â they never do â but its broken-legged walk causes it to sway from side to side and up and down. Youâve got one shot with your bat. One swing to connect solidly with the skull with enough force to crack it open and smash the brains beneath. If you miss, if the shot glances off the skull, the zombie will wrap you in its arms and bite out your throat. In a matter of minutes, you will be one of them.
ATOMIC ZOMBIES
B EST METHOD OF ELIMINATION: D ESTROY THE BRAIN
The truth is, most people have not developed their hand-eye coordination to a point where they can hit a moving target solidly with any degree of consistency. Sadly, most people badly overestimate their own ability, and this has led to many needless deaths. Even for those trained in combat (or baseball), engaging in hand-to-hand combat against atomic zombies is never recommended. Remember, these creatures usually travel in hordes; even if you take down the first or second zombie, there will likely be more than you can kill. Where hand-to-hand fighting is unavoidable, kill only as many zombies as you need to clear a path and then run. Once you are out of their reach, they will not be able to catch you.
In all cases, atomic zombies should be eliminated from a distance, but even then it can be more difficult than first imagined. Hitting a small moving target with a bullet is incredibly difficult, especially under pressure. Also, only a direct hit will penetrate the skull, as evolution specifically designed it to deflect blows. Still, a solid shot through an eye or smack in the forehead will take down any atomic zombie. The effect is virtually instantaneous, almost like flipping an off switch. The zombie immediately ceases all forward movement and collapses.
Because of the atomic zombieâs weakness, it is particularly easy to prevent, even if the prevention is just as distasteful as the cure. A corpse with a destroyed (or removed) brain will not reanimate due to chemical conditions. While most morticians are aware of the zombie threat, few will apply this simple preventive measure unless it is specifically requested. Where the next of kin does request zombie-proofing, or more commonly if it is stated in the will of the deceased, the mortician will drive a long, thin nail called a skull pick through the crown of the skull down into the brain. It is quick, mostly clean, and completely painless (assuming the recipient is actually dead).
For those afraid of having nails in their head after they die, there is always cremation, which prevents all forms of zombie reanimation. If neither of these options is acceptable, bodies can be buried in a metal coffin. While this will not prevent reanimation, when combined with six feet of earth, it will prevent even the most determined atomic zombie from breaking out, leaving the unfortunate corpse to slowly consume itself.
Â
12 Contrary to popular mythology, zombies do not need to eat brains. This seems to be a confusion of the idea that an atomic zombie needs its own brain to function. Zombies will certainly eat brains, but show no preference for them.
13 Thanks to Prof R. Sullivanâs âPorcine Feed Experiments,â blood has been ruled out as a zombie attractor.
Viral Zombies
As early as the mid-1960s, a few within the animate necrology community described the zombie threat as a virus. With necromantic, revenant, and atomic zombies, the undead seemed to continuously evolve, offering new threats just as humanity came to grips with the old ones. Then, sometime in the early 1970s, the metaphor became a reality. Like most viruses, it is impossible to trace the zombie virus back to its origin, that point where an essentially benign biological agent mutated into one of the greatest dangers of the twenty-first century.
Most necrovirologists agree that the first strands of the virus developed in China. However, because of Chinaâs strict media control, doubts remain as to the exact time and location
ATOMIC ZOMBIES
B EST METHOD OF ELIMINATION: D ESTROY THE BRAIN
The truth is, most people have not developed their hand-eye coordination to a point where they can hit a moving target solidly with any degree of consistency. Sadly, most people badly overestimate their own ability, and this has led to many needless deaths. Even for those trained in combat (or baseball), engaging in hand-to-hand combat against atomic zombies is never recommended. Remember, these creatures usually travel in hordes; even if you take down the first or second zombie, there will likely be more than you can kill. Where hand-to-hand fighting is unavoidable, kill only as many zombies as you need to clear a path and then run. Once you are out of their reach, they will not be able to catch you.
In all cases, atomic zombies should be eliminated from a distance, but even then it can be more difficult than first imagined. Hitting a small moving target with a bullet is incredibly difficult, especially under pressure. Also, only a direct hit will penetrate the skull, as evolution specifically designed it to deflect blows. Still, a solid shot through an eye or smack in the forehead will take down any atomic zombie. The effect is virtually instantaneous, almost like flipping an off switch. The zombie immediately ceases all forward movement and collapses.
Because of the atomic zombieâs weakness, it is particularly easy to prevent, even if the prevention is just as distasteful as the cure. A corpse with a destroyed (or removed) brain will not reanimate due to chemical conditions. While most morticians are aware of the zombie threat, few will apply this simple preventive measure unless it is specifically requested. Where the next of kin does request zombie-proofing, or more commonly if it is stated in the will of the deceased, the mortician will drive a long, thin nail called a skull pick through the crown of the skull down into the brain. It is quick, mostly clean, and completely painless (assuming the recipient is actually dead).
For those afraid of having nails in their head after they die, there is always cremation, which prevents all forms of zombie reanimation. If neither of these options is acceptable, bodies can be buried in a metal coffin. While this will not prevent reanimation, when combined with six feet of earth, it will prevent even the most determined atomic zombie from breaking out, leaving the unfortunate corpse to slowly consume itself.
Â
12 Contrary to popular mythology, zombies do not need to eat brains. This seems to be a confusion of the idea that an atomic zombie needs its own brain to function. Zombies will certainly eat brains, but show no preference for them.
13 Thanks to Prof R. Sullivanâs âPorcine Feed Experiments,â blood has been ruled out as a zombie attractor.
Viral Zombies
As early as the mid-1960s, a few within the animate necrology community described the zombie threat as a virus. With necromantic, revenant, and atomic zombies, the undead seemed to continuously evolve, offering new threats just as humanity came to grips with the old ones. Then, sometime in the early 1970s, the metaphor became a reality. Like most viruses, it is impossible to trace the zombie virus back to its origin, that point where an essentially benign biological agent mutated into one of the greatest dangers of the twenty-first century.
Most necrovirologists agree that the first strands of the virus developed in China. However, because of Chinaâs strict media control, doubts remain as to the exact time and location
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