the machine. She pulled back her shoulders, focusing once again on the task at hand.
My entire world came to a slamming halt.
A flurry of intense memories of a girl I knew came back with a vengeance as I stared at her olive skin. I gripped the sheets in my fists, hoping it would center me as a tremor started in my core.
The years had made her face and body more womanly, soft and curvy in all the right places. She was even more beautiful than I could have ever dreamed. My perfect type. My Sasha.
It had to be her.
It couldn’t be her.
My mind scrambled with possibilities as a train-wreck of emotions swirled inside my exhausted body.
The tightness in my throat threatened to choke me out as I tried to speak. I swallowed past the scratch, coughing suddenly.
She flinched at the sound and our eyes met for the first time. She let out a small breath and my stomach twisted with hope. This was my chance.
Her eyes lingered then dropped from my face. Dismissing me, she turned away.
She didn’t know me. She didn't remember.
My chest tightened and I inhaled sharply, rubbing my palm over the physical pain being near her caused. I closed my eyes, trying to fight the worthlessness washing over me.
Why would she want to remember me? Our time together was nothing more than a horrible memory for her. I’d been a weak, stupid boy who’d chosen his own fears and insecurities over her.
I blinked rapidly, trying to clear out the hazy edges of my vision.
“Are you having pain? I can get you something stronger than what’s ordered already.”
I couldn’t drag my eyes from her beautiful face. She stood with her hands on her hips, fingers digging in. I also couldn't trust myself to speak, so I just shook my head.
“Fine,” her tone terse as she walked around my bed. “If you change your mind, push the button”
I fought everything inside of me screaming to pull her into the bed and wrap my arms protectively around her. I’d whisper all of the promises I’d made before except this time, beg for a second chance to prove to her I’d finally become the fucking man she deserved.
My heart ached, knowing in front of me stood everything my life had been built on. All of these years longing for what she had made me feel so easily.
When she’d given herself to me, she’d done more than gift me with her innocence, she’d made me feel strong for the first time. She’d believed I was capable of taking care of her. That I could protect her.
No one had ever thought of me as more than a throwaway. I was discarded like trash by everyone…everyone except her.
I’d done so many twisted things in my life to get to where I was now. If I could just touch her once, it would make all the wrong I’d done in my life fade away.
But I was too afraid to move; suddenly I was a boy again, terrified and inadequate.
My mind began to spin. I was so weak, so tired.
Maybe she was a dream.
Maybe this was all a dream.
Maybe I was dying.
Had whoever was in charge of death taken pity on me and replaced all the emptiness and fear with this? A vision of the only purity I’d ever known. Could I be lucky enough to pass into the next life with her as my last memory?
I struggled to figure this all out before she was gone. I wanted to hear her voice again, feel her touch.
And then it became very clear.
Yes.
This was my death…in one way or another.
It was exactly the kind of painful ending I deserved. The great above hadn’t blessed me with serenity. Instead, he would torture me with her closeness. Leaving me with a vision of the one thing I’d wanted my entire life but would never have.
This may not be the type of death where I was buried six feet under, but the placing of a seed in my mind. The teasing of my soul. A haunting of my spirit that would follow me the rest of my life. She would never be mine.
I suddenly felt on fire as possessiveness fueled my body. I wouldn't lose her again.
“Sasha?”
Her eyes flashed to mine but moved to the
My entire world came to a slamming halt.
A flurry of intense memories of a girl I knew came back with a vengeance as I stared at her olive skin. I gripped the sheets in my fists, hoping it would center me as a tremor started in my core.
The years had made her face and body more womanly, soft and curvy in all the right places. She was even more beautiful than I could have ever dreamed. My perfect type. My Sasha.
It had to be her.
It couldn’t be her.
My mind scrambled with possibilities as a train-wreck of emotions swirled inside my exhausted body.
The tightness in my throat threatened to choke me out as I tried to speak. I swallowed past the scratch, coughing suddenly.
She flinched at the sound and our eyes met for the first time. She let out a small breath and my stomach twisted with hope. This was my chance.
Her eyes lingered then dropped from my face. Dismissing me, she turned away.
She didn’t know me. She didn't remember.
My chest tightened and I inhaled sharply, rubbing my palm over the physical pain being near her caused. I closed my eyes, trying to fight the worthlessness washing over me.
Why would she want to remember me? Our time together was nothing more than a horrible memory for her. I’d been a weak, stupid boy who’d chosen his own fears and insecurities over her.
I blinked rapidly, trying to clear out the hazy edges of my vision.
“Are you having pain? I can get you something stronger than what’s ordered already.”
I couldn’t drag my eyes from her beautiful face. She stood with her hands on her hips, fingers digging in. I also couldn't trust myself to speak, so I just shook my head.
“Fine,” her tone terse as she walked around my bed. “If you change your mind, push the button”
I fought everything inside of me screaming to pull her into the bed and wrap my arms protectively around her. I’d whisper all of the promises I’d made before except this time, beg for a second chance to prove to her I’d finally become the fucking man she deserved.
My heart ached, knowing in front of me stood everything my life had been built on. All of these years longing for what she had made me feel so easily.
When she’d given herself to me, she’d done more than gift me with her innocence, she’d made me feel strong for the first time. She’d believed I was capable of taking care of her. That I could protect her.
No one had ever thought of me as more than a throwaway. I was discarded like trash by everyone…everyone except her.
I’d done so many twisted things in my life to get to where I was now. If I could just touch her once, it would make all the wrong I’d done in my life fade away.
But I was too afraid to move; suddenly I was a boy again, terrified and inadequate.
My mind began to spin. I was so weak, so tired.
Maybe she was a dream.
Maybe this was all a dream.
Maybe I was dying.
Had whoever was in charge of death taken pity on me and replaced all the emptiness and fear with this? A vision of the only purity I’d ever known. Could I be lucky enough to pass into the next life with her as my last memory?
I struggled to figure this all out before she was gone. I wanted to hear her voice again, feel her touch.
And then it became very clear.
Yes.
This was my death…in one way or another.
It was exactly the kind of painful ending I deserved. The great above hadn’t blessed me with serenity. Instead, he would torture me with her closeness. Leaving me with a vision of the one thing I’d wanted my entire life but would never have.
This may not be the type of death where I was buried six feet under, but the placing of a seed in my mind. The teasing of my soul. A haunting of my spirit that would follow me the rest of my life. She would never be mine.
I suddenly felt on fire as possessiveness fueled my body. I wouldn't lose her again.
“Sasha?”
Her eyes flashed to mine but moved to the
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