Uncle John’s Slightly Irregular Bathroom Reader by Bathroom Readers’ Institute Page A

of hyperpigmentation—the buildup of excess pigment in patches of the skin. Liver spots have nothing to do with the liver; they most often result from a lifetime of exposure to sunlight. Other possible causes include surgery, pregnancy, and some medications.” (From The New York Times Second Book of Science Questions and Answers , by C. Claiborne Ray)
    BAD TASTE
    Q: Why does orange juice taste so bad after you brush your teeth?
    A: “The detergent used in most toothpastes—sodium lauryl sulfate—temporarily modifies the taste system, according to Dr. John DeSimone of Virginia Commonwealth University. It reduces your ability to taste sweetness and saltiness, and makes sour foods intensely bitter. Right after brushing, anything will taste less sweet. Don’t worry, though: the reaction won’t harm you.” (From Newsweek )
    Minimum wage in 1950: 75¢ an hour.
    DRY YOUR EYE
    Q: Why do we have eyebrows?
    A: “We have eyebrows for two reasons. The first is to keep water from running into your eyes. Your forehead can perspire more than other parts of the body. Perspiration is salty, and if you didn’t have eyebrows it would run into your eyes and cause them to smart. If it is raining hard, water running off your head and down your forehead is stopped by the eyebrows so the water doesn’t get into your eyes and hamper your vision. You’ll also notice that the bone under your eyebrows sticks out slightly. If you bump that bone, the eyebrows soften the blow to prevent damage to the bone. It is believed that early humans had much thicker eyebrows to provide more padding.” (From What Makes Flamingos Pink? , by Bill McLain)
    GESUNDHEIT!
    Q: Why do you close your eyes when you sneeze?
    A: “It’s a reflex thing. Your eyes snap shut as soon as you sneeze, and it’s pretty much impossible to keep them open. The nerves serving the eyes and the nose are very closely connected. The stimuli to one often trigger some response in the other. There’s an urban myth that if you keep your eyes open when you sneeze, your eyes will pop out. Well, you can’t do it, and even if you could, it wouldn’t happen.” (From Return of the Answer Lady , by Marg Meikle.)
    LEAKY PIPES
    Q: Why does running water make you have to go to the bathroom?
    A: “Scientists say it’s the power of suggestion. It’s totally psychological. The sound of going to the bathroom is very similar to the sound of water filling a sink. The brain hears water running and connects it with the need to urinate, so it sends a message to the bladder telling it that it’s full, even if it isn’t. The phenomenon even occurs in dogs.” (From Why Knuckles Crack and Other Body Facts , by Jeremy M. Barker)
    The cold truth: Scientists say you have more nightmares when your bedroom is cold.

KIND OF KINKY
    What do Bill Clinton and George W. Bush have in common? They’re both fans of Texas novelist/songwriter/satirist Kinky Friedman .
    “A happy childhood is the worst possible preparation for life.”
    “In six days the Lord created the heavens and the Earth and all the wonders therein. There are some of us who feel that He might have taken just a little more time.”
    “If you have the choice between humble and cocky, go with cocky. There’s always time to be humble later, once you’ve been proven horrendously, irrevocably wrong.”
    “I came from an upper-middle-class home, which is always a hard cross for a country singer to bear.”
    “If you’re paranoid long enough, sooner or later you’re gonna be right.”
    “The distance between the limousine and the gutter is a short one.”
    “We’re all worm bait waiting to happen. It’s what you do while you wait that matters.”
    “Seventeen publishers rejected the manuscript, at which time I knew I had something pretty hot.”
    “No matter where you go, you always see yourself in the rearview mirror.”
    “I don’t believe in carrying a weapon. If somebody wants to shoot me, he’ll have to bring his own