Want to Go Private?

Want to Go Private? by Sarah Darer Littman Page A

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Authors: Sarah Darer Littman
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CHAPTER 5
OCTOBER 6
    I log on before school the next morning to see if Luke’s online but he isn’t, and there aren’t any messages from him either. I was hoping maybe he’d write whatever he was going to say to me in an e-mail. It’s driving me crazy trying to guess.
    It’s also really distracting. I find my thoughts drifting in science and when I look down I’ve doodled Luke’s name in my notes.
Must. Concentrate
.
    Ms. Forcier’s talking about the characteristics of living things. Wait, I know this. I did the homework. She’s already listed:
    1. Made of cells
    2. Obtain and use energy
    3. Grow and develop
    4. Respond to the environment
    I scribble these down in my notes, next to all my Luke doodles.
    “Billy, what’s another characteristic of living things?” Ms. Forcier asks.
    Billy Fisher is my lab partner. We ended up together after everyone else picked lab partners and we were the only two leftwithout one. In other words, we were the biggest losers in the room. The thing is, he’s not the kind of guy you’d think of as a loser. He’s really smart and even kind of cute. I like the way he blushes a little whenever Ms. Forcier asks him a question. I guess he’s shy or something.
    “Uh … reproduction.”
    “Ooooohhhhh,” Tyrone says. “Figures you’d remember that one, B.”
    Most of the class cracks up, and Billy turns even redder.
    “Thank you, Tyrone, that’s enough commentary,” Ms. Forcier says, writing
5. Reproduction
on the board. “Abby, how about giving me another characteristic?”
    I’m trying to visualize the textbook that I read last night, except all I see are Luke’s chats. This is bad. Science is usually my best subject. I stare at the list on the board and will myself to remember what I know is in my brain under all the Lukeness.
    “Um … they adapt to the environment?”
    “That’s right,” Ms. Forcier says, turning to add it to the list on the board.
    I glance over at Billy. He grins at me and I mime wiping my brow with relief.
    “Didn’t you read the chapter?” he asks me after class. “You’re usually the first one to raise your hand with the answer when Ms. Forcier asks a question.”
    “I did. I guess I was having a brain fart or something.”
    He laughs. “Too many beans for dinner last night, huh?”
    “Ha-ha. You’re so funny. Not.”
    But he kind of is. And he’s pretty cute when he smiles.
    “I’ve got to get to math,” I say.
    “Okay, see you around.”
    Nick Peters is waiting to copy my math homework, as usual. It kind of pisses me off that he’s started to expect it. When I said I would help him with math, I didn’t mean I would do it for him. I kind of expected him to put in
some
effort.
    “Thanks, Angie,” he says, handing back my paper. “You rock.”
    Yeah
. I rock so much you can’t even get my fricking name right.
    It drives me crazy how Amanda giggles every time Nick calls me by the wrong name, but she never bothers to correct him. But then, why would she? If they made a movie of our high school, I’d just be “girl in math class” in the credits, where Nick and Mandy would have starring roles.
    Glancing down, I realize I’m doodling Luke’s name again. I guess thinking about him makes the rest of this seem bearable, because to Luke I’m not just social plankton. To Luke, I’m someone special. I hope he’s online when I get home, so I can finally hear what it was he was going to tell me before Mom called me for dinner last night. The suspense is killing me.
    I race to check my computer when I get home, but Luke’s
still
not online. I go down to have a snack and then force myself to focus on my homework. Well, not entirely. I allow myself to check if he’s online every ten minutes, but he’s not there. I wonder where he is and what he’s doing. I realize he’s never really told me all that much about himself.
    “Wut up, loser?”
    Great. Lily’s home.
    “Nothing much, spawn o’ Satan.”
    “We learned about

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