dress back on and walk down to the bar. This time I order a shot and just sit there, staring at it like it has the power to reveal some hidden message that I’m just too thick to understand. The door opens and I feel the cool night air travel across the room and slip over my skin. The sleeveless dress doesn’t do much to keep me warm, but it does lift my ego. I’ve had three attempts at my number since I walked in. Mental note to self; next time I want meaningless sex , borrow Emma’s dress and walk around commando. It’s like the guys have X-ray vision and know I’ve got nothing on. A ctually, this is weird for me and the no-panties-thing wasn’t on purpose , either. When I went to put on the bra, the panties were missing. They weren’t more than a scrap of fabric, but I didn’t have anything else that would look right under the lace garter, so I went without. Those were my favorite pair of panties. They fit perfectly and showcased my ass, making it look model perfect. I asked Emma if she’d seen them, but I must have left them at Ma’s house with some of my other laundry .
I cross my legs and raise the glass to my lips. Finally, I tip it back . T he amber liquid slides down my throat, burning a hot wake in its path. I take a breath and order another. My process repeats. I have no intention of becoming a drunk. I won’t order another drink after this shot, so I sit with it longer, allowing the buzz from the first shot to penetrate my foul mood.
I don’t know what I’m upset about. So, I couldn’t slee p with Jesse. That just means I’m not a slut, right? Wrong. That voice in the back of my head won’t shut up tonight. I stare at the bar top. The lights gleam off the shiny surface.
I want my life to change, but I don’t make changes. I keep doing the same thing. I f eel eyes on the side of my face, but I don’t look up. It’s another guy wanting my number. I should just tell them that I’m a panty-less fraud, but he’d stop listening at panty-less. I cross my legs tighter, hooking my heel to the back of the stool. I don’t look up. Instead , I trace the glow of the light on the bar top with my fingernail, while I keep my other perfectly manicured hand on the shot glass.
The guy sits next to me and it isn’t until he orders that I notice who he is. His voice drips over my body like liquid seduction. He has the ability to stir something deep inside of me that makes me hot all over. I don’t turn. I don’t look at him. I hold my legs tighter together and try to ignore the sensations pelting my body.
Cole glances at me out of the corner of his eye, “Date didn’t go well?”
“You’re an ass,” I reply, still not looking at him. If I turn my head, if our eyes connect , there’s no way I’ll be able to live through it. I’ll throw my arms around his neck and beg him to take me back. I’m not a prideful person, but I can’t ask him to take me back. I can’t let him know how badly he’s messed with my head.
“You say that to all the men.” Cole sips his drink. The ice cubes clink together when he pla ces the cup on the bar, empty. Charlie, t he bartender , looks at me with questions in his eyes. I look back, willing him to understand that I wan t Cole to leave me alone, but Charlie doesn’t get it . The bartender refills the drinks and leaves us.
“No, ” I say, “ just to you. Did you really have to walk over and give him pointers on getting me into bed? What the hell was that ab out , anyway?” My skin prickles.
Col e’s looking at me, his gaze is sliding over my arms and lands on my chest. Cole watches my breasts swell as I breathe, making no attempt to hide it. “Wow. Did the little guy actually say that? ” After a second, Cole looks away from me. His tone shifts from condescending to serious. “ That’s not what happened , okay? He approached me. I didn’t want to talk to him. On my way out, I went to tell him off and you walked up.”
“Yeah right. Why would Jesse
I cross my legs and raise the glass to my lips. Finally, I tip it back . T he amber liquid slides down my throat, burning a hot wake in its path. I take a breath and order another. My process repeats. I have no intention of becoming a drunk. I won’t order another drink after this shot, so I sit with it longer, allowing the buzz from the first shot to penetrate my foul mood.
I don’t know what I’m upset about. So, I couldn’t slee p with Jesse. That just means I’m not a slut, right? Wrong. That voice in the back of my head won’t shut up tonight. I stare at the bar top. The lights gleam off the shiny surface.
I want my life to change, but I don’t make changes. I keep doing the same thing. I f eel eyes on the side of my face, but I don’t look up. It’s another guy wanting my number. I should just tell them that I’m a panty-less fraud, but he’d stop listening at panty-less. I cross my legs tighter, hooking my heel to the back of the stool. I don’t look up. Instead , I trace the glow of the light on the bar top with my fingernail, while I keep my other perfectly manicured hand on the shot glass.
The guy sits next to me and it isn’t until he orders that I notice who he is. His voice drips over my body like liquid seduction. He has the ability to stir something deep inside of me that makes me hot all over. I don’t turn. I don’t look at him. I hold my legs tighter together and try to ignore the sensations pelting my body.
Cole glances at me out of the corner of his eye, “Date didn’t go well?”
“You’re an ass,” I reply, still not looking at him. If I turn my head, if our eyes connect , there’s no way I’ll be able to live through it. I’ll throw my arms around his neck and beg him to take me back. I’m not a prideful person, but I can’t ask him to take me back. I can’t let him know how badly he’s messed with my head.
“You say that to all the men.” Cole sips his drink. The ice cubes clink together when he pla ces the cup on the bar, empty. Charlie, t he bartender , looks at me with questions in his eyes. I look back, willing him to understand that I wan t Cole to leave me alone, but Charlie doesn’t get it . The bartender refills the drinks and leaves us.
“No, ” I say, “ just to you. Did you really have to walk over and give him pointers on getting me into bed? What the hell was that ab out , anyway?” My skin prickles.
Col e’s looking at me, his gaze is sliding over my arms and lands on my chest. Cole watches my breasts swell as I breathe, making no attempt to hide it. “Wow. Did the little guy actually say that? ” After a second, Cole looks away from me. His tone shifts from condescending to serious. “ That’s not what happened , okay? He approached me. I didn’t want to talk to him. On my way out, I went to tell him off and you walked up.”
“Yeah right. Why would Jesse
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