Things No One Will Tell Fat Girls by Jes Baker

breathing when hiking up mountainsor stairs. And the worst part was that I felt like there was no way out. I felt like the importance of health in relation to worthiness was inarguable and that it wasn’t in any way unreasonable for others to expect me to obsess about it also.
    I used to watch other fat activists post pictures of delicious s’mores and coffee that they found in a Bay Area café. Or write about a party they went to and how amazing the food was. Or mention how awesome pizza was in general. I was floored by their openness about their enjoyment of “unhealthy food” (and honestly, food in general), and, years into my activism, I still thought, “I could never do that.” I thought they were so brave.
    The reality? They know that our beauty ideal evolves with every standard we shatter. They realize that a new one arrives just as we find self-love in a new way. They get that the obsession with proving and glorifying health and fitness is just another way to regulate people and hinder self-esteem. Those activists weren’t just brave. They were smart. Smart and onto the scam of obsessive health presented as a way to keep us all in line. I’ve got some serious RESPECT for those rad bitches.
    Now, in addition to that focal point, other aspects of the original beauty ideal have shifted significantly in recent years. Namely, the subject of cisgender men and their body image issues. Naomi Wolf says in her updated introduction to The Beauty Myth that between 1990 and 2002 she watched the male body image market grow by leaps and bounds. Men are now increasingly targeted with anxiety-creating marketing formed around pure profit. “Men of all ages, economic backgrounds, and sexual orientations are more worried [about their appearance]—some a bit, others more substantially—than they were just ten years ago.” 7 And this has continued to gain momentum since Wolf’s update. In fact, since 2012, “beauty products” targeted at men have increased by 70 percent and men’s “personal care” has become the fastest growing segment of the beauty industry—earning over four billion dollars in 2014. 8 This obsession with perfecting the male body isn’t good by any means, but there is something else about this situation that REALLYconcerns me. As women, we are now demanding and commandeering space to discuss and confront body images issues, and YAY, here’s a book on it for chrissakes! But men? Because our culture now glorifies (white) strong, healthy, muscular, and “unbreakable” MEN, body pressure now affects them, too. But because of the focus on “manliness” and masculinity, guys are completely discouraged from talking about it.
    Because women’s economic and social power has increased over the years, men’s old self-esteem standby of accumulating power and prestige through traditional and patriarchal means has started to diminish. This leaves men more vulnerable and in search of other ways to build confidence and worth. Cue men’s health and fashion magazines, cosmetic surgery, Viagra sales, and, of course, eating disorders. Men are bullied, too. Men are taught to hate their midsections, too. Men are taught that they need to improve XYZ as well. But they are also told to “shake it off” and “man up” instead of addressing these traumatizing situations. Quite frankly, y’all, there is nothing more terrifying to me than complete silence when it comes to social injustice issues. Male body image issues may be “newly emerging” in comparison to the female beauty myth, but they are no less important than those of others. I can only hope that we as a society can work toward opening a safe space where these issues can be aired, processed, and then addressed.
    It’s really important to acknowledge that the beauty ideal will continue to evolve, change, and keep individuals imprisoned within