Kyle blocked out the noise and chaos of the other kids and seethed. He was beyond frustrated. The word to describe his aggravation hadn’t been invented yet.
(Kyle made a note to himself: Develop a new word to describe his aggravation.)
The bus came to Mairi’s stop. “My mom’s mad,” Mairi announced as soon as she sat down.
“Why?” Good. Mairi could help distract him a little bit. Take his mind off of Mighty Mike.
“You know the billboard that sits out on the highway? ”
There was a large billboard 3.2 miles from the Bouring town border. (Ever since his brain had gotten bigger, Kyle had been very specific about things like distance and time.)It said, YOU ARE ABOUT TO ENTER THE TOWN OF BOURING … IT’S NOT BORING! As if that were the most clever slogan in the world. On a lark, Kyle had once suggested at a town meeting the slogan: “Bouring: The
U
makes it exciting!” To his delight, people had taken his suggestion seriously and thereafter ensued two weeks of debating, arguing, and pro-and-con editorials in the
Bouring Record.
It was one of his best pranks ever.
Still, in the end the idea had been defeated, and the billboard maintained its current slogan, along with an image of the Bouring Lighthouse and a burst that read, VISIT THE HISTORIC BOURING LIGHTHOUSE! ONLY TEN MINUTES FROM HERE!
Mairi’s mother was the curator of the Bouring Lighthouse Museum, which consisted, really, of a gift shop on the first floor of the lighthouse. The lighthouse was, Kyle had to admit, something of an oddity because Bouring was totally landlocked. There wasn’t even a lake nearby. The biggest body of water within ten miles was the Bouring municipal pool. No one — not even Mairi’s mother — knew why there was a lighthouse in Bouring, but that hadn’t stopped Mrs. MacTaggert from turning it into a museum and getting the town to declare it a tourist attraction.
“What about the billboard?” Kyle asked.
Mairi was nearly fuming. Kyle couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen her so angry. “The town council metlast night and they’re considering changing the billboard to say ‘The Home of Mighty Mike!’ instead of showing the lighthouse. Mom’s really mad.”
Mighty Mike! Again! Did this kid have to insinuate himself into every last possible corner of Kyle’s life and consciousness?
“You know what, Mairi? I don’t like that kid,” Kyle said.
Mairi was taken aback. “It’s not
his
fault, Kyle! It’s the stupid town council. Mike would
never
try to hurt my mom’s business.”
Kyle took a deep breath and did his best to calm Mairi down as the school bus bounced and jolted down the road. He didn’t know that things were about to get worse. He probably should have predicted it, but he just didn’t know.
Things got worse right in the middle of science, Kyle’s favorite subject. It was the only subject where he didn’t go out of his mind with boredom because he could at least look ahead in the book and speculate about different theories and research applications. He didn’t bother paying attention to Miss Schwartz, the science teacher, of course. He already knew more than she ever would know in her entire life.
The door opened without so much as a knock and there stood Sheriff Maxwell Monroe. Six feet two, with shoulders like a Cadillac grille and a face to match.
Kyle stiffened at Monroe’s presence. He couldn’t help it. He’d had his share of run-ins with the sheriff in the past. Too many of them, in fact. He couldn’t stand the sight of Monroe — the shaggy blond hair, the ridiculous handlebar mustache, the watery blue eyes. But the worst part about Monroe was that he was on to Kyle. “Can’t wait until you’re eighteen,” he’d told Kyle more than once. “Can’t wait until I get to throw you in jail for real. I count the days, kiddo.”
Kyle’s mind raced. Why would Monroe be here? Kyle hadn’t so much as laid a whoopee cushion on someone’s chair since “the flu.” He
(Kyle made a note to himself: Develop a new word to describe his aggravation.)
The bus came to Mairi’s stop. “My mom’s mad,” Mairi announced as soon as she sat down.
“Why?” Good. Mairi could help distract him a little bit. Take his mind off of Mighty Mike.
“You know the billboard that sits out on the highway? ”
There was a large billboard 3.2 miles from the Bouring town border. (Ever since his brain had gotten bigger, Kyle had been very specific about things like distance and time.)It said, YOU ARE ABOUT TO ENTER THE TOWN OF BOURING … IT’S NOT BORING! As if that were the most clever slogan in the world. On a lark, Kyle had once suggested at a town meeting the slogan: “Bouring: The
U
makes it exciting!” To his delight, people had taken his suggestion seriously and thereafter ensued two weeks of debating, arguing, and pro-and-con editorials in the
Bouring Record.
It was one of his best pranks ever.
Still, in the end the idea had been defeated, and the billboard maintained its current slogan, along with an image of the Bouring Lighthouse and a burst that read, VISIT THE HISTORIC BOURING LIGHTHOUSE! ONLY TEN MINUTES FROM HERE!
Mairi’s mother was the curator of the Bouring Lighthouse Museum, which consisted, really, of a gift shop on the first floor of the lighthouse. The lighthouse was, Kyle had to admit, something of an oddity because Bouring was totally landlocked. There wasn’t even a lake nearby. The biggest body of water within ten miles was the Bouring municipal pool. No one — not even Mairi’s mother — knew why there was a lighthouse in Bouring, but that hadn’t stopped Mrs. MacTaggert from turning it into a museum and getting the town to declare it a tourist attraction.
“What about the billboard?” Kyle asked.
Mairi was nearly fuming. Kyle couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen her so angry. “The town council metlast night and they’re considering changing the billboard to say ‘The Home of Mighty Mike!’ instead of showing the lighthouse. Mom’s really mad.”
Mighty Mike! Again! Did this kid have to insinuate himself into every last possible corner of Kyle’s life and consciousness?
“You know what, Mairi? I don’t like that kid,” Kyle said.
Mairi was taken aback. “It’s not
his
fault, Kyle! It’s the stupid town council. Mike would
never
try to hurt my mom’s business.”
Kyle took a deep breath and did his best to calm Mairi down as the school bus bounced and jolted down the road. He didn’t know that things were about to get worse. He probably should have predicted it, but he just didn’t know.
Things got worse right in the middle of science, Kyle’s favorite subject. It was the only subject where he didn’t go out of his mind with boredom because he could at least look ahead in the book and speculate about different theories and research applications. He didn’t bother paying attention to Miss Schwartz, the science teacher, of course. He already knew more than she ever would know in her entire life.
The door opened without so much as a knock and there stood Sheriff Maxwell Monroe. Six feet two, with shoulders like a Cadillac grille and a face to match.
Kyle stiffened at Monroe’s presence. He couldn’t help it. He’d had his share of run-ins with the sheriff in the past. Too many of them, in fact. He couldn’t stand the sight of Monroe — the shaggy blond hair, the ridiculous handlebar mustache, the watery blue eyes. But the worst part about Monroe was that he was on to Kyle. “Can’t wait until you’re eighteen,” he’d told Kyle more than once. “Can’t wait until I get to throw you in jail for real. I count the days, kiddo.”
Kyle’s mind raced. Why would Monroe be here? Kyle hadn’t so much as laid a whoopee cushion on someone’s chair since “the flu.” He
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