communicate them and have them addressed in positive and satisfying ways.
When I applied to be Sir’s slave it was only after I had a clear sense of what I wanted out of the relationship. There were many things I didn’t consider: I hadn’t considered the possibility of other slaves being in the relationship or for that matter that my master would have a lover or a master of his own. I hadn’t considered how public the relationship would be or how often visitors would come and go. Al of these were things I faced early on. But I had considered what would be important to me, and when faced with these and other situations I was easily able to adapt because the things I had held as important were also part of the experience.
We clicked right off, but this was, in part, that I had spent a lot of time preparing myself for this change in my life and also because Sir was somewhat of a known quantity to me. I’d read his book, The Master’s Manual, and the columns he wrote for Drummer and International Leatherman. Having done so gave me clues to his style of dominance. His reputation in the leather community ensured a certain trustworthiness and responsibility.
Beyond the initial chemistry we clearly enjoyed the fact that we 30
were able to effectively communicate what we felt we wanted and this al owed us to quickly strip away the unimportant and work on those things about which we needed to reach agreement. Does it work this way for everyone? No, general y not, but the approach is sound and if you can keep from getting lost in the fantasy of slavery you can focus on the things that wil lay the foundation for a similar confidence.
Our lifestyle is a puzzle to the outsider. They don’t understand what it is that makes it interesting and satisfying for us and it isn’t necessary that they do. Ultimately the people we can count on wil move beyond the puzzle and tag it in a way with which they can deal. In any case their acceptance is far more important than their understanding.
This acceptance wil come once they see the magic of your dance and the sense of fulfil ment it brings to both of you.
After Reading Activities
Using your journal, write a 1,000 (or more) word essay describing your future life as a slave. What do you do? Where do you live? What do you say? What is required of you? How does it feel? Let your imagination go wild. Make sure you save what you have written for later.
Write your reflections on the questions found at the beginning of this chapter: How do I have to change to be what I want to become?
How wil you be different when you are a slave? What actions and decisions wil in fact transform you from who you are now to what you seek to become?
Use your journal to write the names, email addresses, and phone numbers of possible references. Contact them for permission to use them as such. Assure them of your discretion.
If you don’t have any references, what can you do to create (find) them? Ask people at your next munch, club meeting, or party what they do about referencing. Use their answers to develop a list as to how you wil develop references for yourself.
Pretend that you have received an email from an applicant who says that he has felt betrayed by people he has met on-line and would like some assurances that you are a trustworthy person. Write a letter in your journal that you think wil al ay his fears by proving that you are trustworthy. Show it to a friend and ask for comments.
31
Copies of
Becoming a slave
may be ordered at
http://www.leatherviews.com
32
When I applied to be Sir’s slave it was only after I had a clear sense of what I wanted out of the relationship. There were many things I didn’t consider: I hadn’t considered the possibility of other slaves being in the relationship or for that matter that my master would have a lover or a master of his own. I hadn’t considered how public the relationship would be or how often visitors would come and go. Al of these were things I faced early on. But I had considered what would be important to me, and when faced with these and other situations I was easily able to adapt because the things I had held as important were also part of the experience.
We clicked right off, but this was, in part, that I had spent a lot of time preparing myself for this change in my life and also because Sir was somewhat of a known quantity to me. I’d read his book, The Master’s Manual, and the columns he wrote for Drummer and International Leatherman. Having done so gave me clues to his style of dominance. His reputation in the leather community ensured a certain trustworthiness and responsibility.
Beyond the initial chemistry we clearly enjoyed the fact that we 30
were able to effectively communicate what we felt we wanted and this al owed us to quickly strip away the unimportant and work on those things about which we needed to reach agreement. Does it work this way for everyone? No, general y not, but the approach is sound and if you can keep from getting lost in the fantasy of slavery you can focus on the things that wil lay the foundation for a similar confidence.
Our lifestyle is a puzzle to the outsider. They don’t understand what it is that makes it interesting and satisfying for us and it isn’t necessary that they do. Ultimately the people we can count on wil move beyond the puzzle and tag it in a way with which they can deal. In any case their acceptance is far more important than their understanding.
This acceptance wil come once they see the magic of your dance and the sense of fulfil ment it brings to both of you.
After Reading Activities
Using your journal, write a 1,000 (or more) word essay describing your future life as a slave. What do you do? Where do you live? What do you say? What is required of you? How does it feel? Let your imagination go wild. Make sure you save what you have written for later.
Write your reflections on the questions found at the beginning of this chapter: How do I have to change to be what I want to become?
How wil you be different when you are a slave? What actions and decisions wil in fact transform you from who you are now to what you seek to become?
Use your journal to write the names, email addresses, and phone numbers of possible references. Contact them for permission to use them as such. Assure them of your discretion.
If you don’t have any references, what can you do to create (find) them? Ask people at your next munch, club meeting, or party what they do about referencing. Use their answers to develop a list as to how you wil develop references for yourself.
Pretend that you have received an email from an applicant who says that he has felt betrayed by people he has met on-line and would like some assurances that you are a trustworthy person. Write a letter in your journal that you think wil al ay his fears by proving that you are trustworthy. Show it to a friend and ask for comments.
31
Copies of
Becoming a slave
may be ordered at
http://www.leatherviews.com
32
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