fresh in her mind and her own instincts were so strong.
‘Forgive me, but I can’t. You know I can’t.’
‘You think I wouldn’t respect you, wouldn’t love you afterwards? Is that it?’
‘I wouldn’t respect myself. So how could you?’
‘Darling, it’s not wrong when two people love each other. I swear I’d love you more, not less, knowing you were mine and mine alone. Please, Eveleen.’
He was pulling her closer to him again, holding her tightly, but now she put her palms flat against his chest and pushed him back.
He flung himself away from her angrily. ‘You say you love me, but you don’t show it.’ He grabbed hold of her again and pulled her roughly to him. ‘Prove it, Eveleen.
Prove how much you love me.’
Eveleen didn’t know what to say or do to convince him of her love, short of doing what he asked of her. They were so close that she could feel his breath on her face. His mouth twisted
into a sneer. ‘I suppose your dear mama has drilled it into you from the time you could walk that you must never let a man have his wicked way with you until you’ve his ring on your
finger. And a wedding band at that.’
‘This has nothing to do with my mother,’ she said hotly. ‘This is to do with me. How I feel. I’m – I’m not saying we have to be married first. I’m just
saying now is too early. Too soon.’ He said nothing so she went on and her tone hardened as she said, ‘A few secret meetings in an old barn or in the woods and you expect me to lift my
skirts for you.’ She was speaking with deliberate crudity, because that was what he was trying to turn their love into: some sordid, clandestine coupling no better than the beast in the
field.
He released her. ‘You mean,’ he said mockingly, ‘that if I was to take you out, wine you and dine you, shower you with gifts and take you home to meet my people, then you
would?’
‘No,’ Eveleen said carefully. ‘I don’t mean that at all. We know each other’s “people”, as you put it. But this is hardly a proper courtship, is it? Not
hiding away as if we’re ashamed of our love.’ She put her hand on his arm as she went on eagerly. ‘Stephen, I want you to speak to my father about us. We can meet openly then.
Please, say you will?’
His gaze dropped away from meeting her eyes. He sat down and leant back against a tree, his hands linked behind his head.
‘I could,’ he said, evenly. ‘But I’m going to be busy for a while. I may not be able to see you so much.’
Eveleen felt as if the breath were being squeezed out of her body. She sat beside him. ‘Why?’
Stephen sat forward in a quick, eager movement. His face, animated with excitement, was close to hers. ‘My father is going to stand for Parliament and he wants me to take on more
responsibility for the estate. He’s going to be very busy campaigning.’
‘But why does that mean we can’t meet?’
‘I told you. I’ll be busy.’
‘But you’ve got Mr Jackson. The estate bailiff. Won’t he—’
Stephen dismissed him with a wave of his hand. ‘Jackson’s all right. But he’s still only an employee. It’s not the same.’
‘Are you . . . ?’ Unshed tears caught at her throat. ‘Are you telling me it’s finished?’
He put his arms about her and pulled her to him. ‘Darling, of course not.’ He kissed her but beneath his mouth her lips were cold and unresponsive.
‘Darling Eveleen.’ He kissed her neck and his hands stroked her hair. ‘Of course, it’s not over. It’s only just beginning.’
Won over by his caresses and his whispered endearments, Eveleen wound her arms around his neck.
‘Oh, Stephen,’ she whispered. ‘It’s just that I do love you so much.’
Eveleen ran down the hill through the gathering dusk, her heart singing. Stephen loved her, she knew he did. He hadn’t actually said it, but she was sure that was because
he was shy. She had found it difficult to say “I love you” the first time, but now
‘Forgive me, but I can’t. You know I can’t.’
‘You think I wouldn’t respect you, wouldn’t love you afterwards? Is that it?’
‘I wouldn’t respect myself. So how could you?’
‘Darling, it’s not wrong when two people love each other. I swear I’d love you more, not less, knowing you were mine and mine alone. Please, Eveleen.’
He was pulling her closer to him again, holding her tightly, but now she put her palms flat against his chest and pushed him back.
He flung himself away from her angrily. ‘You say you love me, but you don’t show it.’ He grabbed hold of her again and pulled her roughly to him. ‘Prove it, Eveleen.
Prove how much you love me.’
Eveleen didn’t know what to say or do to convince him of her love, short of doing what he asked of her. They were so close that she could feel his breath on her face. His mouth twisted
into a sneer. ‘I suppose your dear mama has drilled it into you from the time you could walk that you must never let a man have his wicked way with you until you’ve his ring on your
finger. And a wedding band at that.’
‘This has nothing to do with my mother,’ she said hotly. ‘This is to do with me. How I feel. I’m – I’m not saying we have to be married first. I’m just
saying now is too early. Too soon.’ He said nothing so she went on and her tone hardened as she said, ‘A few secret meetings in an old barn or in the woods and you expect me to lift my
skirts for you.’ She was speaking with deliberate crudity, because that was what he was trying to turn their love into: some sordid, clandestine coupling no better than the beast in the
field.
He released her. ‘You mean,’ he said mockingly, ‘that if I was to take you out, wine you and dine you, shower you with gifts and take you home to meet my people, then you
would?’
‘No,’ Eveleen said carefully. ‘I don’t mean that at all. We know each other’s “people”, as you put it. But this is hardly a proper courtship, is it? Not
hiding away as if we’re ashamed of our love.’ She put her hand on his arm as she went on eagerly. ‘Stephen, I want you to speak to my father about us. We can meet openly then.
Please, say you will?’
His gaze dropped away from meeting her eyes. He sat down and leant back against a tree, his hands linked behind his head.
‘I could,’ he said, evenly. ‘But I’m going to be busy for a while. I may not be able to see you so much.’
Eveleen felt as if the breath were being squeezed out of her body. She sat beside him. ‘Why?’
Stephen sat forward in a quick, eager movement. His face, animated with excitement, was close to hers. ‘My father is going to stand for Parliament and he wants me to take on more
responsibility for the estate. He’s going to be very busy campaigning.’
‘But why does that mean we can’t meet?’
‘I told you. I’ll be busy.’
‘But you’ve got Mr Jackson. The estate bailiff. Won’t he—’
Stephen dismissed him with a wave of his hand. ‘Jackson’s all right. But he’s still only an employee. It’s not the same.’
‘Are you . . . ?’ Unshed tears caught at her throat. ‘Are you telling me it’s finished?’
He put his arms about her and pulled her to him. ‘Darling, of course not.’ He kissed her but beneath his mouth her lips were cold and unresponsive.
‘Darling Eveleen.’ He kissed her neck and his hands stroked her hair. ‘Of course, it’s not over. It’s only just beginning.’
Won over by his caresses and his whispered endearments, Eveleen wound her arms around his neck.
‘Oh, Stephen,’ she whispered. ‘It’s just that I do love you so much.’
Eveleen ran down the hill through the gathering dusk, her heart singing. Stephen loved her, she knew he did. He hadn’t actually said it, but she was sure that was because
he was shy. She had found it difficult to say “I love you” the first time, but now
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