Sam and I since we were 11 — Quentin a little longer. They know how close we are and all that we
went through together. They have the
right to be sympathetic to my pain.
“So tell me how things are going. I haven’t talked to either of you in a long
time.” I finally have gotten myself under control again. The ball is still there applying pressure to
my rib cage, but I’m able to keep it down.
For now.
“It’s great. Fresno State is awesome.” Quentin answers quickly, thankful for a change
of subject.
“That’s good,” I reply. “Anyone we know go there
besides you two?”
Another shared look between the two of them and my
ball is rattling the cage again.
“Katelyn Price,” Arianna says quietly.
Katelyn’s name still affects me, even to this
day. My breath hitches and my heart
skips a single beat.
After all these years, she still has that effect
on me.
Katelyn Price, my one regret .
“Does she know about this?” I ask, maybe a little
too hopeful. Arianna shakes her head no.
“We haven’t told her yet,” she adds.
“Wait for a while. She might not even come.” She nods her understanding. Kate and I didn’t exactly end on good
terms. She never talked to me again
after the epic graduation blow out we had.
I have no one to blame but myself though.
Rapidly, my arm starts to ache as if in response
to our conversation. They told me that
the pain can be intense, they weren’t kidding. This is pain. I hit the red call
button and a middle-aged nurse walks in.
“You okay?” Stupid question, but I let it slide
since the pain in my arm is keeping the flames in my chest at bay.
“My arm hurts a lot,” I tell her and she nods as
she goes to get my painkillers. Arianna
looks at me with concern.
“That happen a lot?” she asks me. I nod my head as the nurse returns. Immediately, the pain starts to subside. Arianna looks at Quentin as I start to close
my eyes.
“Maybe we should go now.” I try to open my eyes,
but the pain medicine is making me groggy and it’s very difficult to do. I do manage to see Quentin nod before they
close completely.
I barely register the door closing in the pitch
black behind my lids.
Chapter Nine
5 Years Ago (Age 15): February
My brother, James, decided to celebrate his
leave — he joined the Marines shortly after graduating and just got finished
with basic and MCT — by dragging me and my friends to The Sidetrack, a local,
all-ages nightclub. Anyone 16 and older
can enter. I was able to get in because
my brother has been friends with the front bouncer for years. The music is overwhelmingly loud and the
people are completely lost in their own little worlds. The DJ is actually pretty good and I even
find myself moving to the music despite the crappy mood I’m in. Girls already surround Ethan and Arianna is
moving on the dance floor — she has her own little group of guys already. Quentin is trying hard not to look at
them. Arianna is almost like the female
version of Ethan; this is their element, not mine.
The only one not here is Sam. Unfortunately, she has another obligation
that she’d rather be at than being here with me — us.
“Jesus, you’re depressing tonight,” my brother
chides, “just get over her and try to enjoy yourself.”
“Easier said than done.”
“Whatever. Call me when you need a ride from the pity party, I’m going to the
back.” My brother disappears into the back of the club yelling something like
“ladies.” He thinks he’s a ladies’ man,
only some of the time is it true. The
last third of the building is the 21 and over side. They have a bar, a few couches, and some
tables. The dance floor is in the middle
between The Virgin side and The Back side.
He’s left me all on my own.
I’ve never been here before, but I know that
Sam and I have been talking about coming here. She came here last weekend
went through together. They have the
right to be sympathetic to my pain.
“So tell me how things are going. I haven’t talked to either of you in a long
time.” I finally have gotten myself under control again. The ball is still there applying pressure to
my rib cage, but I’m able to keep it down.
For now.
“It’s great. Fresno State is awesome.” Quentin answers quickly, thankful for a change
of subject.
“That’s good,” I reply. “Anyone we know go there
besides you two?”
Another shared look between the two of them and my
ball is rattling the cage again.
“Katelyn Price,” Arianna says quietly.
Katelyn’s name still affects me, even to this
day. My breath hitches and my heart
skips a single beat.
After all these years, she still has that effect
on me.
Katelyn Price, my one regret .
“Does she know about this?” I ask, maybe a little
too hopeful. Arianna shakes her head no.
“We haven’t told her yet,” she adds.
“Wait for a while. She might not even come.” She nods her understanding. Kate and I didn’t exactly end on good
terms. She never talked to me again
after the epic graduation blow out we had.
I have no one to blame but myself though.
Rapidly, my arm starts to ache as if in response
to our conversation. They told me that
the pain can be intense, they weren’t kidding. This is pain. I hit the red call
button and a middle-aged nurse walks in.
“You okay?” Stupid question, but I let it slide
since the pain in my arm is keeping the flames in my chest at bay.
“My arm hurts a lot,” I tell her and she nods as
she goes to get my painkillers. Arianna
looks at me with concern.
“That happen a lot?” she asks me. I nod my head as the nurse returns. Immediately, the pain starts to subside. Arianna looks at Quentin as I start to close
my eyes.
“Maybe we should go now.” I try to open my eyes,
but the pain medicine is making me groggy and it’s very difficult to do. I do manage to see Quentin nod before they
close completely.
I barely register the door closing in the pitch
black behind my lids.
Chapter Nine
5 Years Ago (Age 15): February
My brother, James, decided to celebrate his
leave — he joined the Marines shortly after graduating and just got finished
with basic and MCT — by dragging me and my friends to The Sidetrack, a local,
all-ages nightclub. Anyone 16 and older
can enter. I was able to get in because
my brother has been friends with the front bouncer for years. The music is overwhelmingly loud and the
people are completely lost in their own little worlds. The DJ is actually pretty good and I even
find myself moving to the music despite the crappy mood I’m in. Girls already surround Ethan and Arianna is
moving on the dance floor — she has her own little group of guys already. Quentin is trying hard not to look at
them. Arianna is almost like the female
version of Ethan; this is their element, not mine.
The only one not here is Sam. Unfortunately, she has another obligation
that she’d rather be at than being here with me — us.
“Jesus, you’re depressing tonight,” my brother
chides, “just get over her and try to enjoy yourself.”
“Easier said than done.”
“Whatever. Call me when you need a ride from the pity party, I’m going to the
back.” My brother disappears into the back of the club yelling something like
“ladies.” He thinks he’s a ladies’ man,
only some of the time is it true. The
last third of the building is the 21 and over side. They have a bar, a few couches, and some
tables. The dance floor is in the middle
between The Virgin side and The Back side.
He’s left me all on my own.
I’ve never been here before, but I know that
Sam and I have been talking about coming here. She came here last weekend
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