Three Thousand Miles by Deila Longford

chose to betray me. I t is not my fault that things have gone this way . ”
    “Y ou can’t just walk away . ”
    “W atch me,” she says as she opens the door and a second later, she is gone. I thro w myself down into the bed and cover my head with the sheet. My life is ruined, I have no Adrian, no Michael and now Katharine is gone. My heart has collapsed at the thought of this. How I could have lost so many people , that are important to me , is mind numbing and I am plagued by the thoughts of not having them in my life. I think of the words I heard from Adrian, he thinks I am better off without him, I cannot see how that could be possible. If anything I am worse without him, I need him to realise that, I possibly could if he would just talk to me. Ha ve Katharine’s words affected how he feels? Is th ere a slight chance now that he knows a bout Michael and Katharine being back together, could that bring back him to me? My mind spins and I feel a migraine coming on. I push the sheet from my face and sit fully up in the bed. I reach over to the sliding table and pull it towards me. I take two headache pills from the bottle that sits on the table. I sip a small glass of water as I swallow the pills. I reach out and lift up my white Blackberry, I scroll t hrough my texts and emails, however , ther e are none from Adrian. I take a deep breath and compose a text to him,
    Adrian, this cannot go on any longer, I am going crazy without you. I wish that you would see sense and call me, I miss you and I need you, please Adrian I am begging you - just one text is all that I am asking for.
    I hit send and I do not get my hopes up for a reply. I look to see what time it is and I notice that its gone three. Knowing that my mom will be here soon, I get out of bed and head into the bathroom. I walk over slow ly and painfully, although the pain is not quarter as bad , as it was before , but it does still hurt. I find the pain gets worse , the longer I stay in be d. I wish that I were home and now I just want things to back to - some kind of - normal. I know that , before I can leave this hospital , I have to show everyone that I am fine. I open the bathroom door and flick on the light. I catch my reflection in the mirror and I am appalled at what I see. My hair is thick mass of tangles, my face is even paler t han before and my eyes seem as if they have s u nk into my head. My lips are still full colour but they are dry and chapped and in desperate need of some lip balm.  There is no way I would ever let my mom see me like this. She would definitely know that I was crying from the stains on my cheeks. I do not want her to think that I am unstable, I want out of this hospital and I need to give everyone the illusion that I am perfectly happy. I take out my hairbrush from the wash bag and start to run it through my tangled hair. I manage to ease the frizz and slick it back into a high top bun. I splash my face with cold water and apply some face wash. I scrub at my face until its gleaming; I rub in some glowing moisturiser and apply strawberry lip balm to my large red lips. I lean back and take long look at myself. When I feel that I look somewhat presentable, I switch off the light and make my way back over to the bed. I get half away across the room when I hear a knock at the door.
    “Alanna , ” I hear Dr James say. I turn around and he is standing in the doorway. I smile at him.
    “Yes, how I may help you?” H e smiles and pushes the door further open.
    “I just came to check on you, but you look fine, how are you feeling today?” I remember the thoughts I just had about the illusion of happiness.
    “I am great,” I say beaming.
    “You certainly look great,” he says very cheekily. He rushes up to me and escorts me back to the bed.
    “You know, I can manage by self, the pain is not so bad now and I do feel great.” I slip into the bed and pull the sheet over me; Dr James s tands very smugly.
    “Alanna, I know that you