that.” My head snaps around as I glare at Todd.
“Whoa there, honey.” He throws his hands up in innocence. “I was
just saying hi.”
I open my mouth to blast him for calling me honey when Jacob gives
my hand a tug. “I’m hungry, come help me make a plate.”
“Dude,” I hear Robby say. “He just totally saved your ass. You know
she hates you. Why do you push your luck?”
My hand stays wrapped tightly in Jacob’s as we move across the yard
over to the grill and the small table set up next to it. He lets go just long
enough to make a plate. I wait quietly, knowing he’s got a million and one
questions, and I don’t have a single answer for what I’d just done.
Holden and Grant are standing at the grill, which really isn’t all
that far away from us. Holden has a puzzled look on his face where Grant just
looks pissed. When Jacob’s plate is fixed, he balances it in one hand and grabs
my hand in the other.
“Somewhere quiet?”
I nod my head, leading him back through the house and out on to the
front steps. I drop his hand the moment the front door closes behind us,
rubbing the palm of my hand against my jeans as if that will somehow wipe away
the stupid decision I’d just made.
“I’m so sorry, Jacob.” I sit on the top step, dropping my head into
my hands, I thread my fingers through my hair, pulling slightly. “I don’t know
what in the hell came over me.”
He takes a bite of his burger, chewing slowly as he watches me.
It’s unnerving, waiting for him to say something. To say anything. I can’t read
a freaking thing on his poker face, and those unique frost blue eyes don’t
indicate one way or the other what’s going on behind them.
Finally he swallows. “Did we start dating and I missed it? Because
I’m pretty sure that’s not something I would forget,” he says, then calmly
takes another bite of burger. Like this is a normal every day conversation.
I mean, I know I talk about my fake relationship all the freaking time.
Doesn’t everyone?
“He pissed me off. Again.”
One brown brow arches up. “Which one?”
“Grant mostly.” I reach over and grab a Cheeto off his plate,
popping it in my mouth before he can take it back. “Holden doesn’t make me mad
so much as he makes my heart hurt.”
Jacob makes a noise under his breath that I can’t quite pin down. I
know he thinks Holden should be mad at Grant for dumping me, just as I know
that I won’t hold it against Holden that he isn’t. The friendship between Grant
and Holden is hard to explain to someone who didn’t watch it form. Grant had a
lackluster mother and a mostly absentee father, and when he was home it wasn’t
all sunshine and roses in the Michaels’ house.
So Grant spent more time at our house than his own, and then their junior
year of high school something happened and Holden had brought Grant home with
two broken ribs, a split lip, a broken nose, and matching black eyes. Grant’s
father disappeared entirely after that, and my father had a come to Jesus
meeting with his mother.
She’d never win mother of the year, but things had improved for
Grant at home after that. In one of the rare times that Grant had opened up to
me about his home life he told me that Holden had saved his life. He hadn’t
gone in to it more than that, and I hadn’t pushed.
Maybe I should have. Maybe knowing more would help me understand
where he was coming from now.
“So Grant pissed you off and you thought it would be a good idea to
what? Make him jealous?”
“Uh, jealous wouldn’t be the word I’d use.” I wrinkle my nose in
thought. “Though it might be a tiny part of my reason.” I allow. “A very tiny
part.”
“Okay.” He swallows another bite. “So now what?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t think that far ahead. I’m a spur of the
moment kind of girl, Jacob. Planning is for pussies.”
He chokes on a bite of burger and I laugh. “Yeah,” I say with a
shake of my head. “Sorry.”
“It’s just
“Whoa there, honey.” He throws his hands up in innocence. “I was
just saying hi.”
I open my mouth to blast him for calling me honey when Jacob gives
my hand a tug. “I’m hungry, come help me make a plate.”
“Dude,” I hear Robby say. “He just totally saved your ass. You know
she hates you. Why do you push your luck?”
My hand stays wrapped tightly in Jacob’s as we move across the yard
over to the grill and the small table set up next to it. He lets go just long
enough to make a plate. I wait quietly, knowing he’s got a million and one
questions, and I don’t have a single answer for what I’d just done.
Holden and Grant are standing at the grill, which really isn’t all
that far away from us. Holden has a puzzled look on his face where Grant just
looks pissed. When Jacob’s plate is fixed, he balances it in one hand and grabs
my hand in the other.
“Somewhere quiet?”
I nod my head, leading him back through the house and out on to the
front steps. I drop his hand the moment the front door closes behind us,
rubbing the palm of my hand against my jeans as if that will somehow wipe away
the stupid decision I’d just made.
“I’m so sorry, Jacob.” I sit on the top step, dropping my head into
my hands, I thread my fingers through my hair, pulling slightly. “I don’t know
what in the hell came over me.”
He takes a bite of his burger, chewing slowly as he watches me.
It’s unnerving, waiting for him to say something. To say anything. I can’t read
a freaking thing on his poker face, and those unique frost blue eyes don’t
indicate one way or the other what’s going on behind them.
Finally he swallows. “Did we start dating and I missed it? Because
I’m pretty sure that’s not something I would forget,” he says, then calmly
takes another bite of burger. Like this is a normal every day conversation.
I mean, I know I talk about my fake relationship all the freaking time.
Doesn’t everyone?
“He pissed me off. Again.”
One brown brow arches up. “Which one?”
“Grant mostly.” I reach over and grab a Cheeto off his plate,
popping it in my mouth before he can take it back. “Holden doesn’t make me mad
so much as he makes my heart hurt.”
Jacob makes a noise under his breath that I can’t quite pin down. I
know he thinks Holden should be mad at Grant for dumping me, just as I know
that I won’t hold it against Holden that he isn’t. The friendship between Grant
and Holden is hard to explain to someone who didn’t watch it form. Grant had a
lackluster mother and a mostly absentee father, and when he was home it wasn’t
all sunshine and roses in the Michaels’ house.
So Grant spent more time at our house than his own, and then their junior
year of high school something happened and Holden had brought Grant home with
two broken ribs, a split lip, a broken nose, and matching black eyes. Grant’s
father disappeared entirely after that, and my father had a come to Jesus
meeting with his mother.
She’d never win mother of the year, but things had improved for
Grant at home after that. In one of the rare times that Grant had opened up to
me about his home life he told me that Holden had saved his life. He hadn’t
gone in to it more than that, and I hadn’t pushed.
Maybe I should have. Maybe knowing more would help me understand
where he was coming from now.
“So Grant pissed you off and you thought it would be a good idea to
what? Make him jealous?”
“Uh, jealous wouldn’t be the word I’d use.” I wrinkle my nose in
thought. “Though it might be a tiny part of my reason.” I allow. “A very tiny
part.”
“Okay.” He swallows another bite. “So now what?”
“I don’t know. I didn’t think that far ahead. I’m a spur of the
moment kind of girl, Jacob. Planning is for pussies.”
He chokes on a bite of burger and I laugh. “Yeah,” I say with a
shake of my head. “Sorry.”
“It’s just
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