River of Lies by Sammy King Page B

days, and was suddenly ravenous. As I sat scoffing my food, Dylan came into the kitchen behind me, he ran his hand across my back, and rested it on my shoulder. I shrugged his hand off with irritation, not looking at him.  I wasn’t in the mood to deal with the emotions that the previous days had brought with them.  I heard Tilly come into the kitchen behind me, and kiss Dylan sloppily, with sleepy sexual giggles. 
    I shoved the food in my mouth violently, chewing loudly, to try and drown out the sound of their slobbering kisses.  They were still kissing when I stood up, and took my bowl to the sink. I shoved past them, and slammed my bowl into the empty tub, clenching my teeth tight, to stop the anger that was beginning to rise up.  Tilly completely ignored me and continued to kiss Dylan’s lips, but I could see Dylan watching me. As I walked from the room, I put my hand behind my back and stuck my middle finger up at him. I slammed my bedroom door hard enough to rattle the window, behind me. I knew I was being immature to feel so angry, after all Dylan, was Tilly’s boyfriend, and I was just his quick fuck on the side. But I had believed him when he told me he loved me. It had twisted every emotion and feeling I had inside me. I felt betrayed, but that just made me angry, because I had no right to feel that way. I wanted to scream and punch something, possibly even Dylan in the face, but I knew breaking my fist wasn’t going to fix the situation. So instead I threw myself onto my bed and buried my face in my pillow, biting into and screaming through clenched teeth.
    It wasn’t long before the knock on the door came.  I sat on my bed with a sigh expecting to see Dylan’s face peer around the open door, it wasn’t Dylan, but my dad.  He poked his head around the corner tentatively, he looked unsure of whether he should come in. It occurred to me that he probably felt confused by what was going on as much as I did.  It appeared to me that he was trying to make an effort. But none of this revelation did anything to shift the anger that swelled up inside me.
    “Mon” he said has he sat down on the end of my bed.
    I rubbed my face, and could feel my breakfast dance in my stomach, as it threatened to come back up in a violent angry manner.
    “I rang Dylan. I lost your mum, I can’t lose you too” he said bluntly. “When I told him what Tilly said to you, he agreed to come back to her”
    I nodded; Tilly’s threats of death rang in my ears. I knew she probably would kill me, but she could hurt me, which made me think of the possibility of being pregnant. I groaned as I lay back on my bed.
    “I know” I said, as the tears once again began to flow. I was getting fed up with the tears; they just seemed to always come now.
    Dad reached over to me and pulled me to take me in his arms, he smoothed my hair.  Again I began to feel comfort in my dad’s embrace; I didn’t feel the repulsion I had previously. I felt that Dylan had betrayed me that his words of love meant nothing, and in that moment I felt stupid and resolved that I wouldn’t have anything more to do with him. Although I knew that he was doing it to protect me that feeling of betrayal was something I couldn’t shake.
    Dad and I sat in my room, talking for the next couple of hours, we talked about mum, about what dad’s plans were, what my dreams were. There wasn’t a subject that we didn’t cover.  And for that brief time, with my dad, I could see the change, I could feel the change, and I felt like this man, my dad who I had grown to hate, might actually be the one man who would make a difference for the positive in my life.
    “I’ve got to go out for a bit, but I’ll be back a little later and we will talk more” he said as he lightly pat my hand.
    “Can I come with you?”
    “No Mon, it’s not something I want you to be involved in” I sighed with disappointment as the crashing revelation revealed itself, he hadn’t changed, he was