Sliver Moon Bay: The Looking by Ivana Hruba Page A

inside Starling’s room, burning like a pile of
twigs. The dude’s a goner, for sure. I’m gonna have to tell
Starling about him one day. How everyone looked for her during the
fire and how her wayward grandad gave his life for her. I will tell
her. After we find her.
     
     

 
    20
     
     
    But we didn’t find her. I slept
for a long time. When I woke up, Silly Bitch was gone and in her
place sat Lilian, looking like death warmed up. She looked at me
and began to cry. Silently. She had these huge tears sliding down
her cheeks and she couldn’t stop. She couldn’t speak. She just
looked at me. I knew. We haven’t found Starling.
    Then something weird happened.
I felt myself levitate from the bed. I floated up to the ceiling
where I hovered, looking down at me, lying on the bed, with my eyes
closed, watching Lilian sat in a wheelchair, crying these crocodile
tears that slid down her cheeks like glass snakes. Eventually, they
fell off her cheekbones and shattered on the ground.
    I began to scream. It was so
weird seeing the two of me and Lilian right there not reacting at
all. I screamed and screamed, but she didn’t appear to hear me.
Then the door opened and somebody stuck their head in. I fell into
myself and opened my eyes. The door closed.
    Lilian saw me looking and
smiled.
    ‘You feeling better,
honey?’
    I nodded.
    ‘What’s going on, Mum?’
    Lilian shifts uncomfortably.
She has something to tell me. I can just see it in her eyes. I wish
she’d just come out with it.
    ‘They’ve found Starling’s
Sleepy on the beach.’
    ‘That’s a good thing,
right?’
    ‘We’re hoping it is, honey.
Chris is out there, looking.’
    Lilian starts to cry a little
more. She’s losing control and sobbing now.
    ‘Mum. She wouldn’t have gone in
the water. She doesn’t like the waves.’
    ‘I know,’ sobs Lilian. ‘But
she’s so little and it was dark. Why can’t they find her?’
    I have nothing to tell her.
There’s just no good answer to this.
    ‘How is Drake?’
    She shakes her head. She’s
wiping her tears. She’s making an effort to get a hold of
herself.
    ‘He’s still in intensive care,
honey. No change.’
    The door opened and Chris came
in. He hugged me. Told me how sorry he was for not finding Starling
already. But he will, he promises, if it’s the last thing he’ll
ever do. Who knows? It might as well be. So we all cry. The hope we
all feel can be hugged so we hug it. Like a family. Then Chris
wheels Lilian away.
    I’m left alone to think. I
think of Starling. How little she is, how little she knows about
the world. Where does she fit in it now? And where do I fit without
her? I’m gonna have to find a new place for me but I don’t know
how. Lilian won’t be able to. Chris neither. And nobody else really
matters in our life, do they?
    Fairy comes to me late at
night. She’s looking at me like I should not give up hope. So I
won’t. It will make a difference, I know cause I’ve been hoping to
meet Fairy ever since I remembered her. And one day I’m going to.
So I’m gonna really try and be hopeful.
     
     

 
    21
     
     
    Chris and Lilian return. The
door opens for the second time and it’s the cops come to see me.
Captain Josh walks in followed by a stranger, a serious looking
older man. The two shake hands with Chris and Lilian, look at me
and get down to business.
    The serious type introduces
himself as Detective Martin. Turns out he’s a senior investigator
somewhere impressive, somewhere where they know what they’re doing
and he’s come to take charge of the investigation. He has a lot of
experience with locating missing children. He’s an expert in the
field, according to Captain Josh who seems anxious in the presence
of such authority. His words hit me like a sledge hammer. We have
an expert on board now so officially we have a missing child.
Starling isn’t just missing now, hiding from the fire, waiting it
out somewhere safe where she chose to stay. Starling is a