Dastardly Deeds by Ilsa Evans

‘What’s wrong?’
    ‘Nothing.’
    ‘Is it something Dad did?’
    I smiled reassuringly and shook my head. I was touched by her concern, and her intuition, but this did not involve her.
    We followed Ali around the corner onto a paved walkway that was flanked by the crumbled walls of Troy. He immediately launched into a practised spiel, although much of it seemed to be about construction rather than mythology. I paused to read the signs that were planted along the walkway, giving context to the roughly two thousand years of history that surrounded us.
    ‘You’ve got to loosen up,’ said Petra, falling into step beside me. ‘I mean, what she said was daft, but you’ve got to stop taking everything personally.’
    ‘Easy for you to say.’
    Petra frowned at me. ‘And you’ve also got to stop acting like you’re the only person who’s ever been cheated on. I’ve been cheated on, and I’ve also been the cheater. So actually I’ve got more experience than you.’
    ‘Who did you cheat on? When?’
    She shrugged. ‘Doesn’t matter. The point is that cheating might be selfish and mean-spirited, but it’s also a pretty clear indication that the relationship isn’t working – even if one person isn’t quite aware of that yet.’
    I stopped. ‘Are you saying I was stupid?’
    ‘What? No! How the hell did you get that?’
    ‘You’re saying I should have known. That I wasn’t paying attention.’
    She closed her eyes for a moment. ‘
God
, you’re infuriating sometimes!’
    ‘Are you two arguing?’ Yen had dropped back from the main group. ‘If so, stop it. You’re lagging behind. What are you arguing about?’
    ‘Nothing,’ said Petra. She strode off, joining up with Deb at the rear.
    Yen turned her attention to me. ‘What were you arguing about?’
    ‘Oh, just long-term plans for you. Like who inherits you when you’re incompetent. Things like that.’
    She raised an eyebrow. ‘No need to fight then. You’re the winner. I’m moving into that spare room at the top of your stairs.’
    ‘
What?
’
    ‘Got you, hey?’ Her eyes gleamed. ‘Don’t play games with an expert, missy.’
    I could feel my heart start up again. It felt unsteady.
Elderly woman gives daughter cardiac arrest. It was only a matter of time, say relatives grimly.
    ‘Now, I need to ask you a favour. Enid’s driving me batty. I want you to take her to dinner tonight so that Jim and I can have some time to ourselves.’
    I frowned. ‘Is this another joke?’
    ‘Certainly not. We’re going to see a show. Come on, we’re being left behind.’
    I followed her towards the main group, a little stunned. I barely knew Enid Hurley, having only met her a few times before this trip. Even apart from her opinions on infidelity, she wasn’t exactly cruise-ship dinner companion material. Perhaps I could palm her off on to Petra as payback. I came up behind Ruby, who was taking photos with her new camera. This reminded me that I still hadn’t spoken to her about what was going on. Perhaps my proximity also reminded her, because she immediately sidled away with her camera raised, as if wanting to get a better angle. It was rather smoothly done.
    ‘I didn’t mean to put my foot in it before,’ said Donald, beside me.
    ‘Not at all. It was just Enid, hitting a raw spot.’
    ‘Yeah, seems to be a bit—’ He broke off, staring at my hat pensively. His eyes widened. ‘I’ve got it. You’re the woman from the Colosseum.’
    I flushed. ‘Yes. Sorry about that. I was embarrassed to be caught eavesdropping.’
    ‘I
knew
I’d seen you before.’ He looked more pleased than annoyed. ‘I never forget a face. You speak French.’
    ‘Ah, not so much. Sorry.’
    ‘Don’t worry about it.’ He waved a hand dismissively, and then paused. ‘So Deb tells me Darcy is your ex? That must be awkward.’
    ‘A little.’
    He pushed his glasses back, gazing towards Ali, who was now holding forth on sediment. ‘Hmm. You didn’t have a current