the end of his last visit. But today she was
cheerful, greeting him like a favourite grandson. Dave was having a check-up at the local hospital today and in his absence Gill had made a long list of chores for Barney to do. The first item on
it was to move a number of cardboard boxes out of their spare room and empty the contents into the various recycling bins in the garden.
The boxes were so heavy and awkward that at first he thought they must contain old engine parts or bathroom tiles. But when he opened the first box at the bottom of the Abbotts’ garden he
realised it was filled with nothing heavier than bits of old paper. He was stunned at how heavy a box filled with paper could actually be. Awarding himself a five-minute break, Barney idly prised
open the flaps of the cardboard box sitting next to him and drew out the top sheet of paper. It was dog-eared and thinning with age almost to the point of translucency. The words on it had been
neatly and densely typed on an old-fashioned typewriter.
FRIDAY 6th AUGUST 1976 (CONT’D)
eventually found one of the type described by Roderick Branwen in a junk shop in Kings Street, Mold, North Wales. The locket is inscribed with pictures of angels and so
far proving as hard to open as any found by Branwen himself. There appears to be some secret to the locking mechanism, almost certainly some quite simple trick, which I have not yet been able
to fathom. I am convinced that if I work at this problem for a few more hours I shall have discovered its
Barney put the page aside and drew out a handful more. One had wider line spacing, making it easier to read, and appeared to be the title page of a document. It read:
THE SOCIETY OF HIGHLY UNUSUAL THINGS AGENDA FOR MEETING – MAY 1976
1) Minutes of previous meeting
2) St Martin’s Church poltergeist
3) Invisible milkman?
4) Microscopic dragons
5) Time-travelling tourist in Boots the Chemist
6) Yeti sighting in Derbyshire Peaks
7) DJ on Blue Hills FM is reincarnation of Sir Isaac Newton
8) Can herons predict the stock market?
Barney stifled a gasp. He reached into the box and pulled out a thick sheaf of paper. Taking a sheet at random from the middle of the pile he studied it, his mouth slowly
sagging open in surprise.
13th FEBRUARY 1971 (CONT’D)
seems likely the creature menacing the Thompsons’ gift shop is indeed a cockatrice. The tracks are definitely those of a two-legged creature and the presence of
chicken feathers confirm
‘I thought I told you to throw those away.’
Gill’s voice cut through Barney like a sword.
‘I’m – I’m sorry,’ he stammered, heart pounding. ‘I was just taking a break. My arms are tired.’ He clambered off the bed hurriedly.
Gill took the sheet of paper from his hand and squinted at it. She snorted and crumpled it in her wrinkled fist. ‘Should have thrown out this rubbish a long time ago.’ She tossed the
ball of paper into the cardboard box.
‘What’s the Society of Highly Unusual Things?’ asked Barney.
‘Nothing to concern you,’ said Gill. ‘A lot of nonsense from a very long time ago, that’s all. Now come on, there’s plenty more of these boxes to shift.’
‘Did you investigate weird things that happened in Blue Hills? Is that what the society did?’
‘Forget it,’ snapped Gill. All friendliness had drained from her voice. ‘I don’t want to talk about it. Now move. Work to do.’
‘It’s just that me and my friend Gabby do exactly the same thing!’ Barney pressed on excitedly. ‘We have a club called Geek Inc. We love investigating strange happenings.
Are all the things written down here true? Can I show the papers to Gabby? She’d love to see them.’
‘No. Just throw everything out.’ Gill turned her back to him, the walker rattling in her hands. ‘Can’t have this old junk cluttering up the house.’
‘We spoke to Fiona Cress,’ said Barney. ‘She told us about the backwards robot. And about . . .
cheerful, greeting him like a favourite grandson. Dave was having a check-up at the local hospital today and in his absence Gill had made a long list of chores for Barney to do. The first item on
it was to move a number of cardboard boxes out of their spare room and empty the contents into the various recycling bins in the garden.
The boxes were so heavy and awkward that at first he thought they must contain old engine parts or bathroom tiles. But when he opened the first box at the bottom of the Abbotts’ garden he
realised it was filled with nothing heavier than bits of old paper. He was stunned at how heavy a box filled with paper could actually be. Awarding himself a five-minute break, Barney idly prised
open the flaps of the cardboard box sitting next to him and drew out the top sheet of paper. It was dog-eared and thinning with age almost to the point of translucency. The words on it had been
neatly and densely typed on an old-fashioned typewriter.
FRIDAY 6th AUGUST 1976 (CONT’D)
eventually found one of the type described by Roderick Branwen in a junk shop in Kings Street, Mold, North Wales. The locket is inscribed with pictures of angels and so
far proving as hard to open as any found by Branwen himself. There appears to be some secret to the locking mechanism, almost certainly some quite simple trick, which I have not yet been able
to fathom. I am convinced that if I work at this problem for a few more hours I shall have discovered its
Barney put the page aside and drew out a handful more. One had wider line spacing, making it easier to read, and appeared to be the title page of a document. It read:
THE SOCIETY OF HIGHLY UNUSUAL THINGS AGENDA FOR MEETING – MAY 1976
1) Minutes of previous meeting
2) St Martin’s Church poltergeist
3) Invisible milkman?
4) Microscopic dragons
5) Time-travelling tourist in Boots the Chemist
6) Yeti sighting in Derbyshire Peaks
7) DJ on Blue Hills FM is reincarnation of Sir Isaac Newton
8) Can herons predict the stock market?
Barney stifled a gasp. He reached into the box and pulled out a thick sheaf of paper. Taking a sheet at random from the middle of the pile he studied it, his mouth slowly
sagging open in surprise.
13th FEBRUARY 1971 (CONT’D)
seems likely the creature menacing the Thompsons’ gift shop is indeed a cockatrice. The tracks are definitely those of a two-legged creature and the presence of
chicken feathers confirm
‘I thought I told you to throw those away.’
Gill’s voice cut through Barney like a sword.
‘I’m – I’m sorry,’ he stammered, heart pounding. ‘I was just taking a break. My arms are tired.’ He clambered off the bed hurriedly.
Gill took the sheet of paper from his hand and squinted at it. She snorted and crumpled it in her wrinkled fist. ‘Should have thrown out this rubbish a long time ago.’ She tossed the
ball of paper into the cardboard box.
‘What’s the Society of Highly Unusual Things?’ asked Barney.
‘Nothing to concern you,’ said Gill. ‘A lot of nonsense from a very long time ago, that’s all. Now come on, there’s plenty more of these boxes to shift.’
‘Did you investigate weird things that happened in Blue Hills? Is that what the society did?’
‘Forget it,’ snapped Gill. All friendliness had drained from her voice. ‘I don’t want to talk about it. Now move. Work to do.’
‘It’s just that me and my friend Gabby do exactly the same thing!’ Barney pressed on excitedly. ‘We have a club called Geek Inc. We love investigating strange happenings.
Are all the things written down here true? Can I show the papers to Gabby? She’d love to see them.’
‘No. Just throw everything out.’ Gill turned her back to him, the walker rattling in her hands. ‘Can’t have this old junk cluttering up the house.’
‘We spoke to Fiona Cress,’ said Barney. ‘She told us about the backwards robot. And about . . .
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