Make Every Man Want You: How to Be So Irresistible You'll Barely Keep From Dating Yourself! by Marie Forleo

with thought and attention. Get the nice towels. This is it.
Get dressed, put on makeup, and style your hair like it counts. Take your time and pay attention to the details. This is it.
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    Here's the best part: by practicing "this is it," you'll start to notice dramatic, astonishing shifts in every other area of your life as well. Without trying to make it better, you'll find work more effortless and fun because you won't be wishing you were somewhere else. Your house will look and feel more like a home because you'll be more invested in living there. You'll find yourself less stressed and anxious throughout your day—making you much more alive and energetic.
    Practicing "this is it" will also have a powerful impact on your appearance, net worth, and relationships with friends and family. Not bad for one little concept, eh?
TRUTH 4
Men Are As-Is Merchandise, or Love 'Em or Leave 'Em, Baby!
     
     
If the shoe doesn't fit, must we change the foot?
    —
Gloria Steinem
    Have you ever found yourself dating a man and thinking, "He'd be perfect if only he were more affectionate, less controlling, more communicative, less self-absorbed, younger, older, wealthier, more A, less B . . . ?" Chances are, if you've ever dated anyone, you have had these thoughts. Fix-him thinking is rampant in our society and plays a big part in many unhappy relationships. It may also be a mind-set that's keeping you single.
    Psst. Here's another secret: men don't want to be changed or improved.
    Think about it. Would you feel attracted to a man who constantly tried to change or improve you? Someone who told you to lose a little weight? Wanted you to do a little less talking and more cooking and cleaning? Didn't think so. You've got to give up trying to make him be different than he is if you want to be irresistible. In fact, much of your"wishing he'd be different" keeps him staying exactly the same. (Remember, what we resist persists.)
    I've got another question for you. Have you ever been to the "as-is" department at IKEA? It's a big room filled with furniture; small chairs, big tables, couches, entertainment centers, lamps, and assorted pillows fill the space. Some pieces are like new, while others have some wear and tear and require a bit of TLC. All of it is for sale in the condition that you find it, for the price marked.
    When you visit the "as-is" department, you look at what's available and choose whether or not you want it. Of course, you can waste time talking to yourself about how you wish something were different . . .
"If that chair were yellow, it would be perfect."
"If that couch were just a little wider, it would work for me."
"If that table were a shade darker, it would be ideal for my kitchen."
    . . . but ultimately you must look at what is and see whether or not it would be a good fit for you right now. If it works, you take it. If not, you move on. Well, guess what? Men are no different. One of the biggest mistakes women make is trying to change or improve a man into something he's not. This includes trying to change the way he feels toward you. Let's repeat this all together, shall we? You cannot change the way a man feels or behaves.
    Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that men don't change or can't change. People transform their lives all the time.
However
, it is not your job to change or improve anyone—especially your partner. If he wants to change or adjust anything, he needs to choose that on his own.
    It's like this. Every human being is a unique and perfect expression of who he or she is in this moment. People can be different than they are right now (this includes you). As an irresistible woman, your job is to simply be here and tell the truth about what works for you and what doesn't. Make is-ness your business and meet life as it shows up—not as you prefer it to show up.
    If you don't like something about the man you're dating, you have two choices: (1) communicate in a straightforward yet compassionate way about