The One Hundredth Thing About Caroline

The One Hundredth Thing About Caroline by Lois Lowry Page A

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Authors: Lois Lowry
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bank."
    The maid came in and took away the shrimp plates. Caroline was the only one who had eaten all of her shrimp. Sadly she watched the uneaten shrimp disappear, heading for the kitchen. She hoped the maid would get to eat them.
    Mr. Baurichter stood up, picked up the wine bottle, and added wine to his wife's glass and then his own. He made them just half full again.
    "I find it remarkable," he said, "how many women are entering banking these days. It used to be a male-dominated profession, like law and medicine. Now the vice-president of my bank is a woman, and—"
    "Mr. Baurichter," interrupted Caroline. Even though she knew it was rude to interrupt, she wanted to set the record straight. "My mother's only a bank teller. She's not really what you would call a
banker.
"
    "Caroline's family doesn't have much money," Stacy explained matter-of-factly. "She and her brother both have full scholarships at school. And they're practically the smartest kids in the whole school, even though Caroline's lousy at math."
    "Well, good for you, Caroline!" said Mr. Baurichter. "Tell me, do you have any idea what you want to be when you grow up?"
    Most kids hated it when grownups asked that. But
Caroline didn't mind. It sounded as if Mr. Baurichter was really interested.
    "Yes," she said proudly. "I'm going to be a vertebrate paleontologist."
    " KID DIGS PALEOLITHIC AGE ," headlined Stacy.
    "Actually," explained Caroline politely, "it's the Mesozoic Era that interests me most."
    The maid brought in plates of steak. Sizzling, juicy, thick. Paradise, thought Caroline.
    "Goodness," said Mrs. Baurichter, "you certainly live in the perfect place, then, over near the Museum of Natural History."
    "Yes." Caroline grinned and picked up her steak knife. "I spend a lot of time there."
    "You know," said Stacy suddenly, "even though you said all those creative people live on the West Side, we have a writer here in our own building. Harrison Ledyard."
    Mrs. Baurichter groaned; a tasteful, quiet sort of groan.
    "That man," she said, "is a complete bore."
    The maid had appeared again and was coming around to each place. She was putting something down in front of each person. It was something weird. Caroline watched. Maybe it was some strange sort of decoration. Each one was a huge, fat, gray-green
thing
with what looked like leaves all over it. Looking out of the corner of her eye, Caroline saw that each of
them—Mr. Baurichter, Mrs. Baurichter, and Stacy—was reaching for the thing. With their
fingers.
    "What do you mean, a bore?" asked Stacy. "I didn't even know you knew him."
    "We went to a cocktail party at his apartment last week," her mother explained. Caroline watched in amazement as she removed a piece of the giant gray-green object, dipped it into a sauce, and then—yes—actually put it into her mouth. Stacy was doing the same thing. She was doing it as if it were no big deal; as if it were a casual, everyday event to
eat
a huge, gross, leafy
thing.
    Mrs. Baurichter went on. "He had a party to celebrate his marriage. So we went and met his new wife, who was actually rather charming—though somewhat out of her element, I think. She's from the Midwest. I'm sorry, Caroline, I know you said your father lives in Des Moines. I didn't mean to disparage the Midwest."
    Caroline wasn't even listening. She chewed her steak slowly, watching them actually
eat
those nauseating things. And hers was still sitting there in front of her. She focused all her mental powers on it, willing it to disappear. But it stayed right there.
    "But
he
is a crashing, colossal bore. Wouldn't you say so, Paul?"
    Mr. Baurichter nodded his head in agreement. Caroline glanced at Stacy. Stacy had stopped eating altogether. No wonder, thought Caroline. She finally came to her senses and realized that she had been chewing on a repulsive
object.
    "We had to listen to him tell all about his work, which, frankly, was terribly dull, and then he told all about his

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