understand? That she could help us? That we can trust her? That she knows how to keep a secret? That she’d be able to understand us? That if she understood us she’d find a solution? That there is a solution? That it will be over soon? That Giulia will call while she’s on vacation? That you’re worth something to her? That it’s better if we sort things out on our own, like always? That we’ll know how to sort things out? That we don’t need anyone else? That I can do it? Do you think so?
Otherwise I could call the vet, who is a kind of doctor at least, but I don’t know if that’s a good idea.
I’m really not sure what to do. I’ll end up doing nothing.
I could talk to a friend, but I don’t know if I have such a friendly friend. Anyway, friends are crawling with parents. If they let anything slip out, I’m finished.
“It’s all right, Mama, don’t worry. Everything went fine at school as usual.”
I head down the hall.
“Do you think it’s my fault you died?”
I have to call Davide, to tell him about the movies.
“My mother said it’s fine, she’ll drop me off. What time?”
“At four.”
“Okay, see you at your place.”
Luckily I know where Davide lives. I’ll have to take the tram there, but it’s easy.
The people on the tram stink. It’s always that way when it rains. Their coats smell like wet dogs. Or car seats when people have smoked there. Every once in a while adults stink. They’ve got bad breath, or hair that smells like unmade beds. Old people stink of old people. My grandpa stunk of really old people. He was really old. Grandma smells like violets and lilies of the valley, like napkins forgotten in a drawer. Mama was born by accident when Grandma thought she couldn’t have any more kids because she was already on pause.
“It was a miracle I was born, or a joke, you know? A joke of nature.”
At the third stop I get off.
I arrive at Davide’s house and ring the bell.
“My mother was in a hurry because she had to go to the doctor.”
I go up.
Davide’s house isn’t bad. It’s always a bit crazy. Better than Marco’s house, where right away the maid makes you feel uncomfortable and everything is in its place, with the newspapers and books on the tables fanned out like in doctors’ waiting rooms and you already feel sick, already sure they’ll find something wrong with you: Hmmm, exactly as I suspected; try to cough a little. People who are perfect always make you feel like trash.
Davide’s mother, on the other hand, always seems a bit disorganized. She wears long scarves and never goes to the hairdresser. She’s always waving her arms around as if she’s chasing away flies. She’s agitated now too, so she’s not worried about Mama not being able to come up. We have a Coke and then go to the movies to see
Ice Age
.
The movie isn’t bad, it’s just that all I can think about is what I’ll do afterward; I have to make sure I get a lift without making them suspicious. During the intermission, Davide tells me that tomorrow he’s going to come to my place to do homework. This sends me into total panic, so after that I don’t catch much of what happens to the prehistoric animals, and I couldn’t care less if the dodo becomes extinct. For me a new age has come: We’ve entered the Late Liar era.
They always say that you shouldn’t tell lies, but without lies I’d already be in an orphanage.
This, in any case, is my first true lie.
It’s no use crossing my fingers or my toes or touching my nose for luck. I don’t have any choice. It’s just that in the movies at least you always have someone to face the tough times with. There’s a main character in difficulty, and at a certain point someone appears to get him out of trouble. Maybe I shouldn’t have come to the movies, but it was for the sake of the details: Someone who goes to the movies surely can’t have a mother dead in her bed.
Luckily, when we leave, Davide’s sister is wailing that
Otherwise I could call the vet, who is a kind of doctor at least, but I don’t know if that’s a good idea.
I’m really not sure what to do. I’ll end up doing nothing.
I could talk to a friend, but I don’t know if I have such a friendly friend. Anyway, friends are crawling with parents. If they let anything slip out, I’m finished.
“It’s all right, Mama, don’t worry. Everything went fine at school as usual.”
I head down the hall.
“Do you think it’s my fault you died?”
I have to call Davide, to tell him about the movies.
“My mother said it’s fine, she’ll drop me off. What time?”
“At four.”
“Okay, see you at your place.”
Luckily I know where Davide lives. I’ll have to take the tram there, but it’s easy.
The people on the tram stink. It’s always that way when it rains. Their coats smell like wet dogs. Or car seats when people have smoked there. Every once in a while adults stink. They’ve got bad breath, or hair that smells like unmade beds. Old people stink of old people. My grandpa stunk of really old people. He was really old. Grandma smells like violets and lilies of the valley, like napkins forgotten in a drawer. Mama was born by accident when Grandma thought she couldn’t have any more kids because she was already on pause.
“It was a miracle I was born, or a joke, you know? A joke of nature.”
At the third stop I get off.
I arrive at Davide’s house and ring the bell.
“My mother was in a hurry because she had to go to the doctor.”
I go up.
Davide’s house isn’t bad. It’s always a bit crazy. Better than Marco’s house, where right away the maid makes you feel uncomfortable and everything is in its place, with the newspapers and books on the tables fanned out like in doctors’ waiting rooms and you already feel sick, already sure they’ll find something wrong with you: Hmmm, exactly as I suspected; try to cough a little. People who are perfect always make you feel like trash.
Davide’s mother, on the other hand, always seems a bit disorganized. She wears long scarves and never goes to the hairdresser. She’s always waving her arms around as if she’s chasing away flies. She’s agitated now too, so she’s not worried about Mama not being able to come up. We have a Coke and then go to the movies to see
Ice Age
.
The movie isn’t bad, it’s just that all I can think about is what I’ll do afterward; I have to make sure I get a lift without making them suspicious. During the intermission, Davide tells me that tomorrow he’s going to come to my place to do homework. This sends me into total panic, so after that I don’t catch much of what happens to the prehistoric animals, and I couldn’t care less if the dodo becomes extinct. For me a new age has come: We’ve entered the Late Liar era.
They always say that you shouldn’t tell lies, but without lies I’d already be in an orphanage.
This, in any case, is my first true lie.
It’s no use crossing my fingers or my toes or touching my nose for luck. I don’t have any choice. It’s just that in the movies at least you always have someone to face the tough times with. There’s a main character in difficulty, and at a certain point someone appears to get him out of trouble. Maybe I shouldn’t have come to the movies, but it was for the sake of the details: Someone who goes to the movies surely can’t have a mother dead in her bed.
Luckily, when we leave, Davide’s sister is wailing that
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