any worse than it already was.
Yet, he still couldn't do what she wanted. To go to the cemetery and pray to an empty coffin was beyond him. His wife's remains weren't there. The Thames had taken the body and it was never found. He hadn't even attended the funeral, because he was still in a coma. They buried an empty coffin in a symbolic gesture, so that the family could bid her farewell, they'd said. At each anniversary of her death the family went to the cemetery. Aidan had never gone and he wasn't going to do it this time either. He just couldn't pretend that his dead wife's spirit was at the cemetery.
"The children miss you," Jane insisted. "They love to see you. You're still their hero. They even tell their friends that you're the highest ranked policeman in the city."
"I'll try to go, seriously. If I can't, I'll call in later."
"That's what I'm hoping," she sighed sadly.
She said goodbye with a long kiss on the cheek before she walked down the corridor. Aidan watched her go until she disappeared through the lift doors.
"Shit!" Lance said. "I forgot that tomorrow is the anniversary of her death."
"It doesn't matter, Lance," he said, walking towards the exit. "It's not your problem. It's mine."
"You're an imbecile," Lance let him know. "It peeves me that you're capable of saying that. Do you think I don't miss her too?"
"I didn't mean to say that," Aidan said, softening his voice. "I'm sorry, mate. You know that wasn't my intention."
"Stop carrying it inside and go tomorrow. Jane's right. They want to share it with you."
As they left the hospital Aidan looked at his partner seriously. He wasn't angry with him but he realized that Lance simply didn't understand that his situation had nothing to do with logic. Aidan couldn't get his emotions under control sufficiently to be able to do what seemed right. He concentrated on Lance's good sentiment and not on getting angry for a reason the other man wouldn't understand.
"She's not buried there. I can't go."
"Do you think I don’t know that?" Lance stopped him in the middle of the street. "I was the one who went looking for her body. Have you forgotten that? You were in a coma. The doctors said it was more than likely that you wouldn't wake up. I directed the search in the Thames for weeks, until they wouldn't let me go on with it."
"At least you did something. I woke up to discover that she was dead and buried. I couldn't do anything."
"Well, there's something you can do now," Lance said in a different tone. "There are people who want to share your pain. The few neurons that you've got should know that I'm right." Aidan stood still, without expression. Lance moved his head from one side to the other looking at him. "I know that bothers you. But that's how it is. You're big and tall and you're lucky you recovered. But your virtues end there, my friend. I know you recognize in me an intellect of a higher order, and that drives you crazy."
"You're spot on." Aidan paused. "But shut up or I swear I'll pull your tongue out."
"You can't survive without my advice. Besides, if I shut up I won't be able to give you the good news."
"What are you talking about? More advice?"
"No," he said smiling. "I just wanted to tell you that at this very minute your girlfriend is walking towards you."
CHAPTER 5
"You take care of it this time," Mike said, his shoulders slumped at the bottom of the stairs. "I promise you if I get out of going up, I'll give you half of my wages."
"Stop dreaming," Steve replied quickly. "It's our work, my friend. This bastard of a job is for the two of us. Don't think I'm going to take it on alone."
Steve wasn't capable of holding his bad temper in. He threw the backpack carrying the equipment onto the ground and kicked it. Mike watched him in silence, he was exhausted and the situation wasn't something to be exactly happy about.
"You know I'd do it for you," Mike insisted. "It's just a question of age, nothing more. I would go back myself,
Yet, he still couldn't do what she wanted. To go to the cemetery and pray to an empty coffin was beyond him. His wife's remains weren't there. The Thames had taken the body and it was never found. He hadn't even attended the funeral, because he was still in a coma. They buried an empty coffin in a symbolic gesture, so that the family could bid her farewell, they'd said. At each anniversary of her death the family went to the cemetery. Aidan had never gone and he wasn't going to do it this time either. He just couldn't pretend that his dead wife's spirit was at the cemetery.
"The children miss you," Jane insisted. "They love to see you. You're still their hero. They even tell their friends that you're the highest ranked policeman in the city."
"I'll try to go, seriously. If I can't, I'll call in later."
"That's what I'm hoping," she sighed sadly.
She said goodbye with a long kiss on the cheek before she walked down the corridor. Aidan watched her go until she disappeared through the lift doors.
"Shit!" Lance said. "I forgot that tomorrow is the anniversary of her death."
"It doesn't matter, Lance," he said, walking towards the exit. "It's not your problem. It's mine."
"You're an imbecile," Lance let him know. "It peeves me that you're capable of saying that. Do you think I don't miss her too?"
"I didn't mean to say that," Aidan said, softening his voice. "I'm sorry, mate. You know that wasn't my intention."
"Stop carrying it inside and go tomorrow. Jane's right. They want to share it with you."
As they left the hospital Aidan looked at his partner seriously. He wasn't angry with him but he realized that Lance simply didn't understand that his situation had nothing to do with logic. Aidan couldn't get his emotions under control sufficiently to be able to do what seemed right. He concentrated on Lance's good sentiment and not on getting angry for a reason the other man wouldn't understand.
"She's not buried there. I can't go."
"Do you think I don’t know that?" Lance stopped him in the middle of the street. "I was the one who went looking for her body. Have you forgotten that? You were in a coma. The doctors said it was more than likely that you wouldn't wake up. I directed the search in the Thames for weeks, until they wouldn't let me go on with it."
"At least you did something. I woke up to discover that she was dead and buried. I couldn't do anything."
"Well, there's something you can do now," Lance said in a different tone. "There are people who want to share your pain. The few neurons that you've got should know that I'm right." Aidan stood still, without expression. Lance moved his head from one side to the other looking at him. "I know that bothers you. But that's how it is. You're big and tall and you're lucky you recovered. But your virtues end there, my friend. I know you recognize in me an intellect of a higher order, and that drives you crazy."
"You're spot on." Aidan paused. "But shut up or I swear I'll pull your tongue out."
"You can't survive without my advice. Besides, if I shut up I won't be able to give you the good news."
"What are you talking about? More advice?"
"No," he said smiling. "I just wanted to tell you that at this very minute your girlfriend is walking towards you."
CHAPTER 5
"You take care of it this time," Mike said, his shoulders slumped at the bottom of the stairs. "I promise you if I get out of going up, I'll give you half of my wages."
"Stop dreaming," Steve replied quickly. "It's our work, my friend. This bastard of a job is for the two of us. Don't think I'm going to take it on alone."
Steve wasn't capable of holding his bad temper in. He threw the backpack carrying the equipment onto the ground and kicked it. Mike watched him in silence, he was exhausted and the situation wasn't something to be exactly happy about.
"You know I'd do it for you," Mike insisted. "It's just a question of age, nothing more. I would go back myself,
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