The Junkyard Boys by SH Richardson Page B

to address me again.
    “Alright mom, take it easy with that thing. Clover, you need to spill right now, girl, and tell me that your Range is the Range I hope he is.” I could not for the life of me understand her excitement over this whole thing. It wasn’t like they ever gave a shit about me, or whom I went out with. The two of them usually huddled together, whispering their bullshit secrets, not bothering to include me in any of it. If they were so concerned about my feelings getting hurt, they would stop calling me M&M and start treating me like I’m a part of this family. Something I’d learned from Range these past two weeks was that he cared about my opinion and didn’t make fun of me like it was a national pastime. I turned my back to them and began to make my morning coffee as usual. “Yes, Shelly, it’s Range Reardon. Happy now?”
    This time the clapping came from Ashley before she reached over and gave Shelly a high five and a fist bump. These two must have been smoking something this morning with their breakfast, ‘cause they were acting crazy as hell right now.
    “I told you it was him! Holy shit, Clove, you hit the mother lode with that one. Remember my friend Janice from Hooters?” She had to be kidding me with this shit right now. What did her job at Hooters have to do with Range? I gave her one of my hardest eye rolls to date, and believe me, there were plenty to compare it to.
    “Oh, you mean the job you worked at for two days and quit? Yeah, I remember it. Why?”
    “Well, Janice used to talk about this guy Range she went to high school with all the time, or at least for the two days I worked there. She would go on and on about wishing she had another chance to fu…I mean sleep with him again and how he was the best she ever had.”
    Her quick correction didn’t save her from getting her own rag slap from my mother. She was lucky it was just a rag she got hit with, ‘cause I wanted to knock her over the head with the coffee pot. Range was the handsomest guy I had ever met, so I never thought he was a virgin, but for Christ sake, I didn’t want to hear about his sexual exploits from some bitch that worked at Hooters of all things. How could she possibly still be obsessed over something that happened years ago, and in high school no less? This conversation was quickly going into a direction I didn’t want to take it in.
    “Well, that’s nice of her to remember something that happened when The Backstreet Boys were still together. I guess when you aspire to be shift manager at Hooters, it leaves plenty of time for reminiscing about the good old days.”
    “Oh, come on, Clove. Don’t get all bent out of shape. I only meant that since you’ve been going through a dry spell, you certainly picked the right guy to bring you out of your little funk.”
    “What funk are you talking about? I haven’t been in a funk. I simply chose to not date for a while, unlike you two, who have a full dance card.”
    I didn’t know why I was bothering to explain anything to these two. They were staring at me like I just hurt their feelings or something. My mother wasn’t much better with her disapproving scowl, like I was the one who constantly teased and humiliated them on a daily basis. “Look, it’s not like that between Range and I. We just started spending time together, and I’m not sure how to categorize our relationship yet. I’m just gonna play it by ear and see where it leads. Now, you can all find something else to come up with to tease me about.”
    There, I’d finally said it out loud. I was sick of being the punch line around here and it was time they all knew it. Strangely, I didn’t feel the satisfaction I thought I would. To my surprise, Shelly and Ashley truly looked like they had no idea what I was talking about. They were just shaking their heads and patting each other on the back in comfort. “Don’t tell me you have no idea what I’m talking about. You guys never include me in