expect she just started feeling guilty about him. Look on the bright side. At least you know she’s interested.”
“She is?”
“For God’s sake, man.” Ryan shook his head in frustration. “She asked you to dance with her. In the art room at school. You should have just kissed her.”
“You told me not to be pushy,” I snapped.
Ryan grinned. “You bottled it, didn’t you? There’s a time and a place, man. Situation like that, you either seize the moment, or you leave stuff unsaid. What you don’t do is invite someone back to your bedroom to listen to your records. It’s either gonna come out dorky or creepy. Anyway, I gotta go back upstairs.”
“Oh, right,” I said, bitterly. “Got some amazingly hot babe up there, have you?”
“As a matter of fact, yes.” Ryan lowered his voice, so I could only just hear him over the TV. “But my mum doesn’t know she’s there. That’s why I gotta get back.”
I noticed for the first time that Ryan’s shirt was untucked and the back of his hair was all rumpled up.
“Who is it?” I said, trying not to sound envious.
“Like I’m gonna tell you .” Ryan winked at me. “She’s totally Premiership, though.”
He edged towards the door.
Half-term started tomorrow, which meant it would be two weeks until I saw Eve again at Art Club. I remembered what Ben had said in the burger bar and realised, with a sickening lurch, that would be the week of her sixteenth birthday.
I wanted to ask Ryan what he thought I should do next, but knowing he had some girl upstairs waiting for him made it just too humiliating. So we walked out to the front door in silence.
“I’ll come round later,” Ryan said. “We can talk about Step Five then. I think it could help.”
“Whatever,” I grunted – knowing, and not caring, that I sounded ungrateful.
As I walked home I saw Tones going in the opposite direction, his arm round a short, plump, red-haired girl whose face was as covered with freckles as his was with spots.
Kirsty.
I didn’t want to cramp his style, so I just gave him a friendly wink as we passed each other. He looked like he might explode with pride.
Oh well. At least the Six Steps had worked for someone. Seeing Tones looking so happy cheered me up a bit. And Ryan was right. Eve had wanted to dance with me. My mind filled with how amazingly horny she’d looked, pulling me towards her in that patch of sunlight.
As soon as I got home I went up to my room, played my dad’s single of ‘The Passenger’ and let myself think about her, over and over again.
9
Listening
Peeling the skin back from my eyes – I felt surprise
That the time on the clock was the time – I usually retired
To the place where I cleared my head of you
But, just for today, I think I’ll lie here and dream of you
‘Uncertain Smile’
The The
It was Friday, about eight o’clock. Chloe had just snuck in and she and Mum were having yet another row – they were averaging about three a day at the moment. I could hear them from my room, even over the music I was playing.
“How dare you speak to me like that?” Mum yelled.
“Because you’re a total bitch,” Chloe yelled back. “Nobody gets grounded for a month. Nobody. It’s totally unfair.”
I turned the volume up on Dad’s old record player as high as it would go.
I’d played all his records now. Some of them weren’t bad, though I still didn’t understand why he’d given them to me. I’d decided it wasn’t worth feeling hurt about it. After all, not having anything in common with your dad’s not such a big deal.
The music finished and the needle hissed as it flopped off the turntable. I lifted it back onto its arm. This old technology was rubbish. Imagine having to get up and down every time you wanted to put on a new track? The sound quality was the worst thing, though. It had taken me ages to get used to all the crackle and static that existed as permanent background noise under the music.
Everything
“She is?”
“For God’s sake, man.” Ryan shook his head in frustration. “She asked you to dance with her. In the art room at school. You should have just kissed her.”
“You told me not to be pushy,” I snapped.
Ryan grinned. “You bottled it, didn’t you? There’s a time and a place, man. Situation like that, you either seize the moment, or you leave stuff unsaid. What you don’t do is invite someone back to your bedroom to listen to your records. It’s either gonna come out dorky or creepy. Anyway, I gotta go back upstairs.”
“Oh, right,” I said, bitterly. “Got some amazingly hot babe up there, have you?”
“As a matter of fact, yes.” Ryan lowered his voice, so I could only just hear him over the TV. “But my mum doesn’t know she’s there. That’s why I gotta get back.”
I noticed for the first time that Ryan’s shirt was untucked and the back of his hair was all rumpled up.
“Who is it?” I said, trying not to sound envious.
“Like I’m gonna tell you .” Ryan winked at me. “She’s totally Premiership, though.”
He edged towards the door.
Half-term started tomorrow, which meant it would be two weeks until I saw Eve again at Art Club. I remembered what Ben had said in the burger bar and realised, with a sickening lurch, that would be the week of her sixteenth birthday.
I wanted to ask Ryan what he thought I should do next, but knowing he had some girl upstairs waiting for him made it just too humiliating. So we walked out to the front door in silence.
“I’ll come round later,” Ryan said. “We can talk about Step Five then. I think it could help.”
“Whatever,” I grunted – knowing, and not caring, that I sounded ungrateful.
As I walked home I saw Tones going in the opposite direction, his arm round a short, plump, red-haired girl whose face was as covered with freckles as his was with spots.
Kirsty.
I didn’t want to cramp his style, so I just gave him a friendly wink as we passed each other. He looked like he might explode with pride.
Oh well. At least the Six Steps had worked for someone. Seeing Tones looking so happy cheered me up a bit. And Ryan was right. Eve had wanted to dance with me. My mind filled with how amazingly horny she’d looked, pulling me towards her in that patch of sunlight.
As soon as I got home I went up to my room, played my dad’s single of ‘The Passenger’ and let myself think about her, over and over again.
9
Listening
Peeling the skin back from my eyes – I felt surprise
That the time on the clock was the time – I usually retired
To the place where I cleared my head of you
But, just for today, I think I’ll lie here and dream of you
‘Uncertain Smile’
The The
It was Friday, about eight o’clock. Chloe had just snuck in and she and Mum were having yet another row – they were averaging about three a day at the moment. I could hear them from my room, even over the music I was playing.
“How dare you speak to me like that?” Mum yelled.
“Because you’re a total bitch,” Chloe yelled back. “Nobody gets grounded for a month. Nobody. It’s totally unfair.”
I turned the volume up on Dad’s old record player as high as it would go.
I’d played all his records now. Some of them weren’t bad, though I still didn’t understand why he’d given them to me. I’d decided it wasn’t worth feeling hurt about it. After all, not having anything in common with your dad’s not such a big deal.
The music finished and the needle hissed as it flopped off the turntable. I lifted it back onto its arm. This old technology was rubbish. Imagine having to get up and down every time you wanted to put on a new track? The sound quality was the worst thing, though. It had taken me ages to get used to all the crackle and static that existed as permanent background noise under the music.
Everything
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