down and saw that the door was unlocked. Stupid move, friend. Might as well put a sign up that says ‘steal me’ . He opened the door and waited for a siren or for the horn to honk, an alarm of some kind, but…nothing. He glanced at the ratty interior of the car and shook his head. This thing had obviously seen better days.
With a heft and a heave, Dom got down and ripped the lo wer part of the dash out. It was then that he saw the keys dangling in the ignition. You gotta be fucking kidding me? He sat back up and glanced around, surely thinking that it was a setup of some kind.
After ensuring that nobody was indeed watching him, he wedged his large body behind the wheel of the little car and tried to start it. It fought him and belched and backfired, popping and wheezing, bit it finally came to life and sputtered. Dom thought that surely the little rusted car had woken the entire neighbo rhood, but no lights in the nearby windows had come on. He slammed the door shut and pulled out as quickly as he could…which wasn’t very quickly. He had to baby the car to keep it running. He prayed silently and desired greatly to beat the dash but feared the entire car would break and he would be left walking again.
He glanced at the fuel gage and it read half a tank. Surely that was enough to get him to the Air Force base. Dom forced the little car onto the highway and began working his way t oward Aviano, a prayer on his lips that the little car made it without incident, the vehicle fighting him the entire way, belching and farting and backfiring as it slowly picked up speed. Just once I’d like to steal a Benz and cruise in style , he thought as the little Renault shook and shimmied along the road. Dom felt as though he was trapped in a paint shaker and the little machine was trying to loosen his back teeth.
He drove for nearly forty minutes, closing the distance to the base when the little car’s sputtering became much worse. It would lurch forward and then pull back, lurch and pull; and f inally…it sputtered to a stop, the lights on the dash all lighting up as the engine stopped entirely. Dom fought with the car and worked it to the side of the road, a few cars speeding by him, some laying on their horns as they flew by. He noticed that, although he had driven for over a half hour, the fuel gage never moved. Great! I steal a car with a broken gas gage and no gas in the tank!
He forced his way out of the car and slammed the door hard, causing the side mirror to fall off and shatter on the ground. He reared back to kick the little machine before realizing it wasn’t the machine’s fault that he had shitty luck.
Dominic chuckled to himself and laid his head across the top of the car. “Too bad, old girl. I was just getting used to you shaking the shit out of me.”
He turned and looked up the lonely highway, a smattering of vehicles racing past him. Dom shrugged and stuck his thumb out. With a little luck, he might catch a ride.
*****
“So what did the cutie-patootie major have to say?” McDonald asked.
“Same old, same old, ‘try to play nice with the wanna-bes because they’re going to be here for a while’. That sort of crap.” Captain Roberts poured himself another cup of coffee.
“What did you tell her?”
“What do you think I told her, James? I just said ‘yes, ma’am’ and ‘we’re professionals, we can deal with a little friction’ and basically kissed her ass.”
McDonald shot him an evil smile. “I’d like to kiss on that ass. She sure fills that uniform out good, if you know what I mean.”
Roberts shot the man a vicious look. “No, James, I don’t know what you mean. Why don’t you explain it to me.”
McDonald blew him a kiss. “You know exactly what I mean. I bet you probably tore a piece of that off already, ain’t ya, boss?”
Roberts rolled his eyes. “Jesus, McDonald. Could you be any more uncouth?”
“Tell me what a couth is and I’ll try to be
With a heft and a heave, Dom got down and ripped the lo wer part of the dash out. It was then that he saw the keys dangling in the ignition. You gotta be fucking kidding me? He sat back up and glanced around, surely thinking that it was a setup of some kind.
After ensuring that nobody was indeed watching him, he wedged his large body behind the wheel of the little car and tried to start it. It fought him and belched and backfired, popping and wheezing, bit it finally came to life and sputtered. Dom thought that surely the little rusted car had woken the entire neighbo rhood, but no lights in the nearby windows had come on. He slammed the door shut and pulled out as quickly as he could…which wasn’t very quickly. He had to baby the car to keep it running. He prayed silently and desired greatly to beat the dash but feared the entire car would break and he would be left walking again.
He glanced at the fuel gage and it read half a tank. Surely that was enough to get him to the Air Force base. Dom forced the little car onto the highway and began working his way t oward Aviano, a prayer on his lips that the little car made it without incident, the vehicle fighting him the entire way, belching and farting and backfiring as it slowly picked up speed. Just once I’d like to steal a Benz and cruise in style , he thought as the little Renault shook and shimmied along the road. Dom felt as though he was trapped in a paint shaker and the little machine was trying to loosen his back teeth.
He drove for nearly forty minutes, closing the distance to the base when the little car’s sputtering became much worse. It would lurch forward and then pull back, lurch and pull; and f inally…it sputtered to a stop, the lights on the dash all lighting up as the engine stopped entirely. Dom fought with the car and worked it to the side of the road, a few cars speeding by him, some laying on their horns as they flew by. He noticed that, although he had driven for over a half hour, the fuel gage never moved. Great! I steal a car with a broken gas gage and no gas in the tank!
He forced his way out of the car and slammed the door hard, causing the side mirror to fall off and shatter on the ground. He reared back to kick the little machine before realizing it wasn’t the machine’s fault that he had shitty luck.
Dominic chuckled to himself and laid his head across the top of the car. “Too bad, old girl. I was just getting used to you shaking the shit out of me.”
He turned and looked up the lonely highway, a smattering of vehicles racing past him. Dom shrugged and stuck his thumb out. With a little luck, he might catch a ride.
*****
“So what did the cutie-patootie major have to say?” McDonald asked.
“Same old, same old, ‘try to play nice with the wanna-bes because they’re going to be here for a while’. That sort of crap.” Captain Roberts poured himself another cup of coffee.
“What did you tell her?”
“What do you think I told her, James? I just said ‘yes, ma’am’ and ‘we’re professionals, we can deal with a little friction’ and basically kissed her ass.”
McDonald shot him an evil smile. “I’d like to kiss on that ass. She sure fills that uniform out good, if you know what I mean.”
Roberts shot the man a vicious look. “No, James, I don’t know what you mean. Why don’t you explain it to me.”
McDonald blew him a kiss. “You know exactly what I mean. I bet you probably tore a piece of that off already, ain’t ya, boss?”
Roberts rolled his eyes. “Jesus, McDonald. Could you be any more uncouth?”
“Tell me what a couth is and I’ll try to be
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