middle of jelly-filled donuts. But in Remarkable, jelly was remarkably important, and it was remarkably important because it was the source of one of Remarkable’s most vexing problems.
The problem wasn’t with Remarkable’s locally produced jelly. Remarkable’s Finest Jelly came from organic fruit grown in a picturesque orchard at the edge of town that was watered with the pure, natural spring water that bubbled up delightfully from Remarkable Springs. The fruit was picked at the peak ofits freshness, and then cooked by renowned celebrity jelly chef Caspar Snikerdeski Despartie in his own kitchen using a secret recipe handed down through his family for generations.
Once the jelly had finished cooking, it was packed lovingly into handblown glass jars, and these jars were decorated with a single silver ribbon tied in a perfect bow. The jelly was a lovely color, had a marvelously smooth texture, and a taste so delicate that it almost didn’t taste like jelly at all.
The jelly made in the nearby town of Munch, on the other hand, was made in a huge jelly factory out of concentrated, processed, conventionally grown fruits of dubious origin. This dubious fruit was smashed into an even more dubious goo by a large machine, and then filled with sugar, preservatives, artificial colors, and fillers. Then, another big machine glurped it into plain plastic jelly jars, and the jars were sent off to supermarkets all over the country to be sold very cheaply.
The jelly from Munch was lumpy, had a horrible fluorescent color, and smelled like artificial flavorings. But the jelly had one quality that the people from Remarkable never could explain. For all of its artificialityand its careless mass production, the jelly from Munch tasted wonderful. It tasted so good, in fact, that many people secretly wondered if it wasn’t almost nearly as good as the jelly made in Remarkable.
No one would admit this out loud, of course. It was a matter of civic pride. But every now and then someone from Remarkable would pick up a jar at the store and bring it home to eat. If anyone asked about it, they made up some excuse or another—like “Oh, they were out of Remarkable’s Finest Jelly at the store today. I had to get this instead,” or “Oh, I must have knocked this into my shopping cart by mistake,” or “Oh, I accidentally won it as a consolation prize in a candlepin bowling contest.” But of course, whoever bought the jar of jelly would gobble up every last bite just as soon as no one was watching.
The fact that the people of Remarkable couldn’t admit to liking jelly from Munch as a point of civic pride wasn’t good for Munch’s civic pride at all. The people who lived in Munch worked very hard in their jelly factory, and it bothered them that everyone from Remarkable acted like their jelly wasn’t good enough to eat, even though they secretly ate gallons of it.
To make matters worse, the town of Remarkablehad managed to acquire something that the town of Munch wanted very badly—and that was a good dentist. Many of the townspeople there had terrible teeth, which wasn’t surprising, given that the fumes from the jelly factory were so sweet that breathing the air in Munch was like inhaling sugar.
The people of Munch had been planning to offer Dr. Pike a position as the town’s dentist, but Mayor Doe had gotten to her first. It was frustrating, but Mayor Kate Chu, the mayor of Munch, was a fair-minded person and recognized that it was her own fault for not asking Dr. Pike sooner. Still, she didn’t see why Remarkable needed the best dentist in the country when it barely needed a dentist at all.
Unfortunately, no one had ever bothered to explain the long and bitter jelly rivalry to Captain Rojo Herring. And because the pirate didn’t know about it, he had no idea how much trouble he was about to cause when he dialed the toll-free number for the Munch Jelly Factory and asked if he could have an entire truckload of jelly
The problem wasn’t with Remarkable’s locally produced jelly. Remarkable’s Finest Jelly came from organic fruit grown in a picturesque orchard at the edge of town that was watered with the pure, natural spring water that bubbled up delightfully from Remarkable Springs. The fruit was picked at the peak ofits freshness, and then cooked by renowned celebrity jelly chef Caspar Snikerdeski Despartie in his own kitchen using a secret recipe handed down through his family for generations.
Once the jelly had finished cooking, it was packed lovingly into handblown glass jars, and these jars were decorated with a single silver ribbon tied in a perfect bow. The jelly was a lovely color, had a marvelously smooth texture, and a taste so delicate that it almost didn’t taste like jelly at all.
The jelly made in the nearby town of Munch, on the other hand, was made in a huge jelly factory out of concentrated, processed, conventionally grown fruits of dubious origin. This dubious fruit was smashed into an even more dubious goo by a large machine, and then filled with sugar, preservatives, artificial colors, and fillers. Then, another big machine glurped it into plain plastic jelly jars, and the jars were sent off to supermarkets all over the country to be sold very cheaply.
The jelly from Munch was lumpy, had a horrible fluorescent color, and smelled like artificial flavorings. But the jelly had one quality that the people from Remarkable never could explain. For all of its artificialityand its careless mass production, the jelly from Munch tasted wonderful. It tasted so good, in fact, that many people secretly wondered if it wasn’t almost nearly as good as the jelly made in Remarkable.
No one would admit this out loud, of course. It was a matter of civic pride. But every now and then someone from Remarkable would pick up a jar at the store and bring it home to eat. If anyone asked about it, they made up some excuse or another—like “Oh, they were out of Remarkable’s Finest Jelly at the store today. I had to get this instead,” or “Oh, I must have knocked this into my shopping cart by mistake,” or “Oh, I accidentally won it as a consolation prize in a candlepin bowling contest.” But of course, whoever bought the jar of jelly would gobble up every last bite just as soon as no one was watching.
The fact that the people of Remarkable couldn’t admit to liking jelly from Munch as a point of civic pride wasn’t good for Munch’s civic pride at all. The people who lived in Munch worked very hard in their jelly factory, and it bothered them that everyone from Remarkable acted like their jelly wasn’t good enough to eat, even though they secretly ate gallons of it.
To make matters worse, the town of Remarkablehad managed to acquire something that the town of Munch wanted very badly—and that was a good dentist. Many of the townspeople there had terrible teeth, which wasn’t surprising, given that the fumes from the jelly factory were so sweet that breathing the air in Munch was like inhaling sugar.
The people of Munch had been planning to offer Dr. Pike a position as the town’s dentist, but Mayor Doe had gotten to her first. It was frustrating, but Mayor Kate Chu, the mayor of Munch, was a fair-minded person and recognized that it was her own fault for not asking Dr. Pike sooner. Still, she didn’t see why Remarkable needed the best dentist in the country when it barely needed a dentist at all.
Unfortunately, no one had ever bothered to explain the long and bitter jelly rivalry to Captain Rojo Herring. And because the pirate didn’t know about it, he had no idea how much trouble he was about to cause when he dialed the toll-free number for the Munch Jelly Factory and asked if he could have an entire truckload of jelly
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