offensive people a lesson, and make sure they understand that socialism is a far more superior system than corrupt capitalism, and I thought that perhaps that was the moment when he came up with the seed of an idea that subsequently led to the tragic Korean War, and thought that if nothing in the world was permanent, the current capitalistic world, which seemed as if it would last permanently, wouldnât last permanently, either, and wondered what kind of a world would follow a capitalistic world, and wondered skeptically if any kind of an ideal world could indeed be ideal, and thought about certain facts regarding Hitler, who, along with Stalin, was one of the greatest dictators in history, such as the fact that he had severe mysophobia and took nine baths every day, and being fastidious about his hygiene, he always took a shower if he sweated while presiding over a meeting or giving a speechâbeing passionate and often using large gestures, he sweated quite a bit, and itâs assumed that he took a lot of showers to rid himself of the sweaty odorâand that he received nine injections a day of a hormone extracted from bull testicles in order to show off his stamina and maintain a passionate state of mindâWhy did it have to be nine baths, and nine injections of a hormone extracted from bull testicles, a day? Could such trivia serve as clues to understanding Hitler, who drove countless people to pain?âand that he didnât like smoking or drinking and issued a special order to all German officers to eat chocolate instead of smoking (did he think that eating chocolate would help them endure the hardships of war?), and didnât like cats in particular, and grew nervous and looked afraid when hehappened to see a cat, and thought about all the dictators in the world, who in themselves seemed quite fascinating, and about something that could be observed in all dictators, and wondered what that was, and also thought about something that all dictators could have thought about as they fell asleep, such as what they would have for dinner the next night, and thought that they mustâve thought about how to eliminate those who were absolutely intolerable even by their standards, although they found almost everything intolerable, and thought that all these thoughts occurred to me while I was drinking tomato juice, and thought about how much I hated all sounds that came through a loudspeaker, and wondered why Germans had no knack for humor, and saw a spot on my bedroom wallpaper that looked like a little boat at first when the wallpaper got wet in the rain, and began to look more and more like a battleship, and wondered how the spot would change in shape, and thought about the things I could mock in my heart as much as I pleased, and thought about my native language that still seemed immature as a language, and thought about how indecisive I was, and how difficult it was for me to decide on something, and how often, as a result, I went without eating all day because I couldnât decide what to eat, and thought about how much I enjoyed doing things that were meaningless in themselves and in light of something else, and wondered if Iâd ever done anything with all my heart and soul, and seeing my boy do something strange, recalled that I, too, did strange things as a boy, such as hide in a forest of owls where there was no else around, spending my time looking quietly at something or not looking at anything, and hoped that my child would do suchstrange things as well, and thought about people who spent their lives doing something I knew in advance that Iâd never be able to lose myself in, and about their lives, and thought that remembering the past didnât bring it to the present, but was like crossing an invisible, labyrinthine bridge between a certain point in the past and the present, groping the handrail, and thought about how Kafka laughed repeatedly while reading his own work and wondered
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