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Lesbian Romance,
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would come to her senses sometime soon, but if she didn’t…
Maybe Callie had the right idea after all. Closure, once and for all, sounded like a good idea.
* * * *
Nicole’s greeted her with a hesitant smile. There was indeed something different about her, subtle things Callie hadn’t noticed in the first shock of seeing her again. The hairstyle and clothes she wore, even her voice. She had worked on softening the edges.
“Callie, I’m so glad. Thank you.”
It was when Callie recalled the content of the text message that she wondered how much of this change simply was façade.
“You’re welcome, but how in the hell do you figure that I owe you?”
Nicole looked chagrined. She was about to answer when the waitress arrived. Callie ordered a latte, Nicole a Diet Coke.
“I changed a lot of habits,” she said with regard to Callie’s surprised look. “I don’t drink anymore, not that much anyway. First of all, I’m so sorry. I didn’t even know if it would all work out, if I got to see you again, and then when I did, it brought up a lot of the old stuff—I just went overboard with that message.”
“I’d say you did. What exactly is it you need from me?”
Callie studied Nicole intently, trying to see the woman she’d once been in love with, and the one she’d fled from, afraid of bodily harm. At the moment, she couldn’t find either.
Nicole started to fold her napkin into a tiny square, averting her eyes for an instant before she spoke.
“After you left, things just went downhill.”
In Callie’s opinion, things had been going downhill for a long time before the incidents leading to that moment. She didn’t want to prolong this conversation, so she just sat and waited.
“I was just so angry all the time, and I didn’t know how to deal with it.”
“I remember.”
“I know. I treated you badly for too long. I can see that now. I’ve had some very intense therapy, and part of the deal was that if possible, I’d go back and apologize, so, here I am. I’m so sorry. I know I hurt you, but I swear I didn’t do it on purpose. I was this messed-up person who couldn’t see beyond herself.”
“Never hurts to broaden one’s horizon.” Callie had an idea of what Nicole wanted her to say. She just wasn’t sure if she could say it, or even wanted to. It didn’t seem fair that a few minutes should bring Nicole absolution when Callie had been trapped for a whole year.
“As far as I’m concerned, you’re free to do whatever you want to. You apologize, fine. I acknowledge it. That’s all I can give you.”
“I’m not asking for more, I promise.”
On the table, Nicole reached for her hand. Callie withdrew it hastily, old habits and all. Maybe she did her wrong, but Nicole’s touch didn’t feel safe. She could barely remember a time when it had.
“You see, I’ve been thinking a lot about what went wrong. We had some good times once.”
There might have been some truth in that, however, those good times had mostly been based on miscommunication and misunderstandings. Callie had been desperate for someone who’d make her feel cherished and protected. Nicole had wanted someone who was easy to control. The bubble had been burst for both of them.
“I’m sorry I never really took your job seriously. I know now that it was wrong. I’d been working all day, having this huge responsibility. When I’d come home, you’d been in the house all day, and you had a headache. I couldn’t understand it. I thought what you did was a hobby.”
“We never really talked about these things.” Callie could acknowledge that much, even though she was uncomfortable giving an inch in this conversation. It wasn’t supposed to be about making up. She didn’t feel obliged to agree to a compromise.
“Mostly, I just yelled at you,” Nicole said ruefully.
Yelling hadn’t always been the issue. Nicole had been able to deliver some very hurtful things without raising her voice.
“You stayed
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