his face. “I don't know. I just... I didn't want to go without you.”
I couldn't help but smile at his words. Now, more than ever, I wished that I was normal. Aiden, he deserved so much better than me.
What am I thinking? He doesn't like me like that. We're just friends. I mean, he hasn't even tried to kiss me or anything. It was obviously he wasn't into me like that.
I suddenly thought about what Grace said... He looks at you like he's dying of thirst and you're a tall glass of water . It couldn't be true. I was sure that all he saw was a sad girl. Maybe that was why he was my friend. He thinks he can fix me. If only he could.
I looked down at my arms. I hadn't written on them since Friday morning and all of the ink had washed off in the shower. Usually I would panic if there wasn't something on them, but not today. I didn't need anything on them. I was shocked.
Maybe having a friend was good for me?
Or, maybe 3 years of therapy had paid off.
Either way, I liked that I was getting better. I was so sick of being that girl ...
I thought back to my life in Chicago. After Steve and Emily adopted me, I kept the name my mom gave me... Emma Bradford... I didn't think it would be an issue. I was going to school in a different part of town. Nobody knew me. I tried to be normal, and even made a couple of friends.
But, then something happened. Somebody at the school found out about my past. They found out about my mom and what she did to me. Then they were all scared of me. They thought crazy might be contagious. That's when I begged Steve and Emily to change my name. Of course I took their last name, Gibson. They were my parents, after all. I let them chose my first name. I didn't care what it was, as long as it wasn't Emma. Because the truth was, I wasn't Emma anymore. They named me Roxy, and I liked it.
To go along with my name change, I also put a strip of pink in my hair. That's when we moved to Alabama. Both Steve and Emily were from here, and I was ecstatic because nobody here knew me. It was like I got to start over. I was homeschooled through my senior year, which was what my therapist suggested.
I started writing on my arms last year, when I started college. As a freshman, I was a little overwhelmed by the amount of people on the college campus... After spending my senior year being homeschooled, it was a big adjustment. A few people had tried to talk to me, which I didn't expect. I even had a few guys ask me out. Me, trying to be normal, went out on a date. I never expected to feel so smothered. I ended up locking myself in the bathroom. I splashed water on my face, but nothing could stop me from panicking. So I got a pen out of my purse and wrote on my arms. I am strong. I will not let the past control me. The more I wrote, the better I felt. And the more I wrote, the more people stayed away from me. I liked it.
It was then that I decided maybe I was crazy. Most people enjoy company. Having friends is normal. Me, wanting to be alone, is not normal.
But what about Aiden? The truth was, I liked being around Aiden. I'd rather be around him than be alone. Does that mean that maybe I'm not crazy?
I shook off the thought. I was destined to be crazy, just like my mom. The sooner I accepted it, the better off everybody would be. I couldn't let Aiden get too close to me.
AIDEN
I was sad to go back to college Sunday night. I enjoyed being at home, and I'm pretty sure Roxy liked it too. Things there felt different, in a good way. And Roxy hadn't written on her arms all weekend. That was awesome.
I looked at Roxy who was sitting in the passenger seat. She looked deep in thought. We had just left Heart, so we still had a 2 hour drive ahead of us.
“What are you thinking” I asked.
She looked over at me, a little shocked. “Um, nothing, really.”
I was so curious about what she was thinking about, and I wondered why she wouldn't tell me. Was she thinking about me? No, probably not. Not once has Roxy acted
I couldn't help but smile at his words. Now, more than ever, I wished that I was normal. Aiden, he deserved so much better than me.
What am I thinking? He doesn't like me like that. We're just friends. I mean, he hasn't even tried to kiss me or anything. It was obviously he wasn't into me like that.
I suddenly thought about what Grace said... He looks at you like he's dying of thirst and you're a tall glass of water . It couldn't be true. I was sure that all he saw was a sad girl. Maybe that was why he was my friend. He thinks he can fix me. If only he could.
I looked down at my arms. I hadn't written on them since Friday morning and all of the ink had washed off in the shower. Usually I would panic if there wasn't something on them, but not today. I didn't need anything on them. I was shocked.
Maybe having a friend was good for me?
Or, maybe 3 years of therapy had paid off.
Either way, I liked that I was getting better. I was so sick of being that girl ...
I thought back to my life in Chicago. After Steve and Emily adopted me, I kept the name my mom gave me... Emma Bradford... I didn't think it would be an issue. I was going to school in a different part of town. Nobody knew me. I tried to be normal, and even made a couple of friends.
But, then something happened. Somebody at the school found out about my past. They found out about my mom and what she did to me. Then they were all scared of me. They thought crazy might be contagious. That's when I begged Steve and Emily to change my name. Of course I took their last name, Gibson. They were my parents, after all. I let them chose my first name. I didn't care what it was, as long as it wasn't Emma. Because the truth was, I wasn't Emma anymore. They named me Roxy, and I liked it.
To go along with my name change, I also put a strip of pink in my hair. That's when we moved to Alabama. Both Steve and Emily were from here, and I was ecstatic because nobody here knew me. It was like I got to start over. I was homeschooled through my senior year, which was what my therapist suggested.
I started writing on my arms last year, when I started college. As a freshman, I was a little overwhelmed by the amount of people on the college campus... After spending my senior year being homeschooled, it was a big adjustment. A few people had tried to talk to me, which I didn't expect. I even had a few guys ask me out. Me, trying to be normal, went out on a date. I never expected to feel so smothered. I ended up locking myself in the bathroom. I splashed water on my face, but nothing could stop me from panicking. So I got a pen out of my purse and wrote on my arms. I am strong. I will not let the past control me. The more I wrote, the better I felt. And the more I wrote, the more people stayed away from me. I liked it.
It was then that I decided maybe I was crazy. Most people enjoy company. Having friends is normal. Me, wanting to be alone, is not normal.
But what about Aiden? The truth was, I liked being around Aiden. I'd rather be around him than be alone. Does that mean that maybe I'm not crazy?
I shook off the thought. I was destined to be crazy, just like my mom. The sooner I accepted it, the better off everybody would be. I couldn't let Aiden get too close to me.
AIDEN
I was sad to go back to college Sunday night. I enjoyed being at home, and I'm pretty sure Roxy liked it too. Things there felt different, in a good way. And Roxy hadn't written on her arms all weekend. That was awesome.
I looked at Roxy who was sitting in the passenger seat. She looked deep in thought. We had just left Heart, so we still had a 2 hour drive ahead of us.
“What are you thinking” I asked.
She looked over at me, a little shocked. “Um, nothing, really.”
I was so curious about what she was thinking about, and I wondered why she wouldn't tell me. Was she thinking about me? No, probably not. Not once has Roxy acted
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