aching with an emptiness that begged to be filled.
By Calam.
She didn’t even know what she wanted from him.
She had come to the Midnight Playground knowing exactly what she wanted. The vampires. Eternal life. But being with Calam was changing everything somehow. She no longer knew what she wanted. Or, she doubted what she’d known. Because right now, the only thing she could think of was Calam. Her human lover. A man whose existence was finite. A man she could lose. Grieve over.
Never again .
She took a deep breath, tried to calm herself. After all, he was there with her, holding her still. She could feel his every breath. Could smell the scent of his skin all around her.
Calm yourself.
She pulled in another breath, along with the scent of him. Of sex. Of the two of them together.
She couldn’t lose what she didn’t have for more than this moment. There were no promises hanging in the air. Just the two of them, the sex, in this unusual situation. A situation in which they both ultimately wanted something neither could give the other—the gift of eternal life that could only come from their vampire lovers.
Perhaps Luka or Konstantine would offer her the Turning Kiss. And if they did, she would have to leave Calam behind in the human realm. Unless they offered it to him as well.
She knew the rules—no new vampire could Turn a human until they had been immortal for ten years. By then, Calam would be too old to qualify.
The tears were back, making her throat tight. She pressed her head to Calam’s broad chest, listened to the beating of his heart. And for the first time, life seemed suddenly precious to her. Because it was Calam’s life she considered.
What was happening to her? She couldn’t figure it out. But as Calam’s arms tightened around her, and he kissed her hair, she let herself forget the unfamiliar ideas wandering through her mind. Let herself drift with him, while the moon rose high in the night sky, and she dreamed of the two of them, lying in each other’s arms in a summer field of harvested wheat.
When she woke Luka was there, sitting in a plush, high-backed damask settee, drinking a glass of wine. He was dressed in his black leather pants and a leather vest, leaving his leanly muscled chest and arms bare. His skin gleamed a pale gold in the light of a lamp and the misty moon glow coming through the curtains. Calam was sleeping beside her, his breathing even.
“Ah, you are awake. Did you sleep well?” Luka asked her.
“Yes, very well.”
“Being well used, well loved, always makes one sleep easily.”
“Yes.” She smiled, remembering Calam making love to her.
Making love.
When had she ever thought of sex in those terms?
She pushed her hair from her face. She had been too easily rattled in the last few days. Too emotional. She wasn’t used to it.
“The two of you have something special together,” Luka remarked.
“I…I don’t know…”
The vampire smiled, his eyeteeth catching the lamplight. “I do. I could read you even if I were human. You and Calam.”
“Luka…”
“It’s all right with me. With Konstantine. We are still considering you. Both of you.”
“What?”
His smile broadened. “Come and sit with me, Ilana. We will talk.”
She sat up, shivered a little in the cool air as the sheet slid from her body, as she moved away from Calam’s heat. Luka was at her side instantly, in that graceful speed only the immortals possessed. He was holding a silk robe in a deep garnet red, slipping it over her shoulders. He led her back to the settee.
“Do you need food?” he asked her as she settled onto the cushions. “Something to drink?”
“Wine would be lovely.”
He picked up the decanter sitting on a gorgeously carved side table next to him, poured some of the dark red liquid into a crystal glass, handed it to her. “It will help restore you. Ever keeps the very best here in the private quarters, and he has it infused with herbs for
By Calam.
She didn’t even know what she wanted from him.
She had come to the Midnight Playground knowing exactly what she wanted. The vampires. Eternal life. But being with Calam was changing everything somehow. She no longer knew what she wanted. Or, she doubted what she’d known. Because right now, the only thing she could think of was Calam. Her human lover. A man whose existence was finite. A man she could lose. Grieve over.
Never again .
She took a deep breath, tried to calm herself. After all, he was there with her, holding her still. She could feel his every breath. Could smell the scent of his skin all around her.
Calm yourself.
She pulled in another breath, along with the scent of him. Of sex. Of the two of them together.
She couldn’t lose what she didn’t have for more than this moment. There were no promises hanging in the air. Just the two of them, the sex, in this unusual situation. A situation in which they both ultimately wanted something neither could give the other—the gift of eternal life that could only come from their vampire lovers.
Perhaps Luka or Konstantine would offer her the Turning Kiss. And if they did, she would have to leave Calam behind in the human realm. Unless they offered it to him as well.
She knew the rules—no new vampire could Turn a human until they had been immortal for ten years. By then, Calam would be too old to qualify.
The tears were back, making her throat tight. She pressed her head to Calam’s broad chest, listened to the beating of his heart. And for the first time, life seemed suddenly precious to her. Because it was Calam’s life she considered.
What was happening to her? She couldn’t figure it out. But as Calam’s arms tightened around her, and he kissed her hair, she let herself forget the unfamiliar ideas wandering through her mind. Let herself drift with him, while the moon rose high in the night sky, and she dreamed of the two of them, lying in each other’s arms in a summer field of harvested wheat.
When she woke Luka was there, sitting in a plush, high-backed damask settee, drinking a glass of wine. He was dressed in his black leather pants and a leather vest, leaving his leanly muscled chest and arms bare. His skin gleamed a pale gold in the light of a lamp and the misty moon glow coming through the curtains. Calam was sleeping beside her, his breathing even.
“Ah, you are awake. Did you sleep well?” Luka asked her.
“Yes, very well.”
“Being well used, well loved, always makes one sleep easily.”
“Yes.” She smiled, remembering Calam making love to her.
Making love.
When had she ever thought of sex in those terms?
She pushed her hair from her face. She had been too easily rattled in the last few days. Too emotional. She wasn’t used to it.
“The two of you have something special together,” Luka remarked.
“I…I don’t know…”
The vampire smiled, his eyeteeth catching the lamplight. “I do. I could read you even if I were human. You and Calam.”
“Luka…”
“It’s all right with me. With Konstantine. We are still considering you. Both of you.”
“What?”
His smile broadened. “Come and sit with me, Ilana. We will talk.”
She sat up, shivered a little in the cool air as the sheet slid from her body, as she moved away from Calam’s heat. Luka was at her side instantly, in that graceful speed only the immortals possessed. He was holding a silk robe in a deep garnet red, slipping it over her shoulders. He led her back to the settee.
“Do you need food?” he asked her as she settled onto the cushions. “Something to drink?”
“Wine would be lovely.”
He picked up the decanter sitting on a gorgeously carved side table next to him, poured some of the dark red liquid into a crystal glass, handed it to her. “It will help restore you. Ever keeps the very best here in the private quarters, and he has it infused with herbs for
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