52 Cups of Coffee: Inspiring and insightful stories for navigating life’s uncertainties by Megan Gebhart Page A
Authors: Megan Gebhart
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helping others. With the business running strong, Denise stepped away from daily operations at the pie shop to contribute her efforts to a group of people working to bring a Children’s Advocacy Center to Traverse City.
Her journey has had its fair share of ups and down, but she is flourishing because she looks for the positive and focuses on doing her best in difficult situations. She approaches life with that same mentality she had when she decided, “I’m going to be the sales rep of the year,” instead of believing “this situation is unfair, and I’ll never make it.”
* * *
A few days after meeting with Denise, I was having a bad day; there was something I just couldn’t get off my mind. I spent all day dwelling on the bad situation, and by the end of the day, the negative thoughts had caught up to me.
Then I remembered what Denise had said: “Why label something as good or bad? Why can ’t we just accept the situation for what it is?”
That ’s when Denise’s words about acceptance sunk in. We often get stuck wallowing in situations we can’t control: the weather, genetics, the economy, the past, a bad sales territory—whatever it might be. And we let these situations drag us down. We focus on why it’s unfair, or we wish with all our might that we can snap our fingers and solve the problem. Why do we do this?
We do it because acceptance is so damn hard. No one wants to face the reality that life has imperfections. So we default to denial. We either dwell on the problem or push it under the rug and pretend it’s not there. But that doesn’t work. Refusing to accept situations we cannot change leads to wasting significant emotional and mental energy trying to change a situation over which we have no control. We end up entrenching our thoughts in a negative cycle that starts off ineffective and becomes increasingly destructive.
But , if we can find the strength to push through the emotion and pain necessary to accept reality, we can redirect our focus toward identifying the issues we can control. We start looking for solutions instead of wallowing in problems.
The process of acceptance has transformative effects. It is the reason Denise became sales rep of the year, and one of the reasons she and Mike have succeeded in both the restaurant business and in their mission to support their community.
As I sat there in my bad mood, feeling the weight of the world on top of me, I thought about Denise and how one sales meeting had changed her life. I realized then that when life is pushing down on me, I am just wasting energy trying to push back. As hard as it is to let go, the more efficient use of energy is finding a way to move forward.
Ruben Derderian
Michigan State University Technologies Office
Brewed coffee
The job you get is important, but it ’s what you do once you get there that truly matters.
Have you ever jumped off a high dive? You start on the ground and inch your way up the ladder, each rung getting you closer to the impending moment when you must leave the safety of the board for the uncertainty of the air and the cool blue water below. You’ve been waiting for this moment, preparing for it, in some ways looking forward to it, but all the mental preparedness can’t mitigate the anticipation of the fall, and the unexpected outcome the water brings.
It ’s nerve-racking.
That’s what it can feel like figuring out what to do after college—jumping off the diving board into the waters of real life.
Rung one: Write a resume.
Rung two: Job fair.
Rung three: Interview.
Rung four: Acceptance letter.
When you reach the top of the ladder, you inch your way closer to the edge, knowing full well there’s no turning back. It’s only a matter of time before commencement rolls around and you’re on the edge of the board. Until then, the fear, excitement, and uncertainty mount.
Senior year is fun, but man, can it be stressful. Fortunately, as Ruben Derderian told me, the
Her journey has had its fair share of ups and down, but she is flourishing because she looks for the positive and focuses on doing her best in difficult situations. She approaches life with that same mentality she had when she decided, “I’m going to be the sales rep of the year,” instead of believing “this situation is unfair, and I’ll never make it.”
* * *
A few days after meeting with Denise, I was having a bad day; there was something I just couldn’t get off my mind. I spent all day dwelling on the bad situation, and by the end of the day, the negative thoughts had caught up to me.
Then I remembered what Denise had said: “Why label something as good or bad? Why can ’t we just accept the situation for what it is?”
That ’s when Denise’s words about acceptance sunk in. We often get stuck wallowing in situations we can’t control: the weather, genetics, the economy, the past, a bad sales territory—whatever it might be. And we let these situations drag us down. We focus on why it’s unfair, or we wish with all our might that we can snap our fingers and solve the problem. Why do we do this?
We do it because acceptance is so damn hard. No one wants to face the reality that life has imperfections. So we default to denial. We either dwell on the problem or push it under the rug and pretend it’s not there. But that doesn’t work. Refusing to accept situations we cannot change leads to wasting significant emotional and mental energy trying to change a situation over which we have no control. We end up entrenching our thoughts in a negative cycle that starts off ineffective and becomes increasingly destructive.
But , if we can find the strength to push through the emotion and pain necessary to accept reality, we can redirect our focus toward identifying the issues we can control. We start looking for solutions instead of wallowing in problems.
The process of acceptance has transformative effects. It is the reason Denise became sales rep of the year, and one of the reasons she and Mike have succeeded in both the restaurant business and in their mission to support their community.
As I sat there in my bad mood, feeling the weight of the world on top of me, I thought about Denise and how one sales meeting had changed her life. I realized then that when life is pushing down on me, I am just wasting energy trying to push back. As hard as it is to let go, the more efficient use of energy is finding a way to move forward.
Ruben Derderian
Michigan State University Technologies Office
Brewed coffee
The job you get is important, but it ’s what you do once you get there that truly matters.
Have you ever jumped off a high dive? You start on the ground and inch your way up the ladder, each rung getting you closer to the impending moment when you must leave the safety of the board for the uncertainty of the air and the cool blue water below. You’ve been waiting for this moment, preparing for it, in some ways looking forward to it, but all the mental preparedness can’t mitigate the anticipation of the fall, and the unexpected outcome the water brings.
It ’s nerve-racking.
That’s what it can feel like figuring out what to do after college—jumping off the diving board into the waters of real life.
Rung one: Write a resume.
Rung two: Job fair.
Rung three: Interview.
Rung four: Acceptance letter.
When you reach the top of the ladder, you inch your way closer to the edge, knowing full well there’s no turning back. It’s only a matter of time before commencement rolls around and you’re on the edge of the board. Until then, the fear, excitement, and uncertainty mount.
Senior year is fun, but man, can it be stressful. Fortunately, as Ruben Derderian told me, the
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