the barrier of isolation that he forged around me, and finally finding my voice, I screamed out for him to stop, but most importantly, for her to leave.
“Darlin’,” Walker’s voice called out to me softly, urging me back to the here and now. I may have been lost in my vacant vision, but I could still make out that he was squatting before me as I rested on the edge of the old, brown sofa, rocking gently. “Kady,” he whispered.
Despite my hand burning and the soreness radiating through my fingers, I couldn’t halt the repetition of the simple up and down motions of dragging nails. I never had control with Him, and irrespective of his demonic manifestation in my head, torturing me with sadistic, malevolent ways, I still felt that lack of control. The moment soon came where my darkened thoughts were cast down a darker path, and I longed to use something sharper and more wounding than my fingernails. Removing myself from turmoil would be easy, I knew that. Yet in doing so, the fact that He would be the cause of my act of sheer desperation, once again gave him control over me. Gradually, I began to retreat from my world of precarious thoughts and became more aware of the happenings around my physical body. Nevertheless, it still felt alien going against something so natural, so instinctive, like telling a dog not to dig in the yard. I realized, in that moment, that I was beginning to understand Walker’s troubles and his concern over our matching need for emotional release, more so.
Warm hands parted my own, bringing an end to the chasm I was forging in the back of my hand. “It’s okay, darlin’. I’m here,” he spoke his words softly, teeming with so much assurance and understanding that my eyes were stinging with moisture, while my brow crumpled. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, his eyebrows meeting his hairline.
“I…I…”
“Another nightmare?”
I nodded with a small sniffle then hung my head, apologetic. “I didn’t want to wake you.”
“Hey,” he sighed, shunting himself from his crouched position. Taking the seat to my right, I was pulled into his arms, my head rested on his chest as I surrendered to my despair. “It’ll be okay, Kady. I’m here; no one is going to hurt you. Not again, I won’t allow it.” He kissed the top of my head before his cheek rested where his lips had just been. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“I don’t think there’s anything to say. It…he…” Why was it so hard to explain my feelings? It was as though I was hypnotized––the mere mention of His name, a thought, his face flashing through my mind and I was back to being the woman who justified it, who allowed herself to believe his ‘ pie-crust promises’ , as my Grandmother would have said. Easily made, easily broken.
Broken…I am broken. He did it to me, and I allowed him to without so much as putting up a fight.
Liam DeLaney was an alpha male, that, I knew. Time after time again I bowed to him because that was what I thought he deserved. He took his power often when given, but over time, it wasn’t merely enough for him. The monster’s obsession with gaining control had driven the man to cause fear through his alpha standing. The truth was: he was abusive, a woman beater, and a control freak. If after five long years together I never stood a chance, then neither will Liv.
Liv…
How could she have done that to me?
Minutes which felt like hours passed with us sitting on the sofa, watching the ray of sunlight burn through the old window to the right of us, lighting the air and displaying the lint particles floating weightlessly through the room. It was relaxing. Upon Walker’s shoulder, my head lifting and falling rhythmically, my fingers traced the border of scalded flesh, and for the first time all morning, I managed to push Him out of my mind.
“What time is your appointment?”
“1:20 p.m.”
“Kady,” he shifted beneath me. The grave undertone of his voice
“Darlin’,” Walker’s voice called out to me softly, urging me back to the here and now. I may have been lost in my vacant vision, but I could still make out that he was squatting before me as I rested on the edge of the old, brown sofa, rocking gently. “Kady,” he whispered.
Despite my hand burning and the soreness radiating through my fingers, I couldn’t halt the repetition of the simple up and down motions of dragging nails. I never had control with Him, and irrespective of his demonic manifestation in my head, torturing me with sadistic, malevolent ways, I still felt that lack of control. The moment soon came where my darkened thoughts were cast down a darker path, and I longed to use something sharper and more wounding than my fingernails. Removing myself from turmoil would be easy, I knew that. Yet in doing so, the fact that He would be the cause of my act of sheer desperation, once again gave him control over me. Gradually, I began to retreat from my world of precarious thoughts and became more aware of the happenings around my physical body. Nevertheless, it still felt alien going against something so natural, so instinctive, like telling a dog not to dig in the yard. I realized, in that moment, that I was beginning to understand Walker’s troubles and his concern over our matching need for emotional release, more so.
Warm hands parted my own, bringing an end to the chasm I was forging in the back of my hand. “It’s okay, darlin’. I’m here,” he spoke his words softly, teeming with so much assurance and understanding that my eyes were stinging with moisture, while my brow crumpled. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, his eyebrows meeting his hairline.
“I…I…”
“Another nightmare?”
I nodded with a small sniffle then hung my head, apologetic. “I didn’t want to wake you.”
“Hey,” he sighed, shunting himself from his crouched position. Taking the seat to my right, I was pulled into his arms, my head rested on his chest as I surrendered to my despair. “It’ll be okay, Kady. I’m here; no one is going to hurt you. Not again, I won’t allow it.” He kissed the top of my head before his cheek rested where his lips had just been. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“I don’t think there’s anything to say. It…he…” Why was it so hard to explain my feelings? It was as though I was hypnotized––the mere mention of His name, a thought, his face flashing through my mind and I was back to being the woman who justified it, who allowed herself to believe his ‘ pie-crust promises’ , as my Grandmother would have said. Easily made, easily broken.
Broken…I am broken. He did it to me, and I allowed him to without so much as putting up a fight.
Liam DeLaney was an alpha male, that, I knew. Time after time again I bowed to him because that was what I thought he deserved. He took his power often when given, but over time, it wasn’t merely enough for him. The monster’s obsession with gaining control had driven the man to cause fear through his alpha standing. The truth was: he was abusive, a woman beater, and a control freak. If after five long years together I never stood a chance, then neither will Liv.
Liv…
How could she have done that to me?
Minutes which felt like hours passed with us sitting on the sofa, watching the ray of sunlight burn through the old window to the right of us, lighting the air and displaying the lint particles floating weightlessly through the room. It was relaxing. Upon Walker’s shoulder, my head lifting and falling rhythmically, my fingers traced the border of scalded flesh, and for the first time all morning, I managed to push Him out of my mind.
“What time is your appointment?”
“1:20 p.m.”
“Kady,” he shifted beneath me. The grave undertone of his voice
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