had the same spark I did.”
My face burned at his observation. “I did not,” I lied. “I hadn’t heard a voice in years and I was desperate. But I’m not that desperate that I’m going to sit here and get tricked by a vamp!”
“I’m not tricking you!”
“I can’t even stand to hear your voice right now.”
What I said must have struck a nerve with him because he spoke his next words in low, worried tones. “Please. I get it, okay? You feel betrayed and I’m sorry. You have every right to be mad at me. Just…feel what you need to. When the anger fades, just think about all the things we talked about. All that was me. Our conversations meant something to me. Don’t just shut me out. Please.”
I sat woodenly on the couch. My hand still pressed the phone to my ear but I felt like I was about to drop it any second. His words kept slicing through me. He forced a divide in me that felt like it was going to rip through my skin. The guy I had been smitten over now had to compete with the realization that he was one of them . I felt sick.
“I have to go,” I said flatly.
“Will you call me tomorrow?” His voice was a plea.
“No, I won’t call you tomorrow. I wouldn’t talk to you if you were the last vampire on earth. And that’s not a fucking figure of speech.”
“Wow. Seriously?”
“Seriously. I’m not dialing this number again.”
And I hung up.
Chapter 15
Her
I had the rest of my miserable, lonely life to be mad. The anger was potent and magnified by the fact that I had no one to display it to.
“Of course he’s a vamp!” I screamed at an innocent crow. The stupid bird sat perched on the power line and cocked a confused head at me. That only made me madder. “I spent every day alone and when I finally find signs of intelligent life, it’s a VAMP!”
More head cocking.
I couldn’t reach the crow that questioned my right to be angry so I turned my rage onto a car. A full out, Carrie Underwood, baseball bat scene played out on a white Toyota Scion until I was heaving and sweaty, and my dogs had run for the hills to ride out my outbursts in safety.
Once I drained all the fury out of me, the desperate need to be productive came next.
I threw myself into my tasks. Since studying was out (my anger turned my concentration into a frayed, red haze) I focused on my cottage. More and more of the improvements I made to the area made it the picture of The Before. It breathed with life.
I checked my garden and frowned. The tomatoes were fine. I was still losing cabbage. I poked the green tarp that tempered the Arizona heat. So help me, I was going to bend this desert air into something that sprouted my plots into vegetable Chia pets.
After resetting the tent to a new angle and adding fresh soil, I took a can of paint to the side of the cottage. Teal. Made for little girls’ rooms or accent walls in trendy home designs
My gut. It sucker punched my gut. My gut hurt.
“Hello? Hello?”
He was speaking again, trying to get my attention. How long have I been silent?
“You’re a what?” I croaked out.
“I’m a vamp. My father was a vampire. My mother was human. I was born a hybrid. I grew up with my mother. I’m just like you. Only…different.”
“No, you’re not just like me. You’re a vamp. You’re a different species. It doesn’t get anymore unlike me.”
“I know this is a shock-”
“No, this is more than just shock.” My anger replaced my surprise and my voice grew stronger with the new emotion flooding me. “I knew I shouldn’t have trusted you. I should’ve listened to my gut on day one.”
“Your gut told you to talk to me. I was there. You had the same spark I did.”
My face burned at his observation. “I did not,” I lied. “I hadn’t heard a voice in years and I was desperate. But I’m not that desperate that I’m going to sit here and get tricked by a vamp!”
“I’m not tricking you!”
“I can’t even stand to hear your voice right now.”
What I said must have struck a nerve with him because he spoke his next words in low, worried tones. “Please. I get it, okay? You feel betrayed and I’m sorry. You have every right to be mad at me. Just…feel what you need to. When the anger fades, just think about all the things we talked about. All that was me. Our conversations meant something to me. Don’t just shut me out. Please.”
I sat woodenly on the couch. My hand still pressed the phone to my ear but I felt like I was about to drop it any second. His words kept slicing through me. He forced a divide in me that felt like it was going to rip through my skin. The guy I had been smitten over now had to compete with the realization that he was one of them . I felt sick.
“I have to go,” I said flatly.
“Will you call me tomorrow?” His voice was a plea.
“No, I won’t call you tomorrow. I wouldn’t talk to you if you were the last vampire on earth. And that’s not a fucking figure of speech.”
“Wow. Seriously?”
“Seriously. I’m not dialing this number again.”
And I hung up.
Chapter 15
Her
I had the rest of my miserable, lonely life to be mad. The anger was potent and magnified by the fact that I had no one to display it to.
“Of course he’s a vamp!” I screamed at an innocent crow. The stupid bird sat perched on the power line and cocked a confused head at me. That only made me madder. “I spent every day alone and when I finally find signs of intelligent life, it’s a VAMP!”
More head cocking.
I couldn’t reach the crow that questioned my right to be angry so I turned my rage onto a car. A full out, Carrie Underwood, baseball bat scene played out on a white Toyota Scion until I was heaving and sweaty, and my dogs had run for the hills to ride out my outbursts in safety.
Once I drained all the fury out of me, the desperate need to be productive came next.
I threw myself into my tasks. Since studying was out (my anger turned my concentration into a frayed, red haze) I focused on my cottage. More and more of the improvements I made to the area made it the picture of The Before. It breathed with life.
I checked my garden and frowned. The tomatoes were fine. I was still losing cabbage. I poked the green tarp that tempered the Arizona heat. So help me, I was going to bend this desert air into something that sprouted my plots into vegetable Chia pets.
After resetting the tent to a new angle and adding fresh soil, I took a can of paint to the side of the cottage. Teal. Made for little girls’ rooms or accent walls in trendy home designs
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