only half the reason why I have persisted with you.”
“Okay. Go on.”
“The other reason is because of dad. When he was diagnosed with Stage Three colon cancer a year ago, there was only a 53% chance the chemotherapy would kill it. That half-assed percentage really put a lot of things in perspective.”
Dylan wavers, glancing down briefly before locking his eyes back on mine.
“Colon cancer? That’s cancer of the large intestine right?”
“Yeah, it’s not nice. Unfortunately when the doctors found it, it was already in the C stage, which it means it had grown beyond the muscular layer of the bowel wall to the lymph nodes. It’s complicated to explain but so far he’s been responding to the treatment well.”
“Gosh. Poor Tony. He must be terrified.”
“A little, but you know my father, he’s always been headstrong. But getting back to what I was saying before, Ella. The truth is, I don’t know if I would have had the guts to walk into your bookstore a couple of weeks ago if dad hadn’t gotten sick.”
I stare at him, a little puzzled by what he means. “I’m sorry. I’m not sure I understand what you mean.”
“What I’m trying to say is that before that moment, before that day when I thought I might lose my Dad, I didn’t know what was important. I had a vague idea of what I wanted. But I had no plans to actually act on it. But then when that moment came it all suddenly made sense. Do you know what I decided to do in the end?”
“To get a stellar job at Preston & Smith and a swanky new apartment?” I joke.
Dylan laughs but I can tell he wants me to be serious.
“No, something even more important than that.”
I want to say that he decided he wanted me, but I want to hear him say it first.
I want to hear the meaning in his voice.
I want to hear the words that I have romanticized about him saying for ten years.
“Please tell me,” I answer softly.
Dylan looks at me closely, entwining his hands in mine.
“I decided that above everything. Above my career, above owning this apartment, above any amount of money I could ever earn, the one thing that I could not live without, at least not without trying to get…is you. I vowed that if you ever gave me another chance I wouldn’t waste it again, Ella. And I mean that.”
I feel like this is all an illusion.
I cannot be here.
This apartment cannot be real.
This cannot be Dylan.
Dylan is a rich, spoilt, womanizer that I knew ten years ago back in Florissant. I am hallucinating, right?
Suddenly I see the room falling away.
Dylan disappears.
“Ella? Ella baby? Please say something!”
Oh no…
I open my eyes to see Dylan crouching over me, fear strewn across his face.
Did I just blackout?
“What happened?” I ask, trying to sit up.
“Take it easy. You passed out. I barely managed to stop your head from hitting the floor,” Dylan says, sighing with relief. “How do you feel?”
“Foggy. But I think I’m all right. How long was I out?”
“Just a few minutes. Here, sit back on the couch I’ll go get some water.”
Whilst Dylan is gone I try to remember the last thing he said, something about not wanting to lose me?
“What were you saying?” I ask when he returns.
He hands me the water and I guzzle it down. It feels like I have not had a drink in days.
“I asked if you’d give me a second chance,” Dylan says tenderly. “I want us to be together, Ella. I want to take care of you and I want you to come live with me.”
I feel my lip quivering, on the verge of breaking down in happiness.
“Yes,” I barely manage to whisper.
“What, I didn’t quite here you?”
“I said yes. I’ve loved you since I was 18. Of course the answer is yes!”
The smile that etches itself across Dylan’s face is the largest one I have seen yet.
“I promise to always try to make you happy. I’m not perfect but I’ll never hurt you like that again.”
“You better not,” I
“Okay. Go on.”
“The other reason is because of dad. When he was diagnosed with Stage Three colon cancer a year ago, there was only a 53% chance the chemotherapy would kill it. That half-assed percentage really put a lot of things in perspective.”
Dylan wavers, glancing down briefly before locking his eyes back on mine.
“Colon cancer? That’s cancer of the large intestine right?”
“Yeah, it’s not nice. Unfortunately when the doctors found it, it was already in the C stage, which it means it had grown beyond the muscular layer of the bowel wall to the lymph nodes. It’s complicated to explain but so far he’s been responding to the treatment well.”
“Gosh. Poor Tony. He must be terrified.”
“A little, but you know my father, he’s always been headstrong. But getting back to what I was saying before, Ella. The truth is, I don’t know if I would have had the guts to walk into your bookstore a couple of weeks ago if dad hadn’t gotten sick.”
I stare at him, a little puzzled by what he means. “I’m sorry. I’m not sure I understand what you mean.”
“What I’m trying to say is that before that moment, before that day when I thought I might lose my Dad, I didn’t know what was important. I had a vague idea of what I wanted. But I had no plans to actually act on it. But then when that moment came it all suddenly made sense. Do you know what I decided to do in the end?”
“To get a stellar job at Preston & Smith and a swanky new apartment?” I joke.
Dylan laughs but I can tell he wants me to be serious.
“No, something even more important than that.”
I want to say that he decided he wanted me, but I want to hear him say it first.
I want to hear the meaning in his voice.
I want to hear the words that I have romanticized about him saying for ten years.
“Please tell me,” I answer softly.
Dylan looks at me closely, entwining his hands in mine.
“I decided that above everything. Above my career, above owning this apartment, above any amount of money I could ever earn, the one thing that I could not live without, at least not without trying to get…is you. I vowed that if you ever gave me another chance I wouldn’t waste it again, Ella. And I mean that.”
I feel like this is all an illusion.
I cannot be here.
This apartment cannot be real.
This cannot be Dylan.
Dylan is a rich, spoilt, womanizer that I knew ten years ago back in Florissant. I am hallucinating, right?
Suddenly I see the room falling away.
Dylan disappears.
“Ella? Ella baby? Please say something!”
Oh no…
I open my eyes to see Dylan crouching over me, fear strewn across his face.
Did I just blackout?
“What happened?” I ask, trying to sit up.
“Take it easy. You passed out. I barely managed to stop your head from hitting the floor,” Dylan says, sighing with relief. “How do you feel?”
“Foggy. But I think I’m all right. How long was I out?”
“Just a few minutes. Here, sit back on the couch I’ll go get some water.”
Whilst Dylan is gone I try to remember the last thing he said, something about not wanting to lose me?
“What were you saying?” I ask when he returns.
He hands me the water and I guzzle it down. It feels like I have not had a drink in days.
“I asked if you’d give me a second chance,” Dylan says tenderly. “I want us to be together, Ella. I want to take care of you and I want you to come live with me.”
I feel my lip quivering, on the verge of breaking down in happiness.
“Yes,” I barely manage to whisper.
“What, I didn’t quite here you?”
“I said yes. I’ve loved you since I was 18. Of course the answer is yes!”
The smile that etches itself across Dylan’s face is the largest one I have seen yet.
“I promise to always try to make you happy. I’m not perfect but I’ll never hurt you like that again.”
“You better not,” I
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