sunshine, seeing his blue eyes. Letting go, I
finally emerge in the cold chambers of the hospital. I watch the beauty queen
pour a glass of water. She carries it with a tight grip over to the side of
the bed.
“Drink
this.”
The
restraints hold my wrist in their tight jaws. She pushes the straw up to my
lips while I take a sip. The liquid tastes cool as it rinses the grit off my
teeth. Pushing the hair back from my forehead, she looks at the cut.
“You need
stitches in that. If you want, I can take care of it.”
My eyes
grow wide at the mere thought of her offer. When I fail to respond, she pulls
up a chair next to the bed. Faint black smears rest just below her perfect,
blue eyes. I follow the outline of her face down to her blue scrubs. She has
a pin close to the top with tiny kittens playing with tiny balls of yarn.
“Are…”
The sound crackles in my throat. “Are you working today?”
“I was
this mornin’.”
“And
now?” I squint in her direction feeling the painful glow of the florescent
lights.
“Well, I
was leavin’ when I found you in the hall. So I stayed. Thought you needed
some company.”
Blinking
back at her odd statement, I lift my hand up to rub the tension behind my
eyes. The restraints keep my fingers in place. An IV snakes out from the tape
in the center of my left hand.
“I want
them off,” I beg to her.
“Try to
be still,” she smiles, though something resembling sadness lingers in the
hollow depths of her lips. “I’ll turn off the lights.”
The room
slips into darkness except the faint glow of the moon. It was daylight when I
came to the hospital. The warm summer day had become night. The world kept turning
even when I wanted it to stop.
I hurt.
I hurt so deep inside. Two tears roll over my cheeks, soaking into the fabric
of the pillow. With my hands in the cuffs, I can’t even wipe them away. I
feel the soft fabric of a tissue dab at the corners. The blonde face stares
down at me, the dark smudges appearing more prominent under each of her
lashes. In that moment, I knew the beauty queen was crying too.
Chapter 11
When
I was ten…
After we
dropped my mother in the ground, life had continued on without her. The
Tanners traveled on a path across Sprayberry paved with Mason dollars. The
closer we got, the more indebted we became to the family. My father took
everything they offered without batting an eyelash.
On the
other hand, I let myself be pulled in by Jess. The broken, leftover shell of a
girl felt bright and shiny whenever he stepped in a room. One look into those
blue eyes and I did whatever his scheming mind conjured up for us. We did
everything together and couldn’t be closer if our legs were bound tight with an
actual rope.
Just like
tonight when Mrs. Mason took us to the annual Arlis Fair. We laughed and ate
our way through the whole place. I looked down at the photo strip clasped in my
hand. One of the clubs had an old-timey photo booth. As we walked past, I saw
the costumes hanging from the rack. Jess refused until he saw the sword
dangling from a hook. He couldn’t say no to being a pirate.
Out of
the corner of my eye, I saw Jess staring at his feet. He was still mad about
the Tilt-a-Whirl.
“I can’t
believe you puked on my boots,” he muttered. “They’re my favorites.”
“I told
you not to make me eat your corndog after I had mine and a funnel cake. I
couldn’t help it,” I glared at him. He would not blame this on me.
“I’m not
seein’ corndogs on ‘em. They’re stained blue from all your cotton candy. You
ate three bags!” Jess crossed his arms and wrinkled up his eyebrows.
“You made
me go on the Tilt-a-Whirl. I told you I felt sick. But nooo!” My voice
grew louder. “ You just had to ride it. Again! ”
“Well you
made us take those stupid pictures and…”
“Enough,
you
finally emerge in the cold chambers of the hospital. I watch the beauty queen
pour a glass of water. She carries it with a tight grip over to the side of
the bed.
“Drink
this.”
The
restraints hold my wrist in their tight jaws. She pushes the straw up to my
lips while I take a sip. The liquid tastes cool as it rinses the grit off my
teeth. Pushing the hair back from my forehead, she looks at the cut.
“You need
stitches in that. If you want, I can take care of it.”
My eyes
grow wide at the mere thought of her offer. When I fail to respond, she pulls
up a chair next to the bed. Faint black smears rest just below her perfect,
blue eyes. I follow the outline of her face down to her blue scrubs. She has
a pin close to the top with tiny kittens playing with tiny balls of yarn.
“Are…”
The sound crackles in my throat. “Are you working today?”
“I was
this mornin’.”
“And
now?” I squint in her direction feeling the painful glow of the florescent
lights.
“Well, I
was leavin’ when I found you in the hall. So I stayed. Thought you needed
some company.”
Blinking
back at her odd statement, I lift my hand up to rub the tension behind my
eyes. The restraints keep my fingers in place. An IV snakes out from the tape
in the center of my left hand.
“I want
them off,” I beg to her.
“Try to
be still,” she smiles, though something resembling sadness lingers in the
hollow depths of her lips. “I’ll turn off the lights.”
The room
slips into darkness except the faint glow of the moon. It was daylight when I
came to the hospital. The warm summer day had become night. The world kept turning
even when I wanted it to stop.
I hurt.
I hurt so deep inside. Two tears roll over my cheeks, soaking into the fabric
of the pillow. With my hands in the cuffs, I can’t even wipe them away. I
feel the soft fabric of a tissue dab at the corners. The blonde face stares
down at me, the dark smudges appearing more prominent under each of her
lashes. In that moment, I knew the beauty queen was crying too.
Chapter 11
When
I was ten…
After we
dropped my mother in the ground, life had continued on without her. The
Tanners traveled on a path across Sprayberry paved with Mason dollars. The
closer we got, the more indebted we became to the family. My father took
everything they offered without batting an eyelash.
On the
other hand, I let myself be pulled in by Jess. The broken, leftover shell of a
girl felt bright and shiny whenever he stepped in a room. One look into those
blue eyes and I did whatever his scheming mind conjured up for us. We did
everything together and couldn’t be closer if our legs were bound tight with an
actual rope.
Just like
tonight when Mrs. Mason took us to the annual Arlis Fair. We laughed and ate
our way through the whole place. I looked down at the photo strip clasped in my
hand. One of the clubs had an old-timey photo booth. As we walked past, I saw
the costumes hanging from the rack. Jess refused until he saw the sword
dangling from a hook. He couldn’t say no to being a pirate.
Out of
the corner of my eye, I saw Jess staring at his feet. He was still mad about
the Tilt-a-Whirl.
“I can’t
believe you puked on my boots,” he muttered. “They’re my favorites.”
“I told
you not to make me eat your corndog after I had mine and a funnel cake. I
couldn’t help it,” I glared at him. He would not blame this on me.
“I’m not
seein’ corndogs on ‘em. They’re stained blue from all your cotton candy. You
ate three bags!” Jess crossed his arms and wrinkled up his eyebrows.
“You made
me go on the Tilt-a-Whirl. I told you I felt sick. But nooo!” My voice
grew louder. “ You just had to ride it. Again! ”
“Well you
made us take those stupid pictures and…”
“Enough,
you
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