him, but as a vampire in a ghost story his eyes pulled me towards them.
‘But why would you do such a terrible thing?’ he asked when I’d finished.
‘He was always horrible to me.’ It sounded stupid even as I said it. I wanted to get back at Ralph Aird, but that would have meant telling them about J.B.’s stupid job and Ralph’s dad in the same prison as he was and I just couldn’t say it. I wanted to cry, but I held the tears back and only said again, ‘He’s horrible.’
Murdo sighed. For once he didn’t fly into a rage or throw things or pull at his hair. He only said in a soft Highland lilt, ‘You weren’t in this alone.’
I glanced at J.B. I had already expected this question. So had he. And I had told him again and again that I wouldn’t bring Diane into it. That was the least I could do for her.
‘But why not?’ he had yelled at me. ‘She’s every bit as bad as you. She egged you on, I could tell that in the diary.’
But I wouldn’t tell on her. It was the one thing I could do that was right.
I swallowed and lied. ‘There was no one else involved.’
Murdo shook his head violently. ‘No. No. She was in it with you. Tell me, Lissa.’
But I wouldn’t budge. You don’t grass on your friends.
I was suspended from school for a week. That was bad enough, but worse was to come. As I was walking through the empty playground on my own (I refused to leave with J.B. and he had hurried on for his interview), Diane came rushing up to me. Her lips were white with anger.
‘Where have you been?’ she demanded. But she knew. The news had travelled through the school like an inferno. ‘If you’ve been telling on me, I’ll say you lied. I’ll never forgive you.’
I tried to tell her I hadn’t but she wasn’t in a listening mood.
‘Anyway, I didn’t do anything. You did it all yourself.’
‘Diane I know, I wouldn’t …’ But she only pushed me away.
‘If that’s all you think of our friendship you can just forget it. I don’t want to be friends with you any more.’
And though I called her back, she ran off, wouldn’t listen.
That was the worst thing of all. Diane was no longer my friend. That was finally what made me cry in the quietsolitude of my room, away from everything. I cried because I had lost the only friend I had. I had lost Diane.
If I’d had the nerve to run away from home then, I would have.
I was suspended for a week.
No one phoned to ask where I was.
No one phoned to find out when I was coming back.
No one cared.
My only consolation was that J.B. didn’t get the job. He pretended not to be disappointed when the letter arrived. But he was.
So was Mum, but she looked at me as if it was my fault. ‘Your mind wasn’t on the interview, Jonny.’ I heard her comfort him. ‘You had so many other things to think about.’
The main other thing being me.
Well, J.B., we all have problems, I felt like telling him. I had been expected to go to school, sit exams, do well, when the front pages were full of your trial and your guilt and your villainy.
You’ve just got to get on with it.
Anyway, I had lots to think about myself.
Like going back to school.
Chapter Eleven
My mum offered to come with me the morning I went back to school, but I said no. The last thing I needed was to walk in through the school gates protected by my mother.
So I went alone. Knowing I would be alone the whole day. I wouldn’t even have Diane.
It was even worse than I could have imagined.
As I neared the gates I could see them all waiting for me. All the pupils in my year. They were standing on the pavement forming two lines across from each other. To get into the school I would have to pass between them. They were silent as I approached, so quiet it was terrifying and if I’d had the courage I would have run away then. But all I could do was to walk towards them, my whole body shaking.
Murdo had once told us about ‘running the gauntlet’. Inever thought then that one day
‘But why would you do such a terrible thing?’ he asked when I’d finished.
‘He was always horrible to me.’ It sounded stupid even as I said it. I wanted to get back at Ralph Aird, but that would have meant telling them about J.B.’s stupid job and Ralph’s dad in the same prison as he was and I just couldn’t say it. I wanted to cry, but I held the tears back and only said again, ‘He’s horrible.’
Murdo sighed. For once he didn’t fly into a rage or throw things or pull at his hair. He only said in a soft Highland lilt, ‘You weren’t in this alone.’
I glanced at J.B. I had already expected this question. So had he. And I had told him again and again that I wouldn’t bring Diane into it. That was the least I could do for her.
‘But why not?’ he had yelled at me. ‘She’s every bit as bad as you. She egged you on, I could tell that in the diary.’
But I wouldn’t tell on her. It was the one thing I could do that was right.
I swallowed and lied. ‘There was no one else involved.’
Murdo shook his head violently. ‘No. No. She was in it with you. Tell me, Lissa.’
But I wouldn’t budge. You don’t grass on your friends.
I was suspended from school for a week. That was bad enough, but worse was to come. As I was walking through the empty playground on my own (I refused to leave with J.B. and he had hurried on for his interview), Diane came rushing up to me. Her lips were white with anger.
‘Where have you been?’ she demanded. But she knew. The news had travelled through the school like an inferno. ‘If you’ve been telling on me, I’ll say you lied. I’ll never forgive you.’
I tried to tell her I hadn’t but she wasn’t in a listening mood.
‘Anyway, I didn’t do anything. You did it all yourself.’
‘Diane I know, I wouldn’t …’ But she only pushed me away.
‘If that’s all you think of our friendship you can just forget it. I don’t want to be friends with you any more.’
And though I called her back, she ran off, wouldn’t listen.
That was the worst thing of all. Diane was no longer my friend. That was finally what made me cry in the quietsolitude of my room, away from everything. I cried because I had lost the only friend I had. I had lost Diane.
If I’d had the nerve to run away from home then, I would have.
I was suspended for a week.
No one phoned to ask where I was.
No one phoned to find out when I was coming back.
No one cared.
My only consolation was that J.B. didn’t get the job. He pretended not to be disappointed when the letter arrived. But he was.
So was Mum, but she looked at me as if it was my fault. ‘Your mind wasn’t on the interview, Jonny.’ I heard her comfort him. ‘You had so many other things to think about.’
The main other thing being me.
Well, J.B., we all have problems, I felt like telling him. I had been expected to go to school, sit exams, do well, when the front pages were full of your trial and your guilt and your villainy.
You’ve just got to get on with it.
Anyway, I had lots to think about myself.
Like going back to school.
Chapter Eleven
My mum offered to come with me the morning I went back to school, but I said no. The last thing I needed was to walk in through the school gates protected by my mother.
So I went alone. Knowing I would be alone the whole day. I wouldn’t even have Diane.
It was even worse than I could have imagined.
As I neared the gates I could see them all waiting for me. All the pupils in my year. They were standing on the pavement forming two lines across from each other. To get into the school I would have to pass between them. They were silent as I approached, so quiet it was terrifying and if I’d had the courage I would have run away then. But all I could do was to walk towards them, my whole body shaking.
Murdo had once told us about ‘running the gauntlet’. Inever thought then that one day
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