Access Denied (and other eighth grade error messages) by Denise Vega

on mascara.
     “And you really pissed off some people.”
    So Serena had told her about the YOHE. I waited for my big reaction. Anger. Embarrassment. Fear. But nothing came.
    “It was last winter,” I said. “I don’t know why Serena still cares. I don’t.” “She was kidding about it,” Reede said, then
     cocked her head. “Did you really wear a sandwich board? Man, you’ve got
guts,
girl.”
    I smiled. “Guts or stupidity, we’re still not sure.”
    Reede smiled and turned to check her face and hair one more time before moving aside so I could get my books. “And I’m glad
     I’m not the only one who kissed her pillow before kissing the real thing.”
    My eyes bugged out.
“You?”
    Reede laughed. “Yes, me.”
    I couldn’t believe it. Sophisticated Reede Harper kissing her pillow? Let’s put
that
out on the MBMS website.
    She pulled out her black bag and her other makeup case slipped out and hit the floor, spilling a lipstick and two cigarettes.
    My heart stuttered. Having cigarettes was a huge rule breaker. And smoking them on school grounds could get you suspended.
     I felt my breath come faster, as if I was the one who had the cigarettes.
    “Whoops,” Reede said, snatching them up. “Wouldn’t want anyone seeing those babies.” She zipped the bag halfway, then stopped.
     “Want one?”
    Huh? Did I look like I smoked? “No, thanks.”
    She shrugged. “See you tomorrow.”
    I watched her go, my mind racing. Reede Harper smoked. Reede Harper kissed her pillow. Reede Harper didn’t think I was a dork,
     even though she now knew about my blog—knew I had called Mark a Hot Tamale and that I was a corn cob in the Thanksgiving play
     last year.
    Huh.
    Taking a deep breath, I turned and looked at myself in her mirror.
Did
I look like someone who smoked? I put my pencil between my fingers and held it near my mouth.
    “What are you doing?”
    Mark’s voice startled me and I dropped the pencil.
    “I didn’t know you stayed after school today,” I said, picking up the pencil.
    “I had to talk to my algebra teacher.” He wrinkled his brow. “It looked like you were pretending to smoke.”
    I snorted, hoping it sounded more convincing to him than it did to me. “Yeah, right. I was pretending to smoke.”
    “Well, you have been known to kiss your pillow.”
    “Shut up.” I smacked him. “Why are you so annoying?”
    Mark laughed and made a face, just as a set of arms wrapped around his waist from behind.
    “I’ve been looking for you,” Kara said. She leaned around him, frowning before forcing herself to smile. “Hey, Erin.”
    “Hey, Kara.” I pulled the rest of my books out of my locker and shut the door. “Gotta go or I’ll miss the bus.”
    “See ya,” Mark called. I lifted my hand in a wave but didn’t look back. No doubt they were lip-locked together, no pillows
     necessary. But hey, maybe that would be me with Blake Thornton, ninth grade cutie. I smiled. It was weird how a part of me
     was terrified to kiss him and part of me really wanted to.
    The thought made me tingle all over.
    Wednesday, September 10
    MORE THINGS WE KNOW ABOUT REEDE HARPER
    She smokes.
    She doesn’t deny she smokes.
    She didn’t dis me abt the YOHE.
    HOT——METER
    #1 Blake Thornton —totally gorgeous 9th grade mountain surfer
    #2 Dylan Beaumont —taken, but cute
    #3 Mark Sacks —the hair, the butt in shorts—need I say more?
    #4 Mr. Perkins (drops to #4 because of age gap)
    MORE THINGS WE KNOW ABOUT ERIN SWIFT
    She doesn’t smoke.
    She would never smoke on or off campus not only cuz it’s gross but cuz she’s a rule follower.
    She is just going 2 wing the kissing thing—a pillow isn’t even close anyway.
    THINGS THAT MAKE ME WONDER
    What would it feel like 2 break a rule? Maybe not a big 1 that got me expelled or anything, but a little 1, outside of school,
     just 2 test it out… test ME out.
    What would it feel like not 2 be 2 chicken 2 find out? Bawk.
    Will I get 2 kiss Blake on Fri? I