betraying my thoughts, I would, but it’s better to stay put. I’m sure I’ve only caught his interest because he can’t have me. I turn the treadmill back up to running pace. His eyes track me like a hawk as I get back into rhythm.
“See ya ’round, sweetheart,” he says, flaunting a dimple big enough to drown in. I nod. He struts his way over to the weights, and I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding in.
“Can you believe that guy?” Cassie scowls.
What I can’t believe is that no sooner than I start something with someone do I find myself taunted by eye-candy like Alex. Is this karma for something I did?
“Yeah,” I reply, figuring its best not to tell Cassie what I’m really thinking. Like the way his lips once felt on mine, and how I’d love those hands to grab my arse . It would end up with a lecture that I don’t need to hear.
That night after dinner, Mum comes over unannounced. She’d had the talk with Dad, and they are definitely separating. Dad is going to move out until they figure out how things are going to work.
Mum assures me that it is for the best. I wish I could believe her. Mum says it will be tough on everyone initially, but they are going to try and do it as amicably as possible. Yeah right . I’ve heard that before. That’s what Jon’s parents said, and it turned out to be the bitch-fight of the century.
I’m thankful that Crystal is out to dinner. After Mum leaves, I end up drinking a bottle of cheap white wine, which makes a reappearance in the early hours of the morning. Crying myself to sleep, seems to be the new norm.
****
The last few weeks have been much of the same: work, gym, sleep, and every now and then, when my head’s too fucked up to deal, tears into my pillow. My family is crumbling. Sometimes, the only thing that gets me out of bed is Jon. We aren’t spending any more time together than usual, but he is there whenever I need him. And he gives great cuddles, something I’m growing rather fond of.
We are still close like we were before, but each time we see each other there’s the inevitable moment where things get that little bit friendlier. We haven’t gotten naked or anything yet, but it’s bound to happen sooner or later. I know Jon is taking it extra slow … he probably doesn’t want to scare me off. Besides, we are still getting used to this.
Not that I’ve ever told him in so many words, but Jon must know I haven’t slept with anyone before. Sex is the elephant in the room, and its hairy arse is growing bigger by the day. We are slowly running out of room. Surely, he notices it too.
Cassie asked me the other day how things were going between us. Relief washed over her face when I said we were taking it slow. But to me, it seems a little too slow. I’m definitely no expert, but it should be moving faster, shouldn’t it? I want to try and make this work. It’s my first real relationship. So, I got up the courage and asked her for advice. I know I’ve read a heap of romance books, but imagining it and doing it are completely different things. I’ve never touched a guy there before. What if I do it wrong? Sure, I once rubbed up against a guy at a party while we kissed, but that’s it. I was also embarrassed to admit to Cassie that I’d never been naked in front of anyone before, but she assures me I have nothing to worry about. I hope she’s right.
Cassie recommended I grab a Cosmo magazine, for a bit more factual material.
So I did. And now I’m more nervous than ever. I think I need a drink.
****
Today is Saturday. Date night . Jon and I are going out somewhere for dinner.
Since we started seeing each other, we are always at his place. Last week, he said he wanted to take me out for dinner. “Are you taking me out on a date?” I’d teased. So yes, this is our first official date night.
I drive over to Jon’s at around seven o’clock—butterflies and all. It’s still very cold at night, but I can’t wear
“See ya ’round, sweetheart,” he says, flaunting a dimple big enough to drown in. I nod. He struts his way over to the weights, and I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding in.
“Can you believe that guy?” Cassie scowls.
What I can’t believe is that no sooner than I start something with someone do I find myself taunted by eye-candy like Alex. Is this karma for something I did?
“Yeah,” I reply, figuring its best not to tell Cassie what I’m really thinking. Like the way his lips once felt on mine, and how I’d love those hands to grab my arse . It would end up with a lecture that I don’t need to hear.
That night after dinner, Mum comes over unannounced. She’d had the talk with Dad, and they are definitely separating. Dad is going to move out until they figure out how things are going to work.
Mum assures me that it is for the best. I wish I could believe her. Mum says it will be tough on everyone initially, but they are going to try and do it as amicably as possible. Yeah right . I’ve heard that before. That’s what Jon’s parents said, and it turned out to be the bitch-fight of the century.
I’m thankful that Crystal is out to dinner. After Mum leaves, I end up drinking a bottle of cheap white wine, which makes a reappearance in the early hours of the morning. Crying myself to sleep, seems to be the new norm.
****
The last few weeks have been much of the same: work, gym, sleep, and every now and then, when my head’s too fucked up to deal, tears into my pillow. My family is crumbling. Sometimes, the only thing that gets me out of bed is Jon. We aren’t spending any more time together than usual, but he is there whenever I need him. And he gives great cuddles, something I’m growing rather fond of.
We are still close like we were before, but each time we see each other there’s the inevitable moment where things get that little bit friendlier. We haven’t gotten naked or anything yet, but it’s bound to happen sooner or later. I know Jon is taking it extra slow … he probably doesn’t want to scare me off. Besides, we are still getting used to this.
Not that I’ve ever told him in so many words, but Jon must know I haven’t slept with anyone before. Sex is the elephant in the room, and its hairy arse is growing bigger by the day. We are slowly running out of room. Surely, he notices it too.
Cassie asked me the other day how things were going between us. Relief washed over her face when I said we were taking it slow. But to me, it seems a little too slow. I’m definitely no expert, but it should be moving faster, shouldn’t it? I want to try and make this work. It’s my first real relationship. So, I got up the courage and asked her for advice. I know I’ve read a heap of romance books, but imagining it and doing it are completely different things. I’ve never touched a guy there before. What if I do it wrong? Sure, I once rubbed up against a guy at a party while we kissed, but that’s it. I was also embarrassed to admit to Cassie that I’d never been naked in front of anyone before, but she assures me I have nothing to worry about. I hope she’s right.
Cassie recommended I grab a Cosmo magazine, for a bit more factual material.
So I did. And now I’m more nervous than ever. I think I need a drink.
****
Today is Saturday. Date night . Jon and I are going out somewhere for dinner.
Since we started seeing each other, we are always at his place. Last week, he said he wanted to take me out for dinner. “Are you taking me out on a date?” I’d teased. So yes, this is our first official date night.
I drive over to Jon’s at around seven o’clock—butterflies and all. It’s still very cold at night, but I can’t wear
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