just hear all the rumors now. I don't
care that much, but my mother will. She is always thinking about
how this has affected her… and oh, the poor baby. I know she is
worried about what kind of mother I will be. She continually
reminds me that my partying ways will be over. That life will no
longer be about me, but rather my baby and my family life with Sam.
Oh how I resent these comments. I want her, Sam, and everyone else
to know that I will get my life back! I will be a good mother to
this baby. I it will not stop me from doing things for me, like
getting my body back and looking for a modeling agent.
I desperately want a modeling career. I will
not let this baby will not stop me!
November 14, 1978
I gave birth to John Michael O’Malley at 1:30
pm yesterday. He is 8 pounds 1 ounce and 20 ½ inches long with no
hair! Sam and I named him Jack after his paternal grandfather.
Labor was far worse than I expected. The last several weeks have
been miserable since sleeping was so difficult. It started with
cramping in my back, which crept around to my stomach. I woke Sam
at 2 in the morning and we headed down to Methodist Hospital. After
almost 10 hours of labor and two whole hours of pushing, Jack
finally arrived.
When he was placed in my arms I didn’t know
what to feel. It was almost like the nurse handed me a doll. I
didn’t FEEL anything but tired and sore. All I could think about
was having Sam get me a milkshake from Steak-n-Shake. Is this bad?
Should I be feeling like I am madly in love with this little being?
He is awfully cute, but he looks just like him, “him” not being
Sam.
I thought about how I might be deceiving Sam
when I filled out the birth certificate. I know deep down that Jack
is not his baby. I have started to believe my own lie. The last
time we slept together before our break up was Valentine’s Day. He
had taken me to Hollyhock Hill. After dinner we decided to head to
Holliday Park for a hike. Having sex in the car was not ideal, but
both of our parents were home for the night and there were no other
options. After we finished, Sam asked about my plans for the
upcoming weekend. I told him I was going to a movie with Julie,
Scott, and Greg. He said it sounded like a double date. I assured
him that we were all just friends. (Sometimes Greg and I were
friends with benefits. Greg wasn't boyfriend material, but he was
so cute.)
This led to a huge argument that ended with
Sam dropping me off at the Peaches Record Store on the Broad Ripple
strip. That was the end. Until the day I arrived on his porch step
to tell him I was pregnant.
A part of me feels guilty for harboring this
secret. I know exactly who the father is. The thought of it makes
me sick!
My plan has worked. So, I have to move past
these guilty thoughts. I need to focus on my life with Sam and
Jack.
The birth certificate reads……
Mother: Cynthia Ann Napier
Father: Samuel Paul O’Malley
Child: John Michael O’Malley
Birthdate: November 14, 1978
December 1978
It’s Christmas time! The Broad Ripple
villagers are out and about getting ready for all the festivities,
while I’m stuck in this little house on Crestview with a baby who
won’t stop crying. I’m alone almost all the time. Sam works nights
then picks up extra shifts on his days off. My only outlet is to
take Jack to my mother’s or to Mary Alice’s so I can go out with my
friends. I have been doing this more often and I think Sam is
starting to resent the fact that I am spending so much money. He
gives me an allowance which I seem to go through faster and faster
each week.
I tell my mom I am going to the grocery or a
movie then I meetup with my old drinking buddies at the Monkey’s
Tail. Part of me feels bad about this, but I am just so bored. I
feel so cooped up at home. I find myself constantly thinking about
the life I had planned before I got pregnant.
My dream of modeling is now a broken reality.
My plan was to move to New York City after high school and
care that much, but my mother will. She is always thinking about
how this has affected her… and oh, the poor baby. I know she is
worried about what kind of mother I will be. She continually
reminds me that my partying ways will be over. That life will no
longer be about me, but rather my baby and my family life with Sam.
Oh how I resent these comments. I want her, Sam, and everyone else
to know that I will get my life back! I will be a good mother to
this baby. I it will not stop me from doing things for me, like
getting my body back and looking for a modeling agent.
I desperately want a modeling career. I will
not let this baby will not stop me!
November 14, 1978
I gave birth to John Michael O’Malley at 1:30
pm yesterday. He is 8 pounds 1 ounce and 20 ½ inches long with no
hair! Sam and I named him Jack after his paternal grandfather.
Labor was far worse than I expected. The last several weeks have
been miserable since sleeping was so difficult. It started with
cramping in my back, which crept around to my stomach. I woke Sam
at 2 in the morning and we headed down to Methodist Hospital. After
almost 10 hours of labor and two whole hours of pushing, Jack
finally arrived.
When he was placed in my arms I didn’t know
what to feel. It was almost like the nurse handed me a doll. I
didn’t FEEL anything but tired and sore. All I could think about
was having Sam get me a milkshake from Steak-n-Shake. Is this bad?
Should I be feeling like I am madly in love with this little being?
He is awfully cute, but he looks just like him, “him” not being
Sam.
I thought about how I might be deceiving Sam
when I filled out the birth certificate. I know deep down that Jack
is not his baby. I have started to believe my own lie. The last
time we slept together before our break up was Valentine’s Day. He
had taken me to Hollyhock Hill. After dinner we decided to head to
Holliday Park for a hike. Having sex in the car was not ideal, but
both of our parents were home for the night and there were no other
options. After we finished, Sam asked about my plans for the
upcoming weekend. I told him I was going to a movie with Julie,
Scott, and Greg. He said it sounded like a double date. I assured
him that we were all just friends. (Sometimes Greg and I were
friends with benefits. Greg wasn't boyfriend material, but he was
so cute.)
This led to a huge argument that ended with
Sam dropping me off at the Peaches Record Store on the Broad Ripple
strip. That was the end. Until the day I arrived on his porch step
to tell him I was pregnant.
A part of me feels guilty for harboring this
secret. I know exactly who the father is. The thought of it makes
me sick!
My plan has worked. So, I have to move past
these guilty thoughts. I need to focus on my life with Sam and
Jack.
The birth certificate reads……
Mother: Cynthia Ann Napier
Father: Samuel Paul O’Malley
Child: John Michael O’Malley
Birthdate: November 14, 1978
December 1978
It’s Christmas time! The Broad Ripple
villagers are out and about getting ready for all the festivities,
while I’m stuck in this little house on Crestview with a baby who
won’t stop crying. I’m alone almost all the time. Sam works nights
then picks up extra shifts on his days off. My only outlet is to
take Jack to my mother’s or to Mary Alice’s so I can go out with my
friends. I have been doing this more often and I think Sam is
starting to resent the fact that I am spending so much money. He
gives me an allowance which I seem to go through faster and faster
each week.
I tell my mom I am going to the grocery or a
movie then I meetup with my old drinking buddies at the Monkey’s
Tail. Part of me feels bad about this, but I am just so bored. I
feel so cooped up at home. I find myself constantly thinking about
the life I had planned before I got pregnant.
My dream of modeling is now a broken reality.
My plan was to move to New York City after high school and
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