deep breaths, seeming unable to speak. Katie’s insides were knotted tight. She was filled with a sense of utter dread.
‘Why were they here?’ she whispered.
Her mother suddenly put her hands over her face. ‘Oh my Lord. Oh God in heaven!’ She began to shake.
After a moment she yanked her hands down to her lap, forcing them to be still and swallowing hard, determined not to give way to her emotion. The words jolted out of her.
‘Prepare yourself for a shock. It’s your uncle. They . . . I was at work . . . He . . . The police came . . . He’s been found – in the canal. Last night, when he didn’t come home – well, it was one of those nights. There’ve been so many, when he just goes off, walks himself into exhaustion.’ She stared in a haunted way towards the window. ‘I didn’t think . . . He wasn’t – I mean, so many times, when he’s been—’
Abruptly she sat up, gathering herself and turning to Katie, her eyes full of a terrible intensity. She put her hands on Katie’s shoulders, gripping painfully hard.
‘It was an accident, that’s what it was. A tragic accident that no one could have prevented. D’you understand, Katie? No one else knows how he went about at night, and no one needs to. We don’t know anything, except that he set out full of life, and now he’s gone.’
Katie burst into tears. ‘What d’you mean, he’s gone? Did he jump in the canal?’
‘No!’ her mother cried furiously, shaking her.
‘Ow! Mom! Don’t – you’re hurting.’
‘Don’t you ever say that. Don’t you even think it, d’you hear? It was an accident. That’s all.’
Katie was sobbing. ‘Is Uncle Patrick dead? Isn’t he coming back?’
Her mother stopped shaking her and let go, as if she had gone limp.
‘No,’ she said bleakly. ‘He’s not coming back.’
The coffin was moved into the house the next day, while Katie was at school.
‘What happened?’ Amy said as soon as she got there. ‘Why was there a policeman at your house?’
‘It’s my uncle,’ Katie said, her eyes filling with tears. ‘He’s died in an accident.’ All day she was close to tears.
‘I think you’d better come in and pay your respects,’ Vera said when Katie came home. She seemed to be holding herself in very tight. ‘Come along now – let’s get it over with.’
It was strange and terrible seeing the coffin taking up most of the front room. There was a candle burning on the side table, in front of the wedding portrait. But the lid of the coffin was already nailed down. Vera had laid a string of rosary beads on the top, and a small posy of flowers.
‘They said they thought it better that we didn’t see him,’ Vera explained. ‘What with him drowning. He’ll be changed. But you can say goodbye to him anyway.’
Katie stood by the long box with its brass handles. She reached out a finger and ran it along the smooth wood. It didn’t seem to have anything to do with Uncle Patrick. She wondered what it meant, him being changed, and the thought made her uneasy. Then she thought about him when he was alive, and that made her feel very sad. Soon she turned to go out. She tried to forget that the coffin was there, but she kept seeing it in her mind.
That evening, there was a knock at the door. Vera opened it to find Patrick’s employers, the Lawler brothers.
‘We’ve heard the news,’ Seamus Lawler said, taking off his cap. Johnny Lawler followed his example. ‘We’ve come to pay our respects.’
‘You’d better come in,’ Vera said quickly. To Katie’s surprise, she seemed glad to see them. There was no one else to share their loss, to come and see them, apart from Enid Thomas.
The men went into the front room, there was a pause, and then they came through to the back. They were both dark-haired men with stubbly faces that always seemed cast in shadow, not helped by being constantly dusted with coal.
‘Well,’ Seamus said awkwardly. He usually did the talking. ‘We’ll be on
‘Why were they here?’ she whispered.
Her mother suddenly put her hands over her face. ‘Oh my Lord. Oh God in heaven!’ She began to shake.
After a moment she yanked her hands down to her lap, forcing them to be still and swallowing hard, determined not to give way to her emotion. The words jolted out of her.
‘Prepare yourself for a shock. It’s your uncle. They . . . I was at work . . . He . . . The police came . . . He’s been found – in the canal. Last night, when he didn’t come home – well, it was one of those nights. There’ve been so many, when he just goes off, walks himself into exhaustion.’ She stared in a haunted way towards the window. ‘I didn’t think . . . He wasn’t – I mean, so many times, when he’s been—’
Abruptly she sat up, gathering herself and turning to Katie, her eyes full of a terrible intensity. She put her hands on Katie’s shoulders, gripping painfully hard.
‘It was an accident, that’s what it was. A tragic accident that no one could have prevented. D’you understand, Katie? No one else knows how he went about at night, and no one needs to. We don’t know anything, except that he set out full of life, and now he’s gone.’
Katie burst into tears. ‘What d’you mean, he’s gone? Did he jump in the canal?’
‘No!’ her mother cried furiously, shaking her.
‘Ow! Mom! Don’t – you’re hurting.’
‘Don’t you ever say that. Don’t you even think it, d’you hear? It was an accident. That’s all.’
Katie was sobbing. ‘Is Uncle Patrick dead? Isn’t he coming back?’
Her mother stopped shaking her and let go, as if she had gone limp.
‘No,’ she said bleakly. ‘He’s not coming back.’
The coffin was moved into the house the next day, while Katie was at school.
‘What happened?’ Amy said as soon as she got there. ‘Why was there a policeman at your house?’
‘It’s my uncle,’ Katie said, her eyes filling with tears. ‘He’s died in an accident.’ All day she was close to tears.
‘I think you’d better come in and pay your respects,’ Vera said when Katie came home. She seemed to be holding herself in very tight. ‘Come along now – let’s get it over with.’
It was strange and terrible seeing the coffin taking up most of the front room. There was a candle burning on the side table, in front of the wedding portrait. But the lid of the coffin was already nailed down. Vera had laid a string of rosary beads on the top, and a small posy of flowers.
‘They said they thought it better that we didn’t see him,’ Vera explained. ‘What with him drowning. He’ll be changed. But you can say goodbye to him anyway.’
Katie stood by the long box with its brass handles. She reached out a finger and ran it along the smooth wood. It didn’t seem to have anything to do with Uncle Patrick. She wondered what it meant, him being changed, and the thought made her uneasy. Then she thought about him when he was alive, and that made her feel very sad. Soon she turned to go out. She tried to forget that the coffin was there, but she kept seeing it in her mind.
That evening, there was a knock at the door. Vera opened it to find Patrick’s employers, the Lawler brothers.
‘We’ve heard the news,’ Seamus Lawler said, taking off his cap. Johnny Lawler followed his example. ‘We’ve come to pay our respects.’
‘You’d better come in,’ Vera said quickly. To Katie’s surprise, she seemed glad to see them. There was no one else to share their loss, to come and see them, apart from Enid Thomas.
The men went into the front room, there was a pause, and then they came through to the back. They were both dark-haired men with stubbly faces that always seemed cast in shadow, not helped by being constantly dusted with coal.
‘Well,’ Seamus said awkwardly. He usually did the talking. ‘We’ll be on
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