A Little Learning by Jane Tesh

be smoking while wearing a nicotine patch?”
    “I have no idea.” He lowered his voice. “I have no objections to you investigating this, but I answer to the school board. They’d have to give permission, and we’d have to officially hire you. This may take some time.”
    “I understand,” I said. “Unofficially, I may be able to gather some information today.”
    “I know where you can start,” Rachel said. “The teachers’ lounge.”
    I thought the Internet was fast, but the teachers’ lounge was already buzzing with the news of Amelia’s Last Cigarette. Rachel introduced me to everyone at the table. Josh Kellogg, a tall, untidy fifth grade teacher, had a shirt and tie barely containing his belly. DeAnne Rivers, a third grade teacher, was a small intense woman with short unnaturally red hair. Brenda Mullins, the school nurse, had fluffy blonde hair and a slightly dull expression. I wondered why she hadn’t been called to the loading dock and asked her that very question.
    “Oh, I just got here,” she said. “I work at the high school, too. I missed all the excitement.”
    Other teachers and assistants rushed in and out, having just enough time to say hello, grab a drink out of the machine and their lunch out of the fridge.
    “So you’re the one who caught that librarian who killed the movie director,” Josh said. “You think someone killed Amelia?”
    “I don’t know,” I said. “She may have overdosed on nicotine.”
    “Can you believe it?” Brenda Mullins said. “I can’t wait to tell Joey.”
    DeAnne Rivers unwrapped her sandwich. “You should’ve seen the Doormat’s face. I thought she was going to faint.”
    “She probably did it,” Josh Kellogg said. “You gotta watch the quiet ones.”
    I turned to Rachel. “Doormat?”
    “That’s our rather unkind nickname for Mrs. Dorman.”
    “Because she really is a doormat to Amelia Lever—or at least she was,” DeAnne said. “Josh, you’re just lucky you weren’t at the scene of the crime.”
    “DeAnne, just because the old bag’s dead doesn’t change how I feel about her. She was one of the meanest bitches I’ve ever had the misfortune to work with.”
    She took a bite of sandwich. “It does get you back on the planning committee.”
    “Hey, I’d forgotten about that. Now that Lever’s dead, I move up.”
    “Uh-oh, I smell a motive. Are you taking notes, Ms. Maclin?”
    Josh reached for one of the packs of sugar on the table, opened it, and shook the contents into his coffee. “She only took the committee position because she knew I wanted it.”
    “And where were you when she keeled over?” DeAnne asked.
    “Taking my class to P.E. Where were you?”
    “Getting stickers and gum off the computer keyboard.” She turned to Rachel. “Who was at the scene of the crime, Rachel?”
    “Who’s calling it a crime? She never should have been smoking. I went out to speak to Jacey, so it was the two of us.”
    Josh slurped the last of his coffee. “Rachel could’ve iced her, couldn’t you, Rachel? Amelia’s the main reason the arts program didn’t get that grant.”
    “That’s not something I’d kill for, Josh.”
    “I would. The old bat purposely voted against using PTA money for new P.E. equipment, too. She was an equal opportunity miser.”
    DeAnne had finished her sandwich. She crumpled the wrapping and tossed it in the trashcan. “Let’s face it, people. Everyone in this school hated her and isn’t sorry she’s dead. You’ve got plenty of suspects, Ms. Maclin. Besides, who says it’s murder? She had a heart attack. Maybe we just wish it had been murder.”
    Josh shrugged. “Who cares? I’m sure the Doormat’s going to be broken up about it. Probably danced all the way down the hall.”
    “I doubt that,” Brenda said. “She’s too old.”
    Kellogg and Rivers exchanged a glance that spoke volumes about their opinion of Brenda Mullins.
    “I mean she’s glad Lever’s dead, Brenda,” Josh said.
    Brenda