nods.
‘Yeah, but she didn’t want to know afterwards. I can’t say I blame her. I let everyone down.’ He looks angry again and I wish I hadn’t mentioned it. There are so many things I want to know about him, but I don’t want to seem like I’m prying. To my horror I spend the next few minutes silently seething with jealousy about his girlfriend, and wondering if she was prettier or cooler or smarter than me. Probably all three. And definitely not a virgin.
He must have read my mind, or at least sensed an atmosphere, because he leans over and squeezes my kneein a way that seems more affectionate than sexual.
‘I got over her ages ago. It would never have worked out.’
I nod and mumble something non-committal, trying not to seem too interested.
Please don’t ask me
, I pray, wishing I had never opened this particular can of worms, but of course he does.
‘How about you, no recent exes?’
‘Erm, no, not recent.’ I clear my throat, deciding not to bother lying because no doubt Dannii would have filled him in anyway. ‘In fact not any, really.’
He takes his eyes off the road for a moment to glance at me with that unreadable expression I’m quickly becoming familiar with.
‘That’s good,’ he says blandly, and I have no idea what he means. Good as in
good because I like you and I don’t want any rivals
or good as in
oh my God she’s even more inexperienced than I thought but I’d better be polite?
‘Why do you live with your aunt?’ I blurt out in a desperate attempt to change the subject and then mentally kick myself for being way too nosy yet again. He’s quiet for a few moments as he turns the car into my neighbourhood and when he speaks it’s in a monotone, as if he’s reciting answers.
‘I haven’t seen my dad in years and my mum’s dead. Cancer.’
‘I’m sorry.’ Now I feel awful, and at the same time want to throw my arms round him. I can relate to a father not being around but the thought of anything happening to my mum makes me feel ill. All of a sudden I just want to go home and hug her, before remembering she’s probably not in.
As Joe pulls up at the end of my road I sit in silence, willing him to say something and wishing I had neverasked about either his past girl or his parents. What with Dannii’s antics and now my clumsy prying, my first ever real date has been kind of a disaster.
Or maybe not. I unclip my belt and go to say ‘bye’ when he reaches for me, not in a lungey grabby way but carefully as if he thinks I’m fragile or something, stroking my cheek and then sliding his hand round the back of my neck. He leans over and my heart starts pounding as I realise he’s going to kiss me again. I’ve been waiting for this all night yet now I just sit frozen, staring at his mouth as it comes towards me in what feels like slow motion. I don’t want to throw myself at him again so when his lips touch mine I barely respond, but when his warm mouth encloses mine and his hand tightens on the back of my neck I let out a little gasp before I start kissing him back as if my lips and tongue have a will of their own.
We kiss for what feels like ages, and then I feel his other hand creeping up my ribcage. Somehow we’re now nearly lying back across the seats with him over me, his hip wedged into my thigh. It’s slightly uncomfortable and I turn, which brings his hand up right under my breast. I freeze, having a moment’s panic that he’s going to try and grope me, but he slides his hand around my breast up to my collarbone, and then down a little again, then around again, but without actually touching me.
Which makes me want him to. I arch my back, almost pushing my chest into his hand but he slides it down and away again, breaking away from the kiss to nibble at my lower lip. It’s so lovely and so weirdly frustrating all at once that I nip him back with a little more force.
‘Easy, tiger.’ He laughs, my breath warm on his neck. He kisses me again and shifts
‘Yeah, but she didn’t want to know afterwards. I can’t say I blame her. I let everyone down.’ He looks angry again and I wish I hadn’t mentioned it. There are so many things I want to know about him, but I don’t want to seem like I’m prying. To my horror I spend the next few minutes silently seething with jealousy about his girlfriend, and wondering if she was prettier or cooler or smarter than me. Probably all three. And definitely not a virgin.
He must have read my mind, or at least sensed an atmosphere, because he leans over and squeezes my kneein a way that seems more affectionate than sexual.
‘I got over her ages ago. It would never have worked out.’
I nod and mumble something non-committal, trying not to seem too interested.
Please don’t ask me
, I pray, wishing I had never opened this particular can of worms, but of course he does.
‘How about you, no recent exes?’
‘Erm, no, not recent.’ I clear my throat, deciding not to bother lying because no doubt Dannii would have filled him in anyway. ‘In fact not any, really.’
He takes his eyes off the road for a moment to glance at me with that unreadable expression I’m quickly becoming familiar with.
‘That’s good,’ he says blandly, and I have no idea what he means. Good as in
good because I like you and I don’t want any rivals
or good as in
oh my God she’s even more inexperienced than I thought but I’d better be polite?
‘Why do you live with your aunt?’ I blurt out in a desperate attempt to change the subject and then mentally kick myself for being way too nosy yet again. He’s quiet for a few moments as he turns the car into my neighbourhood and when he speaks it’s in a monotone, as if he’s reciting answers.
‘I haven’t seen my dad in years and my mum’s dead. Cancer.’
‘I’m sorry.’ Now I feel awful, and at the same time want to throw my arms round him. I can relate to a father not being around but the thought of anything happening to my mum makes me feel ill. All of a sudden I just want to go home and hug her, before remembering she’s probably not in.
As Joe pulls up at the end of my road I sit in silence, willing him to say something and wishing I had neverasked about either his past girl or his parents. What with Dannii’s antics and now my clumsy prying, my first ever real date has been kind of a disaster.
Or maybe not. I unclip my belt and go to say ‘bye’ when he reaches for me, not in a lungey grabby way but carefully as if he thinks I’m fragile or something, stroking my cheek and then sliding his hand round the back of my neck. He leans over and my heart starts pounding as I realise he’s going to kiss me again. I’ve been waiting for this all night yet now I just sit frozen, staring at his mouth as it comes towards me in what feels like slow motion. I don’t want to throw myself at him again so when his lips touch mine I barely respond, but when his warm mouth encloses mine and his hand tightens on the back of my neck I let out a little gasp before I start kissing him back as if my lips and tongue have a will of their own.
We kiss for what feels like ages, and then I feel his other hand creeping up my ribcage. Somehow we’re now nearly lying back across the seats with him over me, his hip wedged into my thigh. It’s slightly uncomfortable and I turn, which brings his hand up right under my breast. I freeze, having a moment’s panic that he’s going to try and grope me, but he slides his hand around my breast up to my collarbone, and then down a little again, then around again, but without actually touching me.
Which makes me want him to. I arch my back, almost pushing my chest into his hand but he slides it down and away again, breaking away from the kiss to nibble at my lower lip. It’s so lovely and so weirdly frustrating all at once that I nip him back with a little more force.
‘Easy, tiger.’ He laughs, my breath warm on his neck. He kisses me again and shifts
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