said it very nicely of course, not an accusation, nothing you could take offence at …’
‘I most certainly do take offence at it,’ Maddy blazed. ‘How dare he insinuate that there has been anything improper between us. How
dare
he!’
‘No, he didn’t. He was very anxious that I should know he wasn’t suggesting that.’ He walked up and down as he talked, agitated, and anxious to get over the mildness of the message, the lack of blame and the motive behind it. It was just that Father Gunn wanted to protect them both from evil minds and idle wagging tongues. In a place this size when people had little real news to speculate about they made up their own. It would be better for Father Barry not to be seen so obviously sharing the same interests as Miss Ross, for both of them to make other friends.
‘And what did you say, Brian?’ Her pale eyes had flecks of light in them tonight.
‘I said that he had a very poor opinion of people if he thought they would give such low motives to what was an obvious and proper friendship.’
But it was clear that Brian Barry had not found his own answer satisfactory. He looked confused and bewildered. She had never loved him more. ‘I am sorry, Maddy, I couldn’t think of what else to say.’ He had never called her Maddy before, always Madeleine like her mother did.
She moved over to him and closed her arms around his neck. He smelled still of cigarette smoke, but his soap was Imperial Leather now, and he hadn’t been eating the winegums. It was the chocolate cake given to him, Maddy realised, by her mother.
‘It was perfect,’ she whispered.
He looked very startled and moved as if to get away.
‘What was perfect?’ he asked, his eyes large and alarmed.
‘What you said. It is a proper friendship and a proper love …’
‘Yes … well …’ He hadn’t raised his arms to hold her.
She moved nearer to him and pressed herself towards him. ‘Brian, hold me. Please hold me.’
‘I can’t, Maddy. I can’t. I’m a priest.’
‘I held you years ago when you had no friend. Hold me now; now that I have no friend and they are trying to take you away.’ Her eyes filled with tears.
‘No, no, no.’ He soothed her as she had stroked him all that time ago. He held her head to his shoulder and comforted her. ‘No, it’s not a question of being taken away … it’s just … well, you know what it is.’
She snuggled closer to him. Again she could hear his heart beat in the way she had remembered so often from that first time. He was about to release her so she allowed sobs to shake her body again. He was so clumsy, and tender at the same time. Maddy knew that this was her man, and her one chance to take what life was presenting.
‘I love you so much, Brian,’ she whispered.
The answering words were not there. She changed direction slightly.
‘You are the only person who understands me, who knows what I want to do in the world, and I think I’m the only person who knows what is best for you.’ She gulped as she spoke so that he wouldn’t think the storm was over, the need for consolation at an end. In the seven years since they had first held each other in these woods times had changed; when he offered her a handkerchief now it was a paper tissue, when he sat down beside her on their log to smoke it wasn’t the flaky old Gold Flake, it was a tipped cigarette.
‘You’ve been better to me than anyone in the world. I mean that.’ His voice was sincere. He
did
mean it. Shecould see his brain clicking through all the people who had been good to him, his mother, some kind superior in the seminary possibly. She was the best of this pathetic little list. That was all. Why was she not his great love? She would have to walk very warily.
‘I have wanted the best for you since the day I met you,’ she said simply.
‘And I for you. Truly.’
This was probably true, Maddy thought. Like he wanted the best for the people of Vieja Piedra, wanted it in his
‘I most certainly do take offence at it,’ Maddy blazed. ‘How dare he insinuate that there has been anything improper between us. How
dare
he!’
‘No, he didn’t. He was very anxious that I should know he wasn’t suggesting that.’ He walked up and down as he talked, agitated, and anxious to get over the mildness of the message, the lack of blame and the motive behind it. It was just that Father Gunn wanted to protect them both from evil minds and idle wagging tongues. In a place this size when people had little real news to speculate about they made up their own. It would be better for Father Barry not to be seen so obviously sharing the same interests as Miss Ross, for both of them to make other friends.
‘And what did you say, Brian?’ Her pale eyes had flecks of light in them tonight.
‘I said that he had a very poor opinion of people if he thought they would give such low motives to what was an obvious and proper friendship.’
But it was clear that Brian Barry had not found his own answer satisfactory. He looked confused and bewildered. She had never loved him more. ‘I am sorry, Maddy, I couldn’t think of what else to say.’ He had never called her Maddy before, always Madeleine like her mother did.
She moved over to him and closed her arms around his neck. He smelled still of cigarette smoke, but his soap was Imperial Leather now, and he hadn’t been eating the winegums. It was the chocolate cake given to him, Maddy realised, by her mother.
‘It was perfect,’ she whispered.
He looked very startled and moved as if to get away.
‘What was perfect?’ he asked, his eyes large and alarmed.
‘What you said. It is a proper friendship and a proper love …’
‘Yes … well …’ He hadn’t raised his arms to hold her.
She moved nearer to him and pressed herself towards him. ‘Brian, hold me. Please hold me.’
‘I can’t, Maddy. I can’t. I’m a priest.’
‘I held you years ago when you had no friend. Hold me now; now that I have no friend and they are trying to take you away.’ Her eyes filled with tears.
‘No, no, no.’ He soothed her as she had stroked him all that time ago. He held her head to his shoulder and comforted her. ‘No, it’s not a question of being taken away … it’s just … well, you know what it is.’
She snuggled closer to him. Again she could hear his heart beat in the way she had remembered so often from that first time. He was about to release her so she allowed sobs to shake her body again. He was so clumsy, and tender at the same time. Maddy knew that this was her man, and her one chance to take what life was presenting.
‘I love you so much, Brian,’ she whispered.
The answering words were not there. She changed direction slightly.
‘You are the only person who understands me, who knows what I want to do in the world, and I think I’m the only person who knows what is best for you.’ She gulped as she spoke so that he wouldn’t think the storm was over, the need for consolation at an end. In the seven years since they had first held each other in these woods times had changed; when he offered her a handkerchief now it was a paper tissue, when he sat down beside her on their log to smoke it wasn’t the flaky old Gold Flake, it was a tipped cigarette.
‘You’ve been better to me than anyone in the world. I mean that.’ His voice was sincere. He
did
mean it. Shecould see his brain clicking through all the people who had been good to him, his mother, some kind superior in the seminary possibly. She was the best of this pathetic little list. That was all. Why was she not his great love? She would have to walk very warily.
‘I have wanted the best for you since the day I met you,’ she said simply.
‘And I for you. Truly.’
This was probably true, Maddy thought. Like he wanted the best for the people of Vieja Piedra, wanted it in his
Similar Books
