Beautiful Captivity (The Club #1) by Ashleigh Townshend Page A

novels. Zane picks one up and begins to read. I don’t know what to do, so I sit beside him, and think about school, about getting here, about everything that’s gone.
     
    I was so excited to move on. My mother took the day off work to help me move to the dorms, and she talked for the entire ride up about letting go, about leaving Keith behind. I knew she was right, but I wasn’t ready. It only took a few days, though, of constant calls and Facebook messages, him saying that now I had no excuse. By the time he came to visit, I was angry, and he didn’t even last one night before he ended it, angry that I wasn’t interested.
     
    Keith was my boyfriend in high school, but he was the kind of boyfriend you have because you have nothing else to do. I never really connected to him, and I wasn’t even that attracted to him. When we would make out, or when things got a little heavier and he would ask to finger me, it was always sloppy, boring. I didn’t feel excited about having sex with him, although I actually did want to have sex. I just hadn’t met someone who made me want to have it with them.
     
    After he left, I cried. I didn’t want to sleep with him, but I didn’t want to break up, either. Having a boyfriend mattered to me. I wanted to be in love. I thought maybe I could learn to love him. My roommates comforted me, but they decided I just needed to learn to have fun, to leave behind all the strings that came with sex. I couldn’t do it, at least not all the way. I wanted it to be special. But when I went to the club, I thought I would experiment, see if I could learn to enjoy sex, learn to want to be with a man. I didn’t understand it, but I just wasn’t attracted to anyone sexually. I couldn’t picture sex being pleasurable.
     
    Now, it seems so strange. I’m not happy that they took me, but with Zane, I realized that nothing was wrong with me. It was only that one day, but thinking about his body, thinking about the way he touched me, I get excited again. I never felt like this before, but I want Zane to do it again. I want to do more with him.
     
    Zane gets up to take a shower, leaving me alone on the couch. I picture him naked under the water. It’s arousing, thinking of him. I wonder if he’s touching himself, if he thinks about being with me again. I wonder if he liked what we did.
     
    I think about his belt. I imagine what it would feel like on my naked skin. It can’t be normal that I want to feel that. That I grow wet picturing him hitting me with it again, hard on my ass, right before he enters me.
     
    The thought burns at me, and I take off my pants, lying back on the sofa. I don’t know how to be this attracted to a man. I never really touched myself growing up. I couldn’t think of anything that got me wet, but picturing Zane, remembering him inside of me, imagining him hitting me with his belt again, calling out my name, I need to feel something.
     
    I reach my fingers under the elastic of my panties. My pussy is hot. I didn’t know it got this hot. It’s also drenched, making it easy to slide a couple fingers inside myself. It isn’t like it was with R. That was terrifying, but when I think of Zane, his beautiful body, I let the fear go, and touch myself. I explore the inside of my cunt, running my fingers along the walls, pushing against the spot that makes me wetter. I touch my clit, teasing it, desperate for Zane and his cock.
     
    I don’t hear him come back in the room until he speaks.
     
    “What are you doing?”
     
    I’m embarrassed, but as I look up, I see that he is only wearing his towel from the shower, and his erection is prominent.
     
    “I was remembering being with you. I…” I can’t say it. It’s humiliating. I should not want him this badly.
     
    He drops the towel and grabs his shaft in his hand. “Keep touching yourself, Nichole. But take off the panties. I want you to spread your legs and show me how wet your pussy is. I want to see the place